Doug Casey on the Coming Holy War

Via Casey Research

Justin: Doug, Turkey’s foreign minister recently said that “wars of religion” are coming to Europe. Do you think this could actually happen?

Doug: Well, human nature hasn’t changed in many thousands of years. And religion is important to the human animal. Perhaps it’s always been something that people were prone to fight about, but the historical record shows that religious wars only started with the invention of Judaism, Christianity and Islam. Of course, these religions—which have always been at war with each other, and all other religions—are similar in that they believe in one god. Pagan religions were and are accepting of other people’s gods and beliefs.

The question is, which god is the right one? Should you believe in Yahweh, or Jesus, or Allah? Because it appears to me that they’re all very different, based upon what they say and what they have their followers believe. Islam and Christianity have been duking it out since the 7th century, and that’s unlikely to change. They both claim to have the one and only true god, but they’re very different gods—not at all the same one. So it’s an irreconcilable difference.

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Justin: So, the ingredients for a holy war have always been there?

Doug: Yes. Up to about 100 years ago, Christians felt a moral obligation to convert everyone, including other misguided Christians. Now it’s mostly just the Muslims who feel that way. It’s entirely possible, even likely, we’re going to have an outright war of religion. Although, in the highly Politically Correct West, it will have to be called something else.

The ongoing invasion of Europe by Muslims is one aspect of it—although that’s not so much a religious thing per se. That’s partly because the Muslims are migrating mostly for economic reasons. And because religion is a dead duck in Europe today. Europe is a post-Christian society. Very few people go to church or take Christianity seriously in Europe, it’s a very secular society. Which is a bit of a problem, because they’ve taken the State for their new god.

But the State doesn’t promise anybody an afterlife. So, in my opinion, Europeans are actually ripe for conversion to Islam. It’s a serious problem, because Islam is incompatible with, and antithetical to Western Civilization.

Justin: Why should the average American care about this?

Doug: It’s part of the gradual destruction of Western culture. Lots of termites—including socialism, cultural Marxism, gender warfare—have been eating away at the foundations of Western Civilization for decades. Islam, in itself, isn’t a real threat. The Koran, which PC types love to treat with respect, is just poorly written medieval sci-fi. It’s living proof that humans are capable of believing absolutely anything.

That said, Islam is a threat to the West because tens of millions of migrants are being invited to come and live at the expense of the current residents. Europe will collapse from within, as did Rome. The average European believes in nothing—except that his civilization not only isn’t worthy, but is actually evil. No wonder the migrants treat them with contempt.

The Mohammedans—although I’ll note it’s now very un-PC to call them that—are technologically and economically backward. As long as they put the Koran at the center of their lives—and they have to, because it is the direct, incontrovertible word of Allah—they’ll remain backward. If, through an accident of geology, there wasn’t a lot of low cost oil in places they live, the West would have no reason to care what they think, say, or do. They’d be no more than an interesting tourist attraction.

The good news is that, over the next 100 years, most Muslims will fall away from their primitive beliefs. But that’s another story… And a lot is going to happen in the meantime.

These insiders are all quietly backing what The Economist calls “one of the world’s hottest investments.” Already, some of these plays have climbed an extraordinary 1,442% in 5 months… 503% in 30 days… 1,696% in 10 days. If you feel like you’ve missed out on this bull market, then watch this video

Justin: Doug, I know you think the European Union (EU) has been destined to fail from the start. Could religious tensions spark this inevitable crisis? Or will an economic or financial crisis be the final nail in the EU’s coffin?

Doug: Religion is definitely playing into the crisis. Because you have to remember that, in continental Europe, Kosovo, Albania, and Turkey, are already Muslim, as are parts of Bulgaria. 10% of Western Europe is already Muslim. There are about 20 million Muslims in southern Russia, and that’s going to be a big problem for Moscow. There’s always blowback from running an empire, something the French and British have found as well. And Americans are discovering. Enemy sympathizers are already within the gates. London is turning into Karachi, Paris into Kinshasa, and Rome into Lagos.

I wouldn’t doubt that there’s going to be a war against Islam. Even though, as I said, very few Europeans take Christianity seriously anymore. Islam, however, is much more virulent than Christianity—it’s like Christianity in the Middle Ages. Even if the average Muslim is basically “get along go along” with his religion in daily life, when push comes to shove, yeah, he takes his religion quite seriously—the way Christians did hundreds of years ago. So this is very serious.

It’s a cultural war, much more than an economic or military one. And I’m afraid the West has already about lost it. It’s really tragic, because almost everything good in the world has come out of the West—in particular freedom, capitalism, individualism, science, technology, literature. Future generations will miss them. It’s sad.

Justin: Doug, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.

Doug: Sure, anytime.


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31 Comments
Iska Waran
Iska Waran
April 8, 2017 8:29 am

Atheism holds that there’s no heaven or hell.
Islam holds that there’s heaven for true Muslims and hell for everyone else.
Modern Christianity holds that everyone goes to heaven and there is no hell.

Christianity needs to rediscover hell because if there is one, the people who plow trucks into crowds go there and somebody needs to tell them that.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Iska Waran
April 8, 2017 9:09 am

Christianity holds that everyone has the opportunity to “go to heaven” through Christ, but it is an individual and conditional choice.

John 3:15-16 Then everyone who believes in him will have eternal life. God loved the world this way: He gave his only Son so that everyone who believes in him will not die but will have eternal life. (GW)

If someone does not believe and profess this, that Jesus is the Christ come in the flesh and has brought redemption with God through him, he may be calling himself “Christian” but is not.

gilberts
gilberts
  Iska Waran
April 9, 2017 9:29 am

No, Sir, I disagree.
Islam is strictly and passionately about the fervent desire to wait not for the afterlife, but in the here and now, to build Hell on Earth.

Zarathustra
Zarathustra
April 8, 2017 10:48 am

Yahweh = Ahura Mazda but the Jews fucked up the story and made it all about them, not God. Then Jesus, or his followers, fucked it up again by making it about God again, but including the personalizing aspect that has always bedeviled the Jews. Later Mohammed came along and fucked it up a third time by turning God into a totalitarian monster; a sort of supernatural Stalin.

God does not need or want worship. Think about that for a minute. What the fuck does the creator of the universe want with your petty little worship and praise. You have no clue!
What god wants is for us to be happy, virtuous and kind within our limited little existence. That’s it, man.

Edwitness
Edwitness
  Zarathustra
April 8, 2017 12:58 pm

Prophecy proves the Bible. All of it.
Starting from the very first man and woman we see God saying what the future holds for mankind and the rest of creation. He told them the serpent would bruise Jesus’ heal, but Jesus would crush his head. That there would be suffering and hard work. Gen.3
Daniel gave very specific description for the global kingdoms from his time forward. So specific and detailed was his description that historians have tried to prove Daniel was written after the events took place. To no avail.
See Daniel 2:28-ff for this discussion.
They have come and gone exactly as the God of the Bible revealed it to Daniel.
Isaiah gave the message God told him about the messiah and what He would do and what He would mean for His people. He gave very a specific description of these just as Daniel did of the things God showed to him. These things were fulfilled in Jesus to the letter. How and where He would be born. How He would die. Etc…. All there to read for those who really want to know the truth.
When He came Jesus said the things in the OT were written of Him so Israel would know Him when He came. The Jewish nation as a whole rejected the parts of scripture that expressed the fact that the messiah would die for them. Much like you have Z. Because it was their desire to reign over all the earth. As it is your greatest desire to be happy. So they decided to kill Him just as the OT scriptures said they would.
Then Jesus told them He was the only way to heaven. He told them they would suffer persecution and affliction after they chose to follow Him. That they would have to endure even unto death. He also told them they would be dispersed as a people throughout the world. And that this dispersion was spoken of by the prophets.
But, there was a message for Israel that would speak volumes to all of us that had come to believe in Jesus as savior and Lord. That message was that God would bring them back into their land at a very specific time in history. At a time when there was great upheaval politically and spiritually. Israel would be restored to her land at that exact time, to the day even that it was prophesied. And that their return to their land would signify the last generation before the great tribulation and His return to rule and reign in the earth for a thousand years.
Ezekiel prophesied of the rebirth of Israel in 1948 and its precise fulfillment in our generation on May 15, 1948. It is one of the greatest fulfillments of Bible prophecy in history. Twenty-five centuries ago, while he was a slave during the Babylonian Captivity, (606 – 536 BC), the Lord revealed to the prophet Ezekiel, the precise year – 1948 – when Israel would finally be restored to the Promised Land. The Jew’s eternal relationship to the Holy Land is a major theme of Bible prophecy. In the Bible, times were specified in precise detail regarding the duration of the time when the Jews were to be exiled from the Promised Land and when God will allow them to return to the Holy Land.
Ezekiel’s unusual prophecy revealed the precise duration of the Jewish exiles worldwide Diaspora and the actual time of their prophesied return to the Promised Land in May 14, 1948. Ezekiel prophesied that the end of Israel’s worldwide captivity would occur after a period of 2,483.8 calendar years had elapsed following the beginning of the prophesied period of the Jewish exile in the Spring of 536 B.C.

2483.8
-536.4
= 1947.4 – 1Yr
= 1948.4

The nation of Israel proclaimed may 14, 1948

The point is there is no book that makes the claims the Bible does in telling of future events with such accuracy. And in this book we find the author, who proves who He is by these prophecies, saying that Jesus is the only way to heaven. John14:6
And that without Him there is a real hell that those who reject His free gift will go to, because we all are allowed free will to go with the god we choose to spend eternity with. Happiness is never the goal for those who have trusted in Jesus. A reading of what the apostle Paul went through (beaten with rods 3 times, faced death continually, 5 times Received 39 lashes, once stoned, suffered shipwreck 3 times, a night and a day in the deep; in journeyings often, in perils of waters, in perils of robbers, in perils by his own countrymen, in perils by the heathen, in perils in the city, in perils in the wilderness, in perils in the sea, in perils among false brethren, in weariness and painfulness, in watchings often, in hunger and thirst, in fastings often, in cold and nakedness.) after he came to faith in Jesus makes this abundantly clear. To believe otherwise is to trust in idols.
In all this Paul said he was abundantly blessed. Blessed means happinesses. Which means that happy is not related to our circumstances. It comes from the God we serve regardless of circumstances.
Blessings:-}

Mike Murray
Mike Murray
  Edwitness
April 8, 2017 2:04 pm

“Prophecy proves the Bible. All of it”.
What a crock! Just like the Hadith and Mohammad prove the Koran, and the Oracle at Delphi “proves” Zeus. Do you count only the original text from the Torah, or do you count the agreed upon editing done by the Council of Nicaea in 325? Care to throw in Nostradamus too? Book of Mormon? Zoroastrians?
Your insistence that “my god is right and the rest is a cult” is no different than any other religion of true believers, and just as dangerous. I’d like to see the death of Islam, not because they are heretics, but because the religion is being used as an excuse to kill people in job lots. I don’t give a damn what you believe, as long as you leave me and mine alone.

“Religion supports nobody. It has to be supported. It produces no wheat, no corn; it plows no land; it fells no forests. It is a perpetual mendicant. It lives on the labors of others, and then has the arrogance to pretend that it supports the giver.
– Robert G. Ingersoll

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Mike Murray
April 8, 2017 3:49 pm

You should try studying the prophecies sometime, then look at the world around you as it develops to compare to them.

You might change your mind, I know the Mad Dog Atheist I was when I was younger did.

But just a suggestion, it’s your life and your eternity to do with as you please. Something called free will.

jimmieoakland
jimmieoakland
  Mike Murray
April 8, 2017 10:46 pm

Ingersoll was a lawyer, so it is a little ironic for him to be commenting on the social utility of religion, don’t you think?

gilberts
gilberts
  Mike Murray
April 9, 2017 9:32 am

He needs money!
He always needs money! He’s all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can’t handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit! -G. Carlin (May Joe Pesce have mercy on him)

jimmieoakland
jimmieoakland
April 8, 2017 11:10 am

I’m curious as to why he thinks that most Muslims will fall away from their primitive beliefs in the next 100 years. Success tends to validate a culture’s confidence in its belief system, not undermine it, and Islam is currently on the march in Europe. The belief in “progress” through science and technology has been an undisputed dogma of the West for a couple of centuries, and it is only in the face of its many downsides, environmental degradation and so forth, that the belief is beginning to be challenged. If Muslims “primitive’ beliefs are abandoned, it will be more likely be as a result of degradation of their culture, and that could take centuries. As far as Christianity being dead in Europe, I’m not so sure; it is a remarkably resilient religion, and at its low points, champions always seem to arise. In the 20th century, and even today, two of the most popular writers in the West are C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien, whose Christian inspired books are still read and have spawned wildly successful movie franchises. We’ve also seen a remarkable string of popes, one of which showed how to topple a regime without a single battalion backing him up. Instructive too is Russia, which, after 75 years of government enforced atheism, has had of late a resurgence in monasticism. Perhaps Europe is only waiting for another Benedict to appear and set the continent on fire with vocations and religious fervor.

The past is prologue, but not necessarily predictive. And as one who has studies a bit of history, all I really know is that things will change, and we will be in for a lot of surprising turn of events.

kokoda - the most deplorable
kokoda - the most deplorable
  jimmieoakland
April 8, 2017 1:40 pm

jimmie….I could never write as well as you.

jimmieoakland
jimmieoakland
  kokoda - the most deplorable
April 8, 2017 10:17 pm

Thank you for the compliment.

Gayle
Gayle
April 8, 2017 11:53 am

The blessing and curse of Christianity is the freedom it allows the individual Believer. Within a framework of a few broad principles clearly taught in the Bible, belief in the resurrection grace of Jesus imposes a terrible liberty to obey or disobey, to find the narrow way and avoid the broad way, to find through mistakes and failures that a loving God will work everything ultimately to our good. This freedom is what has informed the scientific and social progress of Western Civilization, admittedly in fits and starts, over the centuries.

Islam, on the other hand, offers a safe, rules-oriented framework authored by a fearful God who demands certain behaviors to achieve acceptance. Legalistic religions are always popular because spiritual value can be easily measured by outward behaviors without any accountability for matters of the heart. (And this is the reason Jesus was always critical of the Pharisees.) The judgmental God of Islam has hindered its adherents from progressing in the same way that Christian culture has because of the demand for life based on fear, not freedom.

Westerners have already begun converting to Islam, presumably because a post-Christian world has created a spiritual void that must be filled. Europeans will perhaps wake up when they see their beloved cultural shrines destroyed and their freedoms negated in the name of Allah.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Gayle
April 8, 2017 12:38 pm

Christianity recognizes that salvation and atonement with God is through Christ, is an individual free will choice, and not something that can be earned by actions either voluntary or forced.

In Islam you have to earn your way to Heaven through observance of strict religious practices, in Christianity you only have to accept it through believing in Christ.

Zarathustra
Zarathustra
  Anonymous
April 8, 2017 4:14 pm

There is no free choice in Christianity. You are bribed to accept the divinity of Jesus by the offer of eternal life and threatened with eternal damnation if you do not. Free choice is what Ahura Mazda offers because there is no reward if you accept the teachings of Zarathustra nor any punishment if you do not. I don’t know why this is so hard to understand but I do know why Jesus would be more popular; he offers free shit if you vote for him. I think Jesus was the first modern democrat.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Zarathustra
April 8, 2017 4:28 pm

You seem to have mad a choice.

Was it a free one?

Edwitness
Edwitness
  Anonymous
April 8, 2017 6:38 pm

Z did choose freely anon. His choice is a false god. And we all go with the god we choose. All false gods will spend eternity in the lake of fire. That is the judgment of the true God. Where we spend our eternity depends solely upon which God or gods we choose to spend eternity with.
Blessings:-}

Zarathustra
Zarathustra
  Edwitness
April 8, 2017 7:45 pm

Really I am torn. My mind says Ahura Mazda is God. My dick says Elohim (or whatever the mormon name for god is best). I mean who wouldn’t want to spend eternity as a polygamous god ruling over my own personal planet?

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Zarathustra
April 8, 2017 7:56 pm

That’s not what is going to happen, anymore than Muslim martyrs getting 99 virgins to use for eternity is.

But you also have the option of living a perfect life, those who live a perfect life are not condemned because they have no sin to condemn them.

Hard do do that though, since we all inherited Adams sinful nature, original sin, from our fathers (our male parent) and it takes its toll of sin on us before we are even able to realize it is doing so.

Please consider the other option of salvation through Christ, it will actually let you live a fuller, not a lesser, life.

Edwitness
Edwitness
  Zarathustra
April 9, 2017 12:11 pm

The true God, Jesus of Nazareth, is the only way to heaven and true joy and peace. Not only because He said so. But, because He is the only man to ever conquer death. And in conquering death He became the way to eternal life.
All other men that presented themselves as gods are still dead in the grave. Their bones are still there to prove it. But, Jesus’ body was gone from the tomb after only three days. By making the way through the barrier that death is, He made the way for us to follow Him into that eternal life that only He can provide.

Rob
Rob
April 8, 2017 3:15 pm

So what. How does it matter in the least that one death cult believes in one dead guy and the other death cult believes in a different dead guy. They are still death cults and will in the end, either disappear, or they will destroy the world in their ignorance. I personally feel that it is the latter but then I don’t expect to be around to see it happen…so what do I care.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Rob
April 8, 2017 3:54 pm

You should care because of what comes after you aren’t around to see it, and what that is is dependent entirely on yourself and the decision you make about it now.

BTW, Christians don’t worship a “dead guy”, the worship the now fully revealed and living God of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.

Edwitness
Edwitness
April 8, 2017 3:36 pm

Except for the fact that the prophecies I referred to prove the God of the Bible is the only true God. No other can truthfully claim 100% accuracy. The coming great trib will convince all the naysayers of this fact.
Since they choose to remain blind to it now.
Blessings:-}
[imgcomment image[/img]

TampaRed
TampaRed
April 8, 2017 9:21 pm

Several of you would make good Christian apologists,and Anonymous is pulling double duty over on one of the Jew slamming threads.
Here’a a little known song that gives a different take on one of the “slightly” bigger events in history.

Hershel
Hershel
April 9, 2017 8:29 am

Other religions also have prophecy, and not requiring the fuzzy math.

Christianity is no better than Islam in executing heretics and disbelievers, or even different types of believers. Moderate muslims are no different to modern christians who accept gays and female leaders etc against their sctipture. When monarchs and popes were political as well as spiritual leaders, christians committed way more and way worse genocide than muslims ever did. That stopped after republics with seperation of church and state were created. The political could dictate over the religious and christianity was watered down. It doesnt matter at all if Jesus is real, what matters is the christian culture of calling transgender an abomination and ‘wives submit to your husbands’ excluding feminism, adultery punished by death instead of the only recourse being divorce which was also a sin, becoming normal.

The culture has been weakened because the religion has no say over the legal which is dictated by atheist academics to politicians and legislators . Islam is alone in the world resistant to cultural marxism, a new religion because it does not have seperation of church and state.

Edwitness
Edwitness
  Hershel
April 9, 2017 6:56 pm

True Christians were the recipients of the destruction as much as anyone was when the RCC were both spiritual and political leaders. By the way. Nothing has changed in that regard. It’s just that the killing is being done by surrogates currently.

gilberts
gilberts
April 9, 2017 9:34 am

I’m a Christian, but damn we have a lot of problems in our faith. I think Carlin always spotted the baloney and called it out pretty well.

When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ’til the end of time!

But He loves you. He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He’s all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can’t handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!

But I want you to know something, this is sincere, I want you to know, when it comes to believing in God, I really tried. I really, really tried. I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up.

Something is wrong here. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. Something is definitely wrong. This is not good work. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. Results like these do not belong on the résumé of a Supreme Being. This is the kind of shit you’d expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. And just between you and me, in any decently-run universe, this guy would’ve been out on his all-powerful ass a long time ago. And by the way, I say “this guy”, because I firmly believe, looking at these results, that if there is a God, it has to be a man.

No woman could or would ever fuck things up like this. So, if there is a God, I think most reasonable people might agree that he’s at least incompetent, and maybe, just maybe, doesn’t give a shit. Doesn’t give a shit, which I admire in a person, and which would explain a lot of these bad results.

So rather than be just another mindless religious robot, mindlessly and aimlessly and blindly believing that all of this is in the hands of some spooky incompetent father figure who doesn’t give a shit, I decided to look around for something else to worship. Something I could really count on.

And immediately, I thought of the sun. Happened like that. Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. Well, not overnight, you can’t see the sun at night. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. Several reasons. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? Unlike some other gods I could mention, I can actually see the sun. I’m big on that. If I can see something, I don’t know, it kind of helps the credibility along, you know? So everyday I can see the sun, as it gives me everything I need; heat, light, food, flowers in the park, reflections on the lake, an occasional skin cancer, but hey. At least there are no crucifixions, and we’re not setting people on fire simply because they don’t agree with us.

Sun worship is fairly simple. There’s no mystery, no miracles, no pageantry, no one asks for money, there are no songs to learn, and we don’t have a special building where we all gather once a week to compare clothing. And the best thing about the sun, it never tells me I’m unworthy. Doesn’t tell me I’m a bad person who needs to be saved. Hasn’t said an unkind word. Treats me fine. So, I worship the sun. But, I don’t pray to the sun. Know why? I wouldn’t presume on our friendship. It’s not polite.

I’ve often thought people treat God rather rudely, don’t you? Asking trillions and trillions of prayers every day. Asking and pleading and begging for favors. Do this, gimme that, I need a new car, I want a better job. And most of this praying takes place on Sunday His day off. It’s not nice. And it’s no way to treat a friend.

But people do pray, and they pray for a lot of different things, you know, your sister needs an operation on her crotch, your brother was arrested for defecating in a mall. But most of all, you’d really like to fuck that hot little redhead down at the convenience store. You know, the one with the eyepatch and the clubfoot? Can you pray for that? I think you’d have to. And I say, fine. Pray for anything you want. Pray for anything, but what about the Divine Plan?

Remember that? The Divine Plan. Long time ago, God made a Divine Plan. Gave it a lot of thought, decided it was a good plan, put it into practice. And for billions and billions of years, the Divine Plan has been doing just fine. Now, you come along, and pray for something. Well suppose the thing you want isn’t in God’s Divine Plan? What do you want Him to do? Change His plan? Just for you? Doesn’t it seem a little arrogant? It’s a Divine Plan. What’s the use of being God if every run-down shmuck with a two-dollar prayerbook can come along and fuck up Your Plan?

And here’s something else, another problem you might have: Suppose your prayers aren’t answered. What do you say? “Well, it’s God’s will.” “Thy Will Be Done.” Fine, but if it’s God’s will, and He’s going to do what He wants to anyway, why the fuck bother praying in the first place? Seems like a big waste of time to me! Couldn’t you just skip the praying part and go right to His Will? It’s all very confusing.

So to get around a lot of this, I decided to worship the sun. But, as I said, I don’t pray to the sun. You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Two reasons: First of all, I think he’s a good actor, okay? To me, that counts. Second, he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn’t fuck around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with.

For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog, Joe Pesci straightened that cocksucker out with one visit. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with a simple baseball bat.

So I’ve been praying to Joe for about a year now. And I noticed something. I noticed that all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50% rate. Half the time I get what I want, half the time I don’t. Same as God, 50-50. Same as the four-leaf clover and the horseshoe, the wishing well and the rabbit’s foot, same as the Mojo Man, same as the Voodoo Lady who tells you your fortune by squeezing the goat’s testicles, it’s all the same: 50-50. So just pick your superstition, sit back, make a wish, and enjoy yourself.

And for those of you who look to The Bible for moral lessons and literary qualities, I might suggest a couple of other stories for you. You might want to look at the Three Little Pigs, that’s a good one. Has a nice happy ending, I’m sure you’ll like that. Then there’s Little Red Riding Hood, although it does have that X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn’t care for, by the way. And finally, I’ve always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I like the best? “All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again.” That’s because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None, not one, no God, never was.

In fact, I’m gonna put it this way. If there is a God, may he strike this audience dead! See? Nothing happened. Nothing happened? Everybody’s okay? All right, tell you what, I’ll raise the stakes a little bit. If there is a God, may he strike me dead. See? Nothing happened, oh, wait, I’ve got a little cramp in my leg. And my balls hurt. Plus, I’m blind. I’m blind, oh, now I’m okay again, must have been Joe Pesci, huh? God Bless Joe Pesci. Thank you all very much. Joe Bless You!

(Copyright 1999 by George Carlin. Printed without permission.)

Edwitness
Edwitness
  gilberts
April 9, 2017 7:07 pm

Great post. I get a kick out of George most of the time because he was a real thinker. Problem for him was that was how he tried to know the Creator. Through mental ascention. But, it’s for sure now that he knows there is a Creator. And that He loves him so much He allowed him his free will choice to go with that sun god he chose to believe in. Because He does not force Himself on anyone.

gilberts
gilberts
April 9, 2017 9:35 am
Mike Murray
Mike Murray
  gilberts
April 9, 2017 12:01 pm

I notice there is a lot of talk about “faith”, but no reply to what that is based on. Would the “faithful” care to address the Council of Nicaea in 325, the Reformation, the adoption of Saturnalia, or Papal infallibility, just to name a few?

Mike Murray
Mike Murray
April 9, 2017 7:39 pm

“Christian, n.: one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely inspired book admirably suited to the spiritual needs of his neighbor.”
― Ambrose Bierce