Originally Posted at Free Market Shooter; Authored by Yung Nixon
Representative Frederica Wilson’s brazen lies about other people and their tragedies is not what this article is for. We know she lied, we know she is classless with her eavesdropping on personal condolence calls. But that won’t stop the left from having and eating their spoilt cake.
The left will celebrate Wilson anyway, because she’s intersectional or unalike the founding fathers or whatever. They happily treat her as an underrepresented puppet paraded around to distract voters from centuries of overt, systematic, Democrat racism. Wilson is an oppressed minority, you see, in a country she passes laws for…
So let the left celebrate, as enthusiastically as first class passengers on the Titanic applauded their own extravagance, moments before sudden catastrophe. But this article is not about Democrats crashing into an iceberg and losing relevance.
This article is about big hats and the people who wear them.
I love me a good cowboy hat.
Cowboy hats are pure Americana from yesteryear which still enjoy practical daily wear and stylish varieties. Men and women alike wear these hats, and for good reason. They’re tony-the-tiger-tier grrrrreeeeaaaat! And as newly minted rockstar Frederica Wilson teaches us — you can even bedazzle them!
Lately, two major players in cultural politics are becoming renowned for their cowboy hats.
First, there’s conservative Wisconsinite Sheriff Clarke:
He’s not very popular among lefties. Probably because he’s black, handsome, patriotic, and thinks just as poorly of his critics. He also despises BLM activists.
So the left hates him.
I present three tweets, first from Oliver Willis, Senior Writer at ‘wannabe-Breitbart’ Shareblue:
Oliver, if you’re reading this, please change your shirt, expression, and pose away from a storm shelter. We all hope you can do better. Your current pic looks like you’re about to hide in your storm shelter, bottle your own farts, and act nothing like Superman despite wearing the tee. I like your tee though.
Second we have Joe Berkowitz, culture writer at FastCo, who will probably delete this tweet after he’s told to book burn delete tweets peddling the failed Russia-conspiracy hook. Cultural expert indeed…
If you’re wondering both of Joe’s profile pictures are taken from a rightward 3/4 angle, it’s because the other side looks like this:
Now, I wouldn’t typically attack someone for their looks, but he’s already given me permission to tell him to fuck right off forever:
Ah, so Ben Shapiro makes a tweet about Hollywood, mentioning no president or politician ever. And what does Joe do? He immediately makes it about Bill Clinton versus Donald Trump. How progressive!
Honestly, whatever.
But last and not least, there’s David Lazarus, a consumer columnist for the Los Angeles Times who forced his follows to consume the same bad joke twice:
Sheriff David Clarke backing out of a role in the Trump administration is a setback for funny-hat-wearers everywhere
— David Lazarus (@Davidlaz) June 19, 2017
In setback for funny hat wearers, Milwaukee County Sheriff David Clarke has resigned https://t.co/0LI5RFdRkL
— David Lazarus (@Davidlaz) August 31, 2017
I wish my raised middle finger were a consumable, so that Lazarus could wax poetic about it. Clearly the only setback for ‘funny hat wearers’ is being conservative. Just ask Lady Gaga what I mean.
And as a bonus, and because I just love hats and want to get to it, here’s a totally reasonable tweet from a far left religious writer Jack Jenkins at ThinkProgress:
Now to the hats!
Because lefty narratives judge on appearance, and not character, we have this gem from esquire:
Big hat enthusiast Sheriff David Clarke attacks Frederica Wilson for her big hat https://t.co/8yzYBCiQLw pic.twitter.com/vpDdCR5Zcy
— Esquire (@esquire) October 20, 2017
You see, women in legislative positions wearing bedazzled rodeo hats are totally indistinguishable from armed Wisconsinite Sheriffs. Such an apt comparison! And therefore it’s ironic and newsworthy that Esquire make such a crude comparison.
Kristen is a senior writer for Gizmodo. Gizmodo is a blog, just like this one. So really she’s just a verified liberal™ with a thing for spurious hat ladies.
But she has a point, the silver lining of Trump’s latest debacle the latest coordinated leftie smear is hats.
Why are hats the silver lining?
Hats, be them pussy caps or bedazzled rancher-wife getups, are costumes. The leftist has not yet realized their weakness lies in their presentation. The frothy race-baiting diatribes are cringe enough, and if you add a silly hat, you get this:
Or this:
Or even, dare I post it, this:
A hat is a gamble. If done right, you look glamorous and cool. If done wrong, even if at first exciting or novel, you end up looking like a fool. Leftists have thrown all their eggs into a single like-minded basket. The genuinely believe all their colorful pomp and glitzy headdresses will attract voters.
So the silver lining is to encourage them. Let them walk farther down the narrow path until they realize they’ve walked to a cliff.
And when voters go to pull levers in 2018, they’ll wonder what, exactly the left can offer. Besides great hats.
Just wanted Stucky to see this……..
[img[/img]
Well, the ‘toon is better than the article … WTF is his point?
Hey, is that a thermite cloud hovering near the building?
The article is about Nosebergs bitching about ass-hats with big hats.
‘Cuz air is free, ya know….
Hats, that’s it. What a waste of time reading this.
I’ve been thinking about getting a sombrero. Not a little one – a giant sombrero. I just don’t want to get knifed. Is it safe? El Coyote?
I’ve heard lots of gold piping and dingle-balls dangling off the brim assure safe passage from El Diablo.
You’ll probably still get shanked if you walk in a restaurant or in front of Home Depot, though.
Sure, haven’t you seen Three Amigos?
I want to know how big Frederica’s hat closet is. Does she rent a storage locker? Does her hat collection have it’s own curator?
No, it has its own exterminator to remove the cootie from the hats after she wears them. LOL!!
Yesterday’s original response by the maid hatter in which she told us that her mother had told her about dogs barking at the moon or some such drivel was truly interesting. I wonder what brought that on? Her hat size to small and squeezing her brain? Does anyone have the youtube clip?
Found it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9eCfDMm08GU
As a woman, I find those ridiculous vag hats pathetic. So women can parade around with felt vaginas on their heads and it’s ok, but if a bunch of men were to walk around with giant cock and balls strapped to their noggins women would burst into flames and start screaming for their arrest. Dumb asses.
LOL. Agree.
Yeah, whatever. Any hat, unless functional – e.g. keeping your head and ears warm, the sun out of your eyes, or your skull undamaged – is pretty damn silly, if you ask me.
Anyone choosing to wear a hat and then condemning others
for wearing a hat is a hypocrite.
BTW, I have met Clarke, and he is a really tall man. Also, he
is polite and sweet even. Maybe his hat protects a growing
bald spot? His wife is a blond. That last is a meaningless aside.
edit add: realestatepup’s comment is laugh out loud funny.
Aside from the hat, her ongoing comments and the medias responses, are a reflection of the boldness the left is exhibiting in attacking the sacred traditions we hold (or held) as a country. They’re doubling and tripling down after General Kelly’s comments reveal their contempt for the military and fly over Americans everywhere.
Yes, I said sacred, as I am offended at how the neocons flaunt needless wars at every turn, but the men who put their lives on the line and sometimes pay the ultimate sacrifice will always have my honor and respect; even more so, those families who are left behind.
This bleeds over into the NFL players who take a knee and disrespect the flag. Yes, there are a lot of things I don’t like about those running the country, but encouraging the disrespectful actions of the pampered players will only hasten the slide into chaos; something Soros and Antifa are committed to and I oppose wholeheartedly.
It’s a fine line to walk in supporting our country but resisting an over reaching government, but something we must carefully think through, lest we end up siding with those who are trying to destroy us.
Great examples of “all hat, no cattle” from the left. They couldn’t keep a cow alive for over a week under good circumstances, anyway.
Also, it doesn’t really matter how your hat looks if there’s nothing in it.
All of these fragile pink people tears because they are mad that a Black woman isn’t afraid of them. Doesn’t care about them being in their feelings. Awww