WASHINGTON, D.C. — The White House National Climate Task Force reported today that NASA scientists have discovered a mysterious spike in global warming every year between June and August.
“We’re completely stumped,” said Bob McMahon, White House National Climate Task Force spokesman. “Our satellite data confirms global warming keeps happening in America during these same months, almost like clockwork. Even stranger, global warming seems to hit South America in different months. Bizarre.”
Mr. McMahon went on to detail evidence of a massive rise in temperature occurring every year between the months of June and August, noting that in some places temperatures even reach over 100 degrees. “This year’s global warming is shaping up to be just as hot as last year’s,” said Mr. McMahon. “We don’t know why climate change strikes during these months, but we suspect it’s all the extra carbon emissions from people using air conditioning.”
Despite the compelling evidence, some scientists still disputed Mr. McMahon’s findings. “If the globe gets so hot every August, why am I sitting here wearing a sweater?” asked climate scientist Rachel Evanson. “And why am I having my husband carry around an extra coat and scarf? Ugh, it’s freezing in here.”
At publishing time, the Climate Task Force had decided to take action by making Google Maps tell people it’s really hot outside whenever they ask for directions.
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Notice all weather people now use “feel like” temps or “heat index” to make it more foreboding and push the climate change bullshit.
Those metrics are not subjective and if you live in a place where they can mean 20-30 degrees difference, you will understand how helpful they can be.
Climate change is not real.
Where I live in the far north “feel like” temps or “heat index” and wind chill factors predict another ice age every January and February!
The JACKOFFdemocrat reading the newz for cnn looks pained.
Almost as if the lie is burning a hole in his head.
Central KY has had a very mild summer so far, nicest temps I can remember in a long, long time.
Same here in W TN and it is wetter than I can remember in my 40 years in the area.
SW Ohio and another year where any moron can grow tomatoes. raines every 2-3 days and mid 80’s temps for like 6 weeks.
My tomatoes are splitting from all the rain and they rot before ripening. Worst year ever for them for me. Squash and cucumbers love it though.
I miss my farm.
Same in N. Central GA as well.
Here in upstate NY I haven’t run my AC at all this year. Normally I run it pretty solid mid June through mid September.
I might wish for a bit less rain so I could get the north forty mowed.
The 80-year-olds around Arkansas will be quick to tell you they can remember 3 hotter years than this one.
Funny how that works in the Northern Hemisphere. Temps probably spike every year between December and February in the Southern Hemisphere. It’s called Summer.
The recent successful search for Shackleton’s ship lying deep in frigid Antarctic waters concluded in February, 2022 just as the short “summer” there was ending. The project failed in 2019 because they ran out of time-staying even another day longer could have meant disaster-just like it did for Shackleton. The search was pulled off through the use of a modern icebreaker owned by South Africa. The underwater rovers used to locate the ship faced immense obstacles. One such rover form the 2019 search never was found.
Call me when the temps spike between Jan.1st and the end of March. By spike I mean summer temps.
If anything, winters are going to get increasingly colder during a solar minimum, but what do I know. I guess you can HAARP up some high temps if you were TPTB.
DEW you think?
I certainly DEW.
Precisely, BL
Watch out, or Greta will start wagging her finger at all the posters here.
This has been a tough August down here in the Republic.
We had the highest temperature here since the other global warming event in 1964.
Proof that the government has been PURPOSELY causing extreme weather for decades. https://2009-2017.state.gov/t/isn/4783.htm and also,,, https://www.carnegiecouncil.org/media/series/100-for-100/environmental-war
Global Warming Mysteriously Spikes Every Year Between June And August, Experts Say….but only in the northern hemisphere, the real proof is it spikes in January and February in the southern hemisphere for some reason also!
(sarc)
Some dissenting climate scientist have referred to this process in both the northern and southern hemisphere as a thing called “Summer” even though they happen at different times of the year mysteriously 6 months apart!
The mainstream Climate scientist have labeled these people as science quacks.
Climate Change fanatics should be the first ones rounded up in Trumps next term and sent to re-education camps for terrorists…..Guantanamo.
The men in government will not stop lying to you until they are hanging by ropes from lamp posts and overpasses….