Ron Paul Tells Fans He Is Sorry He Couldn’t Do More As He Seals Up His Bunker

Via The Babylon Bee

LAKE JACKSON, TX – Libertarian demigod Ron Paul apologized to his supporters on Wednesday as he sealed himself up in an underground bunker to weather the collapse of the American dollar.

“I did the best I could,” said the former congressional representative. “Now please stand aside or the vault door will grind you to death in its massive gears.”

“Please, Mr. Paul! Don’t abandon us now!” implored a half-baked libertarian. “If you just help us get this petition signed – ”

“Sorry, fella,’ no can do! Petitions play into a flawed system!” he said as he kicked the man back into a throng of fans. “I’ll remember you when it’s time to rebuild!”

The vault door sealed with a hiss as it pressurized itself against a failing economy. Directionless libertarians then wandered the grounds, unsure what to do with themselves.

The events of the day were recorded in a bevy of postings on the incredibly popular social media platform Parler.

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6 Comments
AKJOHN
AKJOHN
October 25, 2023 3:34 pm

Ron Paul is one of the few really good people that got involved with politics. Imagine the greatness of the USA if he made it to president.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  AKJOHN
October 25, 2023 3:58 pm

The Deep State would have Kennedyed him. Is that a word? Overthecliff

Bulldog
Bulldog
  Anonymous
October 25, 2023 5:42 pm

Good people not needed, do not apply.

Anonymous
Anonymous
October 25, 2023 6:04 pm

The lighter side of the collapse.

Anonymous
Anonymous
October 25, 2023 8:56 pm

Let the comments of the day on TBP be recorded in postings on the incredibly popular platform Parler . .
into perpetuity

Hahahaha . .
ahhhh . . . Shit

Anonymous
Anonymous
October 26, 2023 2:23 am

“You are being attacked daily by criminals who have the blessing of the elites. Without saying so, for fear of a united backlash, they are to show you that you are a slave, that your nation is no more, that being an American is equal to being nothing.”
https://tldavis.substack.com/p/the-late-hour-of-our-republic?