Fun and Games

Guest Post by Jim Kunstler

How many of you were wondering, as I was, what the suddenly former New York Attorney General, Mr. Schneiderman, might have looked like in a leather bondage get-up with a ball-gag stuffed in his face? Not the preferred courtroom attire, of course, and a less appetizing image of justice than, say, a blindfolded, half-naked lady holding a sword in one hand and a scale in the other. But that’s how our boy rolled, even while heaping censorious opprobrium (and indictments!) on other big shot alpha dogs for defiling the honor of women.

I sense that with Schneiderman we’ve reached the zenith in this comic phase of American cultural collapse. The same week, Vanity Fair Magazine ran this item about the pop star Rihanna:

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Rihanna’s lingerie collection will drop on Friday [today], and there’s one very special addition that is making people lose their minds: her line, Savage x Fenty will feature handcuffs. [Fenty is Ms. Rihanna’s surname.] Just days after she reimagined the Pope at the Met Gala, Rihanna is reminding us that this is still her week. She told Vogue that it was only natural that Fenty Beauty, which launched last fall, feature a lingerie line for women who want to express agency over their own looks and bodies…. ‘Women should be wearing lingerie for their damn selves,’ Rihanna [told Vogue]. I want people to wear Savage x Fenty and think, I’m a bad bitch.’

Well, handcuffs are fashion accessories for entering prison… and the Marquis deSade did pen much of his personal philosophy in prison… and the women’s penitentiaries are full of bad bitches… so therefore let America celebrate incarceration and sadism! And especially women expressing their personal agency by advertising themselves as… evil? Apparently, a fellow such as Mr. Schneiderman, an avatar of justice, would naturally wish to strike a blow against evil. Thus, beset by one bad bitch after another, he laid the blows of righteous judgment upon the women in his life…!

Forgive me here. I’m trying to imagine how the proverbial Man From Mars might interpret doings in America these days from reading our popular press. Frankly, the part I like best is “reimagining the Pope,” as though it was a great feat of innovation, akin to one of the triumphs of Elon Musk, or Innocent III’s rewrite of cannon law — when it was just an act of dress-up. The Met Gala, by the way, an annual costume party thrown by New York’s Metropolitan Museum of Art, proclaimed its theme this year as “Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination” — an invitation, if there ever was one, to mingle the sacred and the profane.

The Martian in me sees America turning into something like a Fellini movie, a panorama of fabulous excess and sinister fantasy, with the more malign forces of commerce propelling the garbage barge to ever darker extremes at the edge of a flat earth. On one part of the edge stands President Trump, all Greatness and little goodness; and on the other edge stand characters like Eric Schneiderman and Harvey Weinstein, deposed champions of social justice — now cultural blood-brothers in the Sexual Predators Hall of Infamy. Mr. Schneiderman was all set to drag Mr. Weinstein over, figuratively speaking, several miles of broken glass and old Gillette blue blades in the state courts, and now it looks like the former NY AG himself may submit to a death of a thousand cuts by civil litigation, or maybe even a trip to one of his old criminal courtrooms, if the ever-vengeful Governor Andrew Cuomo has his wicked way.

If America were an X-rated billiard parlor, I’d think it had run the table on political sex stories, with nothing but the eight-ball of doom left on the table, and a wrathful deity — the Pope’s boss, shall we say — standing there chalking up his cue stick. When he sinks that last shot, a new game will get underway. I believe it will have to do with financial markets and currencies, and a lot more will hang on the outcome. The break itself should be a doozy — all those colored balls banging into each other and dropping into oblivion.

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17 Comments
hardscrabble farmer
hardscrabble farmer
May 11, 2018 9:57 am

Fellini movies had a sense of humor in them, the ‘kwa is a lot more like a Rob Zombie flick.

Mousanony
Mousanony
  hardscrabble farmer
May 11, 2018 10:20 am

Turning Lady Liberty into Living Dead Girl?

Wait, wrong Zombie. Well, either way.

Martin brundlefly
Martin brundlefly
  hardscrabble farmer
May 11, 2018 11:56 am

More like a lucio fulci movie

RiNS
RiNS
May 11, 2018 10:55 am

He writes..

…. I’d think it had run the table on political sex stories, with nothing but the eight-ball of doom left on the table, and a wrathful deity…

One of the best essays Kunstler has written in quite some time. The imagery at end sums up all that is the present day. Gawd chaulking a cue…

[imgcomment image[/img]

Eight ball in the Corner Pocket.

The Rob Zombie song alluded to by HSF is apropos to situation seeing as these days the Light shining from Lady Liberty does not verge to farce but rather to the sublime.

suzanna
suzanna
May 11, 2018 11:02 am

Ah, poetic justice for some of these “bad boys.”

And Rihanna? Forget paying $ for some (I imagine) velvet handcuffs.
Just use a couple of old soft scarves, men love that stuff, (younger men)
but women don’t. LOL

JHK, clever article!

whiskey tango foxtrot
whiskey tango foxtrot
May 11, 2018 11:17 am

For over 40 years they’ve been telling me black is beautiful and I still ain’t seein’ it.

Martin brundlefly
Martin brundlefly
  whiskey tango foxtrot
May 11, 2018 11:58 am

You aint seen my truck.

None Ya Biz
None Ya Biz
  Martin brundlefly
May 11, 2018 10:17 pm

Or my motorcycle. 🙂

Alfred1860
Alfred1860
  whiskey tango foxtrot
May 11, 2018 12:51 pm

I understand that some men are only generally only physically attracted to females of their own race (or only certain races), but IMO the the only races that just don’t cut it at all are Kalahari Bushmen and Australian Aborigines – they are objectively ugly.

At my local market a Somali family sells samosas (a savoury triangular Indian pastry filled with various things) and one of their daughters is one of the most beautiful humans I’ve ever seen, her face is flawless. I was in line there one day several months after she’d left town to go to university, and this old guy in line ahead of me goes up to the counter and says to her brother “I’m from ____, but my two teenage nephews told me that I had to come here because the most beautiful girl in the world worked here”. The old guy wasn’t being creepy, but the brother was pretty uncomfortable and told him she wasn’t there anymore.

She closest to her I’ve ever seen would be Lorraine Pascale, and if you tell me you don’t find her attractive you may want to consider that you’re gay.

Stucky
Stucky
  Alfred1860
May 11, 2018 1:05 pm

Lorraine Pascale??

[imgcomment image[/img]

No hair.
No meat.
No tits.
Too dark.

Ugh!! Oh well, I guess that makes me a homo.

Alfred1860
Alfred1860
  Stucky
May 11, 2018 3:01 pm

That’s the worst pic of her you could find and you know it!

wtf
wtf
  Alfred1860
May 11, 2018 3:32 pm

Were I gay I suppose I’d deal with it. But I find the insinuation passive aggressive and somewhat childish; both traits are hallmarks of the left. As I’m not seeing the beauty in the black race that you find so appealing I wish you your fill. Knock yourself out brother.

Wip
Wip
May 11, 2018 12:23 pm

I couldn’t get past the first sentence, too faggotty.

Anonymous
Anonymous
May 11, 2018 12:58 pm

Using a ‘future historian’ or ‘man from another planet’ is a stupid ploy to inject an artificial authority into his critique of current events. A future historian would definitely agree with me.
EC

jimmieoakland
jimmieoakland
May 11, 2018 1:11 pm

I don’t think we’ve reached the zenith of our cultural collapse quite yet. I’m still waiting for the affordable sex robots and vomitoriums to make their appearance.

james the deplorable wanderer
james the deplorable wanderer
May 11, 2018 1:21 pm

“… and vomitoriums …”
Don’t we have those already? aren’t they called vegan restaurants?