Candidates Propose Changes To Fix Flaw In Constitution That Allows Republicans To Be Elected

Via The Babylon Bee

WASHINGTON, D.C.—A number of Democrats have proposed changes to the structure of government that they think would help them win, such as lowering the voting age to 16, abolishing the Electoral College, packing the Supreme Court, and changing how Senate seats are allocated. Now, though, some of the Democratic presidential hopefuls are attacking the heart of the matter: what they call an “outdated Constitution” that sometimes “allows Republicans to be elected.”

“The election of Trump exposed a fundamental flaw in the Constitution,” Senator Elizabeth Warren said at a campaign rally. “Everyone said Hillary was supposed to win, but she didn’t. And we’re afraid that in the future, maybe Democrats won’t win again. We can’t allow that.”

Warren and numerous other Democrats have proposed an amendment to the Constitution that will state that only Democrats are allowed to win elections, a proposal they say will increase election “fairness.”

“When I think about someone other than a Democrat being elected,” said Senator Cory Booker, “it makes me so mad.” He then raised his fists and shook them, a gesture indicating he was mad. Candidate Beto O’Rourke also spoke out for the proposed amendment, though all he got out was, “It’s a great–” before skateboarding into a tree and quickly fleeing the scene of the incident.

None of the candidates have explained how they propose to get two-thirds of the states to agree with this amendment, though this has led them to point out another flaw with the Constitution: that it’s “way too hard to change when you suddenly think you have a much better idea.”

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18 Comments
Dutchman
Dutchman
March 20, 2019 4:17 pm

In seriousness – if we (all US Citizens) are supporting this country – shouldn’t be like a corporation – where we vote our shares? I this case our share is the $amount$ of taxes paid. You pay $10,000 in Federal Tax – you get 10,000 votes in Federal Elections. You pay no taxes – you have not contributed – you get zero votes. You don’t even need an ID – just a copy of your W-2.

I’m for going back to the original concept where only landowners vote.

Neuday
Neuday
  Dutchman
March 20, 2019 5:00 pm

SpicnNi66ers don’t own land therefore you’re hitler.

This is not about fairness or logic or democracy. This is about gibsmedat. Nothing more, nothing less.

Dutchman
Dutchman
  Neuday
March 20, 2019 6:01 pm

I’m home today – very bad cold. You should see the ‘fantasy’ commercials: Real Estate ad’s where some nigger is pulling up a sold sign on a $750,000 suburban home – with a white wife. Then too, there’s restaurant and pizza commercials with a nigger and a good looking white woman.

Harvey
Harvey
  Dutchman
March 20, 2019 8:05 pm

Do the commercials show the Oreo kids?

Dutchman
Dutchman
  Harvey
March 20, 2019 9:07 pm

Not yet.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  Dutchman
March 20, 2019 5:34 pm

The level of your enslavement should NOT be a criteria for your voting shares. Sorry, it is the duty of every American to keep as much money in their own hands as possible. Money in the hands of government only makes things worse for us all.

As always, take away the government’s power over us, our money, our economy, our freedoms, our rights, our property, etc. and most if not all of the problems go away….most importantly the problem of crony capitalists purchasing that power and control for their own benefit.

Harvey
Harvey
  Dutchman
March 20, 2019 8:17 pm

How about having our “shares” be proportional to the sum of the years since each of us-or our ancestors-arrived in what became the United States? Since mine go back to mid-17th century that works for me! Throw in taxes paid and maybe even years served in the military.

Subtract for certain government payments, such as welfare, food stamps, EITC.

In other words, who gets to call the shots? The givers or the takers?

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Dutchman
March 21, 2019 7:44 pm

Corporations are all about economics. Government isn’t just about economics, that’s only a small part of it. It wouldn’t make sense for bigger economic contributors to have more say in ethical issues such as voting age, gun laws, etc.

Donkey
Donkey
March 20, 2019 4:24 pm

Shit is fucked up and bullshit.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
March 20, 2019 5:39 pm

I would favor changes that made it impossible for EITHER major party to ever win again. ONLY the current two major parties have been responsible for the war of northern aggression, the multiple economic panics of the late 1800s, the Spanish-American war, our entry into WW1, the Federal Reserve, the Income Tax, the entire Progressive movement, our provocation of Pearl Harbor and our entry into WW2, the first Great Depression, the New Deal, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, the Great Society programs, the dozen or more wars of the past 4 decades, Obamacare, HMOs, Medicare, NCLB, government monopoly schools, and so, so, so much more. No other party is to blame, yet no other party is ever given a real chance to try another approach. Doing the same thing over and over and expecting something different is the definition of insanity.

John
John
March 20, 2019 9:39 pm

Babylon Bee editors have to get their facts straight. Two-thirds of states to call a Convention of States. Three-quarter of states to ratify any amendment up to and including the dissolution of the federal government.

Overthecliff
Overthecliff
March 20, 2019 11:29 pm

They would be wasting their time. Only 20% of the elected Republicans on the national level are Republicans.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Overthecliff
March 21, 2019 12:57 am

…..and that 20% don’t know what the fuck they are doing.

SamFox
SamFox
March 21, 2019 2:12 am

“The Babylon Bee | Your Trusted Source for Christian News Satire.

https://babylonbee.com

The Babylon Bee Reviews ‘Captain Marvel’ March 6th, 2019. Politics ‘We Must Resist Trump!’ Cries Woman Whose Life Hasn’t Changed In The Slightest Since Trump Was Elected.”

The Bee’s satire sounded so much like the way fascist prog dimms think & whine they had me going. 🙂

SamFox

bob
bob
March 21, 2019 10:21 am

Liberals are retarded sheep, they lack morality and they are a waste of the human genome. And they are fit throwers who have a melt down each time they don’t get their way. Douches.

JIMSKI
JIMSKI
March 21, 2019 12:01 pm

Here is MY constitution change that is needed. For congressional and Senate reps if you can not get 50.1 % of your registered voting list to show the fuck up you loose your representation. Your seat will be assigned to a bartender who was magna cumdump for economics and will be the new boss.

What could go wrong?

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  JIMSKI
March 21, 2019 12:28 pm

In some countries, a supermajority of the voters MUST vote in order for the election to be considered valid. Here, the local criminals make sure to put tax and bond issues on the ballot in way off years to make sure that virtually nobody but the parasitic supporters will show up to vote and pass the initiative. No matter that only 13% showed up to vote.

When you do the math that only 50% of folks who are eligible, register, and only 50% of them show up to vote, and most elections these days are settled by a 51-49% margin, that means that folks are taking office with only 13% of the tacit support of the electorate. But just think what kind of message it would send if only 10% of the voters showed up for the presidential election. What kind of “mandate” could the globalist puppet ever hope to claim?