INDIANAPOLIS, IN — Former Vice President Mike Pence has ended his Presidential campaign, in what polling shows to have been the most popular move of his entire Presidential Campaign.
“Polling is through the roof on this move,” said former campaign manager Dean Ross. “We finally found the one thing Pence can do that literally one-hundred percent of Americans support — quit.”
Mr. Pence’s campaign failed to gain traction, largely due to everything Mr. Pence said and did being extremely unpopular with voters. “Pence spent the campaign presenting himself as a veteran of the D.C. swamp who would continue sending billions of taxpayer dollars to Ukraine,” said political analyst Stephen Dunning. “I’m not sure if Pence hasn’t, like, seen a poll in the past decade — or spoken to a single Republican voter? But that’s not really going to work these days.”
The announcement today of Pence suspending his campaign has finally seen a huge wave of favorability for the Pence campaign. “This is easily the best day of polling we’ve had,” said Mr. Ross. “People are going crazy for this decision. You can just feel the support.”
At publishing time, Mr. Pence had made another unbelievably popular move in announcing that he would not seek to join any ticket as Vice President.
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Fuck off democrat.
I wasn’t sure if he’d actually quit, so I checked. He has. He said “this is not my time”. That is correct. Your time is never, Church Lady.
He was a fool to think any of the courtesy people afforded Mr. Trump would translate to him. Pence had his moment to shine on Jan. 6 by delaying the election certification to allow states to examine their election results more closely and re-verify their final ballot counts. Instead he blew his moment in time to be somebody and he went all in with the swamp. Eff Pence. He won’t be missed.
So… you still think jan6 was legit?
Nope…never did…but I live in Canada where we use paper ballots and don’t use electronic voting machines but we do use Dominion tabulator machines to count the votes. As Stalin said ‘It’s not the people who vote that count, it’s the people who count the votes.”
The 3am pause in voting on election night showed the US elections are nothing more than a show, just like most western nations. Does anyone seriously believe Joe Biden got more votes than Obama or Reagan?
Not the voting, the protest. My point was that Trump and Pence were just playing their part.
you realise the tabulators can be rigged, reading ballots as 0.7 votes etc
Good riddance, traitor.
“My time isn’t now.”
Exactly you fucking traitor.
Your time was January 6th 2021.
You failed miserably.
Burn in hell.
NOT very distinguishing.
I haven’t suffered so much since Harold Stasson quit the 1968 race.
He always appears to be acting when he talks. Playing a role. That’s exactly all he does. He comes off as a cheap roadside preacher.
They all seem like that to me.
Penisce pulls out of campaign due to electional dysfunction, limp, blue and unable to spooge the masses.
hide ur chillun.
I, The Great Texas Khaan, by this decree do sentence one Mike Pence to be punished for his acts of treason. Pence shall be punished by canque for the period of 1 lunar month,
Should he manage to survive the foregoing, Pence shall perform forced hard labor for 10 years, while being deprived of any substantial shelter, aforesaid shall be carried out in the remotest part of the Gobi.
Signed and sealed this day, 28OCT2023
Khaan of Texas
In a “Caption This” segue, that photo of Pretence looks like a sad, shriveled scrotum.
buh-bye, traitor.
He should have quit the moment Tucker Carlson led him to utter the words ”not my problem”.