by Uncola via TheBurningPlatform.com
In a flurry of hectic activity, the patient was brought in for emergency surgery. She was very obese, wearing a rumpled frock the size of a red, white and blue tarp over her entire, engorged body. A photo of the Statue of Liberty stretched out on the cloth above her sagging breasts over words written in a bold font, that said: “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free”.
The doctor entered the room, arms raised, as the nurse assisted in sheathing his hands with disposable polymer gloves.
“What do we have here?” the doctor asked in a professional manner.
“Overweight female, difficulty breathing,” said the nurse. Driver’s license says she was born July 4th, 1776. Must be a misprint.”
“Well, judging by the looks of her, maybe she is over 240 years old”, replied the doctor with a sarcastic smirk. “What does her blood work show?”