WAL-MART FREAKS OF THE WEEK

1606

I don’t think there has ever in the history of the world been a matchup between hippies and bumble bees. So don’t ever say we aren’t trendsetters here…

1608

Did you ever get so high that you spend 2 hours at Walmart trying to figure out how to heat up ramen noodles in an unplugged microwave?

1607

Durable enough to toss your entire body into after you suffocate yourself. Smart move there.

1609

Is ‘Too Short” the name of your prison mama who gave who this terrible ink? You can take it from here Scotty P

1605

Look at this Walcreature Showing off that crack more than Philadelphia does the Liberty Bell.

1602

Quite the outfit you’ve got on there. It looks like someone woke you up in the middle of the night, threw you into a dark closet and told you that you have a 5k to run in 10minutes.

1604

Ohhh boy! I don’t think this is what Omi had in mind. This is all a bad, bad turn of events.

1603

Molestation with a rhyme….the best kind of molestation.

1599

Sir, that’s a chocolate ice cream swirl. Get your mind out of the gutter.

1600

It’s like Mike Tyson, except somehow it’s a worse tattoo…and less intimidating…and he doesn’t have any money. Well maybe that last part is kinda like Mike, but still, definitely no fame or a killer knockout punch.

1601

We’ve got ourselves an epic battle of “crazy hair, don’t care” over here. The dreaded ponytail is elaborate but I’m going to push my vote towards the parting of the Hulk Hogan mullet.

1598

Somehow I need you to elaborate and give me answers, without testing your nerd hypothesis on me.

1596

Yes, obviously I will concede that this is on another level of adorable. But my position remains the same: Don’t be bringing in some farm animals to Walmart. That’s not a service goat. Leave him at home.

1594

Everybody getting ready for summer? Well I mean, clearly some are more excited than others, but whoop whoop!

1595

Probably not a smart move on you girlfriend, cause “bitch better have my money” so now I’m looking at you.

1597

Mr. and Mrs. Claus look like their on a much needed vacay. Nice little trip to see the grandkids perhaps.

1593

Well isn’t that just brotastic. Listen bud, that weird semi-homosexual playaround time is fine for your frat house but Walmart is not the place for it.

1592

How you just gonnna forget pants? For real, you look like you’re about to climb into bed, not choose another weird derivative of Ranch dressing they made up like Bacon Chive Buttermilk Sour Cream Ranch….Light (although that does sound dope). Back to my point, where are your damn pants?!?!?

1591

Whhaaaaaat?!?! Where did your ass go? It’s like they forget that part while you were being built. But those are like the world’s smallest shorts. You don’t have an ass. And yet somehow they don’t cover the ass you don’t have? My mind is just not processing this mess.

1590

Hey there Linus, at some point you’re gonna have to outgrown your security blanket to operate in our society.

See more freaks at People of Wal-Mart

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5 Comments
YODA_bite me (you know who)
YODA_bite me (you know who)
May 14, 2016 10:12 am

I’ve never seen any of this weird shit at a WalMart.

IndenturedServant
IndenturedServant
May 14, 2016 12:30 pm

I’m with you YODA. I’m generally moving too fast when I’m at Walmart to get a good look at anything except for the ammo I’m looking for. I do detect numerous disturbances in the force as I’m moving through the store though.

Rob in Nova Scotia
Rob in Nova Scotia
May 14, 2016 1:12 pm

I need to walk faster….. I saw woman once, she had to be north of 250. Standing at cash in her pajamas, or maybe a bathrobe and wearing pair of slippers. I think these pictures are proof that end times are here….

She ended up waddling out of store like a Rhinoceros. Like said beast not giving a rats ass what people thought of her get up. Like wild animal everyone giving here a wide berth. That in and of itself was impressive.

Giving up is a survival strategy that is proven to work and as long as welfare and EBT gets recharged every month we can look forward to more people on parade. There can be some consolation that these folks at least look like they are buying stuff…

frederick
frederick
May 14, 2016 3:59 pm

Ohhhh my god thems some scary suckers

Billy
Billy
May 17, 2016 10:27 am

We were inspired by you to start our own version of this here in Bulgaria: http://edwardpenishands.com/the-people-of-sofia/