Go ahead, make fun of soccer. Never mind that 2 billion people will be watching it. Go ahead and tell me about “bread and circuses” …. as if you don’t have your favorite entertainment distraction. Surely — “don’t call me Shirly!!” — SOMEONE here played ute soccer, or have their own offspring-utes playing soccer …. not to mention all our overseas guests, and folks like El Burrito (go Mehico!!)
So, I actually created a Bracket Group on ESPN. It’s called “Village Idiots”, (really) and the motto is “Start the damn revolution”. You can use your SAME name as in the basketball bracket, otherwise, just create one on ESPN. It’s fast and easy. You can fill out as many brackets as you want. There’s no password. Just click the link below;
http://games.espn.go.com/world-cup-bracket-predictor/2014/en/group?groupID=40417
Just one quirk. If (and that’s a BIG if) you enter, you must choose ALL the teams for EACH round before going to the next round. That’s because, unlike basketball, not every team stays in the same group. Only the winner of a group stays in the same group, the second place team in a group goes to another group. It sounds complicated, but it’s not. Again, just complete each round in its entirety before going to the next round.
If you want to play, but you’re a Soccer Moron … here’s a little insider help for you.
First of all, do NOT judge a team according to the seedings. The seedings (and, rankings) are determined by FIFA, and it’s a complete and utter joke, trust me. So, below are the Groups, their ranking by the much more reliable Soccer Power Index (SPI), their chances of winning it all, and some Stucky commentary.
Note: The “odds” is an unusual and complicated system by oddsshark.com — about as reliable as any odds-maker out there. What you need to know: The LOWER the number (even into negative territory), the HIGHER the odds of that team winning it all.
First, here is a pictorial representation of the teams.
Teams below are listed in order of SPI ranking. The format is — (Team — SPI Ranking ——— Odds of Winning)
Group A
Brazil ………. 1 …… -400
Mexico …..… 26 ….. 900
Croatia …….. 31 ….. 800
Cameroon … 39 ….. 2500
BRAZIL — MORTAL LOCK!! Not enough that they’re the #1 team in the world, they are playing in front of wild-assed crazyfuk fans. They will get ALL the calls. Home field advantage in soccer is worth a .58 goal advantage … a HUGE number. They’re going to the FINAL game. You’re a dumbass, or fanatical fan of another team, to believe otherwise. Very many experts believe they should just give Brazil the trophy now, and be done with it.
MEXICO — Second place (the other team going to the next round) is a tossup between Mexico and Croatia. Mexico has been HISTORICALLY disappointing in the World Cup. They’ll have a big advantage over Croatia if the playing conditions are hot and humid. Croatians will have the advantage if there’s a head of lettuce growing on or near the playing field. I’m not picking Mehico to advance. I hope this pisses off El Coyote.
CROATIA – The Croats have one of soccer’s best midfielders, Luka Modric, who starts for the best team in the world, Real Madrid. The White House was built with Croatian limestones. Da boyz got stones. Pick ‘em.
CAMEROON — “Cameroon” comes from a Portuguese phrase meaning Shrimp River. It’s also Austrian for “No fucking way.”. The only ting they’re leaving Brazil with is the clap.
Group B
Spain ……..…… 3 ..….. -135
Chile ……..……. 5 …….. 225
Netherlands …. 9 ……. -400
Australia …..…. 53 ……. 3300
SPAIN — Mortal Lock. Probably the best team, top to bottom. A roster filled with All Stars. The Spanish team as currently constructed is considered one of, if not the best, national teams of all time. They won the last two Euro titles as well as the 2010 World Cup. The players can walk on water. The coach once fed an entire stadium, even though he had only 5 tacos and 2 sardines in his lunchbox.
CHILE — They are VERY long and skinny. Oh, wait …. that’s their country. Don’t underestimate this VERY good team …… except …. their star midfielder, Arturo Vidal, is just recovering from knee surgery. Without him playing very well, they’ll have a tough time taking 2nd place from the Netherlands.
NETHERLANDS — Was in the last WC final against Spain … where they played like cheap dicks. Even their own legendary player, Johan Cruyff, said they played “ugly, vulgar, hard, hermetic, hardly eye-catching, hardly football style”. Haven’t been playing great lately, getting trounced in the Euro 2012 tournament. If they can pull their dicks out of the dyke, they just might advance.
AUSTRALIA – Get some Brazilian pussy. Go home. Call it a good outing.
Group C
Colombia …..… 6 ….. -150
Ivory Coast ….. 18 ….. 400
Greece …….….. 23 ….. 400
Japan …………. 32 ….. 900
COLUMBIA —- Yet another very strong South American team. Many have Colombia as the tournament’s best underdog. Many years ago USA played Columbia in the WC. Some player scored an “own goal”. About two months after he returned to Columbia, he was murdered. Colombian players have a lot of incentive to not fuck up.
IVORY COAST — ANY of the other teams can advance to the next round. But, this team only appeared in two WCs and never advanced out of group stage. Not that it matters, but they make great soaps which float.
GREECE — 55% of the utes in Greece graduate with a four-year college degree, which is the highest rate in the world. 25% of them are unemployed and have beautiful hair. In ancient Greece, after a goal was scored, the opposing players would fuck their goalie in the ass. That’s all I know about Greek soccer.
JAPAN — I really don’t like Japs. They’re still hunting and killing whales. That wasn’t good enough for them, so now they want to kill everything in the Pacific Ocean. Plus, their women’s team beat the USA in the last WC final. Fuck Japan and their slanty eyes.
Group D
Uruguay ……. 8 ….. 180
England ……. 10 ….. 225
Italy ……..….. 13 ….. 150
Costa Rica …. 25 ….. 5000
URUGUAY — Jeezus, how many very good teams are there in SA?? But, this is a really tough group. However, they have waaay to many fuckin’ “U”s in their name. No country with that many “U”s has ever won it all. They rely on two super-duper players …. the rest of the team is rather average. They went as far as the semis in the 2010 WC, and won the 2011 COPA. They also lost to crappy teams. Which team shows up, nobody knows.
ENGLAND –— Is there a MORE historically disappointing team in the WC? Well, is there, punk? NO!! The Brits invented a word to describe their soccer teams …. WANKERS. I’m not picking them, evah.
ITALY — A historic European powerhouse. This year’s team is comprised largely with the same players from the last WC, four years ago. Translation … this team is OLD, in terms of soccer. They’ll advance, but only because Costa Rica sucks, and England Wankers always fuck up.
COSTA RICA — This country is sandwiched between Nicaragua and Panama, and yet somehow they don’t give a shit about baseball. Dumbasses. They also don’t care about soccer, and they have zero chance of advancing.
Group E
France ……..….. 7 ….. -125
Ecuador ……….11 …… 350
Switzerland …..22 ….. 250
Honduras ……. 33 ….. 3300
FRANCE — True story, google it; “French foreign intelligence services bombed Greenpeace’s ship, the Rainbow Warrior, on July 10, 1985. The ship was targeted to prevent it from interfering in French nuclear testing in the Pacific.” They BOMBED Greenpeace!! Why? Cuz the Greepeace ship had no guns. I don’t like the French. I’m not going to do a search to give you all a little tidbit. I don’t give a shit about that country. Arrogant little fuckers think swapping spit was their invention!
ECUADOR — Krist Almighty, another very good SA team. No analysis. Fuckit. I’m not picking them. Why? Cuz no way in hell will ALL South American teams advance. I gotta pick a scapegoat loser. Might as well be Ecuador. They’re used to it.
SWITZERLAND — This is the most interesting team in the entire field. German coach, several Germanic players = Germany Light. An interesting tidbit; unlike most teams, this team does not have a single “superstar”. If you like team-play, you’ll love this team. They lost only 1 of 18 games in qualifying. The Under-17 World Cup is an excellent indicator of a team’s future success. The Swiss won the 2009 Under-17 World Cup. You know who won the last World Cup? Spain. Do you know who was the only team to beat Spain? Yup, the Swiss. They’re more experienced, and better. Can they be THE Dark Horse this year? I think so. Once the USA gets booted, and should Germany falter, I will be cheering mightily for the Swiss.
HONDURAS –— Ever heard of the Soccer War? Yup. Honduras and El Salvador player three times in order to qualify for the 1970 World Cup. El Salvador won 2 of 3 games, and qualified. Honduras got to pick bananas, the people got vewy vewy angry, and fucked up a bunch of El Salvadorans via riots and general mayhem. Naturally, the Salvadoran military launched an attack against Honduras. Seems like a good response to me. The war only lasted 100 hours. However, it took another 11 fucking years for the two countries to sign a peace treaty. Ain’t that some funny shit?? Did you know they have the world’s highest murder rate? Honduras CAN advance out of group play …. but, only IF all the players are allowed to bring Glocks.
Group F
Argentina ……….. 2 .….. -400
Bosnia-Herz. ….. 14 …… 600
Nigeria ………..…. 28 ….. 800
Iran ……………….. 38 ….. 3300
ARGENTINA — South American …. fuckmedead!! … 2nd ranked team in the world …. Mortal Lock …. blah blah blah …. just pick ‘em all the way to semis.
BOSNIA-HERZ —- Amazing story that such a small and new country is so good at soccer. Did you know they have the only remaining jungle in Europe? It’s called the Perućica forest … has many trees that are 300 years old, and the forest’s vintage is stated to be 20,000 years. In some places the forest growth is almost impregnable. 10 more really truly fascinating facts about Bosnia here —- http://www.expatsblog.com/contests/799/top-10-crazy-things-about-living-in-bosnia-and-herzegovina#sthash.onfw30Kp.dpuf Pick ‘em!!
NIGERIA — here’s all you need to know … they lost last week to the USA, 2-1 … and it was much uglier for them than the score indicates. They suck Obongo dick. Also, someone from Nigeria is trying to scam you right this very moment.
IRAN — Iran???? WTF are they doing in the WC?? Good thing their first game, or any other, isn’t against Da Joos. I leave it to our own beloved ZARATHUSTRA to enlighten us on Iranian soccer. I’m betting Ahura Mazda was Player-Of-The-Year back in 24,678B.C.
Group G — The Group of Death
Germany ………. 4 …… -180
Portugal ………. 16 …… 275
United States … 17 …… 1000
Ghana …………. 24 …… 1200
GERMANY — Deutschland Uber Alles!!! Undefeated in the qualification stage ….. scoring 36 goals in 10 games ….. in the TOP 2 (or, 3) in offensive firepower ….. really, they don’t show any weaknesses at this point. Mortal Lock. Angela Merkel told the players if they lose, all of them will have to lick her pussy … after Obongo boinks her. This is a huge incentive to never lose, and that’s why I’m picking them to win it all. (Yes, I know they’re playing Brazil in Brazil.)
PORTUGAL — Just because Portugal’s national symbol is a chicken, doesn’t mean they will choke the chicken. Why? One name …. Cristiano Ronaldo …. pretty much unanimously considered the best player in the world. And the rest of the team ain’t to shabby either.
USA — this may be one of the best National Teams in a long while … young, fast, skilled, and with a World Class goalkeeper, Tim Howard . BUT, we got really FUCKED over by being placed in this group … thanks to FIFA’s totally corrupt and bullshit ranking system. If they get out of group play, I will call USA’s coach, Jurgen Klinsmann, — the great former German national player — and offer to lick his balls.
GHANA — there is no team in this year’s WC that I HATE/LOATHE/DESPISE more than Ghana … the team that knocked us out of the past two World Cups …. the last time by a last second goal in overtime. I hope half the team takes a dip in the Amazon and piranhas chew off their dicks, and the other half drinks the water and they get the shits … while playing. Not very sportsmanlike, I know. Don’t give a shit. G.E.S.
Group H
Belgium ………. 12 ….. -175
Russia ………… 15 ……. 200
South Korea … 37 ……. 750
Algeria .………..69 ……. 2800
BELGIUM —- what’s the FIRST thing you think of when Belgium is mentioned? I guarantee it’s either 1) legal drugs, 2) legal pay-for-pussy, or 3) waffles. They also have a powerful soccer team with a reputation as Giant Killers having beaten eventual World Cup winners; West Germany in 1954, Brazil in 1963, Argentina in 1982, and France in 2002. Betting against them, especially in group play, is just plain silly.
RUSSIA — Top Secret insider info what you need to know; Putin will be playing as a striker. A Mortal Lock for 2nd place. Did you know the land mass of Russia is equal to that of Pluto? Also, Russia is colder.
SOUTH KOREA — I mean, why allow Asian teams to play in the WC? It’s not like they EVER won the WC …. or EVER will. Nevertheless, I love our new Hyundai. Too bad they can’t play a similar quality of fussball. Goddamn, I love S. Korea’s president!!!! In response to criticism that the government botched rescue efforts during a ferry disaster that left more than 300 dead or missing, president Park Geun-hye announced plans to DISBAND THE COAST GUARD. Taking the bull by the horns and not ducking out?? That’s so … so …. soooo Un-Obama-ish!!!
ALGERIA — Fuckin’ Mooslims. WTF? Algeria’s national team name is the Fennec Foxes. Below is a Fennec Fox. Cuter than cute. But, using a Woman’s Method Of Choosing Teams — team colors and/or the mascot — I ask you; “Is this a mascot that could win at …. anything??” Those ears. Yikes! It looks like an animal created by the NSA. Not the worst team in the field, but absolutely zero chance of advancing.
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It seems, from what I’ve read, that some (many?) Brazilians are pretty pissed off at the COST of these games, much of it (as usual) falling on those with the least amount of money. Still … Brazil is one country I’d love to see before I croak. It looks like such a beautiful and diverse country. Breathtaking, in many cases. Check it out …
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZ2mPAMUhk8&feature=player_detailpage
And for you guys, except bb, they say Brazilian women are amongst the world’s most beautiful. I see no reason to dispute that.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=chybMnfbih0&feature=player_detailpage
Leobeer is indeed playing his prickish role with perfection, but he has a lot of competition
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At least he’s not annoying as Nonanonymous
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Or, this guy
[img]http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQziMuNtVQCjLoeKjsZOJ57hJJFt0w1i7Glq11ORbz5BQAVXbI5Dg[/img]
The above post was mostly a shameless attempt to get this thread to 300 posts.
A little more help would be appreciated.
BRAZIL vs COLOMBIA ——— That Brazil has not been playing particularly well is an understatement. They were EXTREMELY fortunate to get past Chile. How much longer will this fucking charade continue?? The Amazon today will overflow with the tears of millions of suicidal Brazilians. Go Colombia!!!
GERMANY vs FRANCE
The Germans have a much more potent offense than the Frogs. The Frogs have no resistance. In other words … just like WWII. Auf Wiedersehen Frösche
The French will run around like chickens with their heads cut off
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One can almost taste the superiority of the German team
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Holy Fucking Hypocritical Horse Shit, Batman!!
The German-French game opened with some goddamned announcement against R-A-Y-C-C-I-S-M!!!
Europeans for rayciss harmony ….. that’s like Lions For Vegetarianism.
Y’all must be celebrating Germany’s victory …… there have been 6 posts in the past 2.5 hours.
I wonder if we’ll ever see Frenchie again.
GO COLOMBIA!!!
i failed to follow El Doggy’s rules. the sexy mulatta has the remote. she is only checking the score, 1-0 Brasil.
Brazil Monkeys, 2 ——– Colombia 1
The first half of that game had ZERO entertainment value.
This game was basically 22 men flopping. Absolutely pathetic. Neymar would fall down if he ran into a butterfly.
Brazil scored 2 goals on set pieces …. and MAJOR Colombian fuckups. The first was a corner-kick and the Colombian player flat out forgot to check his man …. I guess he thought watching the ball was more fun. The second goal was off a free kick … from 15 yards or more OUTSIDE the penalty area …. and a major major major goalie fuckup.
Colombia scored a goal that was called off due to off-sides. A replay showed that the TIP of a Colombian player’s shoe was over this imaginary line. Technically, yes, he was off sides. But …. THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY the linesman sees that in real time!!! I hope the payoff was worth it …. he’ll probably be driving a new Mercedes next week.
The refs made several shitty calls, several missed calls. Horror.
Those Brit announcers just suck diseased wanker dick. SHUT THE FUCK UP!! No one gives a flying fuck about your constant babbling and utterly worthless “stats” from 30 fucking years ago.
I have NEVER seen such a lucky and markedly mediocre #1 team. Brazil is fraudulent.
.
I am glad that 11 Krauts will soon crush the Hopes and Dreams of 200 million Brazilians.
— may their men turn to alcoholism and diseased livers
— may their women weep and tear their clothes and turn to prostitution
— may their children (190,000,000 of them) be psychologically damaged and turn away from soccer forever
.
“Yea, Oh Lawd, let thy hatred for Brazil consume thy Holy Glory. I pray thee, let Brazil turn into desolate wasteland for generation upon generation. And please smite Neymar’s back with boils and sores that he may not playeth against they Holy People, the Germans. In Jeebus’ name, Amen.”
“And please smite Neymar’s back with boils and sores that he may not playeth against they Holy People, the Germans.” ————— me
About three hours later ….
“Neymar has been ruled out of the World Cup after Brazil’s team doctor confirmed he suffered a broken vertebra late in Friday’s quarterfinal victory against Colombia.”
———- http://www.espnfc.us/fifa-world-cup/story/1932881/neymar-stretchered-off-in-brazil-win
I hope you curs can make the connection.
In case you can’t ……. when Stucky prays, shit happens!!! (In other words, do not fuck wif me.)
Brazil will be without it’s two best players …. (the team captain got a 2nd yellow card and will miss the game against the Germans.) Someone, quick, ship 5,000 tons of Kleenex to Brazil. They’re already making excuses …. wah, wah, wah!! Germany in a Schnitzel-walk.
That was very funny Stucky.
The first half of the game had ZERO entertainment value ? We must have been watching 2 different games. I saw Brazil as a much improved team in the first half that was applying a lot of pressure on Colombia.
Both games were great football. I found the Brazil game the better of the two and thought the Germany game lacked intensity. And that only proves the theory that you enjoy the game more if your team is winning.
I hear the new ball is responsible for so many goals this WC. Please post more pics. (Please?)
My daughter says she hates soccer. I tell her the English commentators could kill a porn movie.
The Spanish announcers aren’t fucking around too much, it’s more like: and Leobeer passes to Stucky, Stucky looks left, a high kick with his left leg aaaaaand the ball is frustrated in its attempt at a romantic reunion with the net…
Meanwhile, the English couldn’t add color to SSS’ game.
Leo — imho, there were just very few scoring opportunities in the first half, most of the action was in midfield, and Lord God Almighty … the FLOPPING was just unbelievable. I think even the dumbass Brit announcers mentioned the high number of fouls and the ridicules falling down episodes. I didn’t particularly like the German-France game …. just the outcome. I hope today’s games are better.
El Coyote — my dad actually listens to the Spanish station …. says The Wankers are too annoying, and stupid. I COULD turn the sound off … BUT not hearing the crowd makes it boring. Sometimes I also watch the Spanish station, but it gets frustrating … they keep saying “peeLOta” or something like that, and I wish I knew what the fuck that meant.
Belgium – Argentina ——— Who the hell knows?? Should be a great game, either team can win it, both are sound on BOTH sides of the ball, and I like the players on both sides. Messi and Robben are both likeable superstars. I actually don’t have a preference. But, if you put a gun to my head, I’d pick the Waffle Guys …. because I think Argentina is the slightly better team, and I prefer my Krauts have an easier road to the Final Victory.
Netherlands – Costa Rica ——– I won’t write off Costa Rica too quickly. Americans like underdogs, right? So, yeah, I’m gonna cheer for Costa Rica the rest of the way … except when they meet Germany. What a COOL storyline that would be …. little Costa Rica beating up the Big Dogs!! Sadly, I just don’t see it happening. Little Butler couldn’t beat Duke in the NCAA finals a few years ago … although they came damn close. Costa Rica’s magical mystery tour will come to an end today …. the Netherlands just have too many weapons.
I’ve enjoyed this post, Stuck, even though I’m not a soccer fan. Nice spank down on Leo. The dude lives in Thailand, parts of which are literal paradise on earth. Beats the hell out of NJ, but then an Austrian can be happy anywhere.
watching the fireworks….
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AWD
Did you know Leobeer is an annoying little prick? But, he’s a very good sport about it, and I enjoy his input.
You and millions of other Americans could care less about this every-four-year-spectacle. I really thought soccer would turn the corner when in the late 70’s the NY Cosmos brought on Pele, Carlos Alberto (super Brazilian defender) Beckenbauer, Chinaglia (Italian superstar) and other world-class players from around the globe. Sigh. It will NEVER be a major sport in this country. There are way too many other competing sports.
HOWEVER, more fans can be attracted with a few improvements, see below. OK, I know Olberman is a dickweed Obummer-nutsack-licking piece of libfuk shit …. BUT, he makes really good points. (Plus, it helps get this thread closer to 300)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=d6z7-u7EZ1g
My problem with the dumbass Brit announcers is that there is just one of them. Normally you have two. One to call the play by play and someone who once played or managed the game to give some insight into what is going on. The latter is what is lacking. Something this big and they don’t bring in a color commentator, it doesn’t make sense to me.
I’m not bitching about it because depending on which satellite system you have here you may not get the English version at all. Thankfully I don’t have to watch it with Thai announcers like I did for the 2010 World Cup.
Leobeer
In MY humble opinion, color announcer mostly RUIN the game for me. But, I get it. In television the Greatest Mortal Sin of all is …. SILENCE. So, let’s get some fucknut to constantly ramble on about the most mundane and obvious shit.
Basketball is the worst. The team is getting hammered on the boards and the dickhead says, “Well, Joe, Indiana needs to do a better job getting rebounds.” No shit, you fucking asshole!! After a missed shot, 90% of the time the color dickhead will tell you why it was a bad shot …. even if it was a good shot to take. After a made shot, 90% of the time the color dickhead will tell you why it was a good shot …. even if it was a bad shot to take. The mundane. The irrelevant. The painfully obvious. The stupid and endless fuckin clichés. Their self-righteous sense of superiority. Know-it-alls that don’t know jack shit. This is what they are good at …. the dumbing down of sports.
Who the god-damned fuck needs a fucking “analysis” of whatever-the-fuck you just saw with your very own eyes???? It’s a fucking sport, for Chrissakes, not rocket science!!!!!!
Great article — “Dumbing Down by Sports Announcers: A fan voices his irritation with the bravado, bombast, ranting, chortling and crude language that draws attention to the perpetrator not to the action.”
here —- http://www.tvquarterly.tv/tvq_37_3/media/articles/37.3_Dumbing_Down.pdf
And this is the totally worthless cocksucker who made being a totally worthless cocksucker OK in sports announcing. It’s been all downhill since.
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Stucky says:…” HOWEVER, more fans can be attracted with a few improvements,”
It’s going to take something like nude cheerleaders to turn this country around.
I agree with you about Howard Cosell. What an asshole! You are right about the dumbing down of sports but then not everyone is as intelligent as you and I. Everything is dumbed down to appeal to the masses.
I certainly don’t give a shit if the last time Belgium beat Argentina was 10 years before the birth of Christ. Or the last 3 semi-finals that the first team to score in a Brazil game lost the game. History doesn’t mean shit because the guys on the field today are different from whatever happened before. For that matter if Germany and France were to have a game next week and start the same players as yesterday do you think the result would be exactly the same, Germany 1, France 0? Could, but not likely because it is a sport and anything can happen.
As someone who watches a lot of English soccer I appreciate it when someone more knowledgeable than me analyzes the slow motion replays and gives his OPINION why there was or wasn’t a foul or points out someone’s fuck up. A good color commentator adds to the game but unfortunately there are too few good ones.
And don’t get me started on stats. They have gone way over the top.
“The stupid and endless fuckin cliches”
Nothing is worse than after the game when they stick a mic in the players face and ask him a stupid question. I think the players have every cliche in the book memorized.
Argies just kicked the pelota for the first goooooooooooool.
Go, Ticas!
Penalty kicks are a damn shitty way to end a game. Make teams play until they score. A three hour game would be fun. It would still be shorter than a boring-assed baseball game.
Poor Costa Rica. But, they deserved to lose. The Dutch hit the crossbar TWICE, and the post once. Pretty unlucky for them, damn lucky for the Ticas.
Two SA teams, and two European. Next World Cup why even bother inviting anyone else?
I expect a Germany – Argentina final. More on that on game day.
Someone mentioned that 0 – 0 game was reminiscent of a prior Gerry – Argie game.
Stucky…. You’re right about Howard Cosell. He was an annoying color man and announcer. However, he was Jewsih so Howie was OK. Lay off the Jews, Stuck, and you’ll go farther and feel better.
….. You’re right about playing out soccer games ’till some team scores. Penalty kicks are like deciding a baseball game with a home run contest when the teams are tied after nine. Or they’re like deicding a roundball game with a foul shooting contest.
Agree with you about Leobeer, too.
Good post. The number of comments prove it.
How about another one for the World Cup semi-finals and championship game.
“Good post. The number of comments prove it.” ——– IraK
Yeah …. I made about 150 of the comments. lol
.
“How about another one for the World Cup semi-finals and championship game.” ——- IraK
Why????? First, very very few TBPers give a flying fuck about the WC. Second, the semi-finals and championship game will be commented on … right here.
Violence erupts in the Costa Rican capital city, San Jose, immediately after the Netherlands won in the (soccer) shoot out.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE????? They should be deliriously ecstatic for their remarkable showing. Instead, they stab their own people. What a bunch of fucking retards.
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drunk? gang rivals? gambling debt?
why can’t they be more resigned like the Brits?
Maybe one bet his virgin sister on the outcome of the game.
does anybody have a virgin sister left after all this?
you might want to run like hell when Brasil loses.
hey, Stuckenlicht, don’t expect the refs to be on german side until the end. they won’t be given the gift of a forgotten penalty against a south american team. refs want to leave brazil alive
fuck the krauts. bunch of fucking weenies that drop on a wind gust like muller with his inbred face
by the way, fuck wordpress too
goldorack
Did Sweden qualify for the 2014 World Cup? …….ummmmm, no.
Did Sweden qualify for the 2010 World Cup? …….ummmmm, no.
Did Sweden ever win the World Cup? …….ummmmm, no.
What was Sweden’s best ever finish? ………… 2nd place ……… back in 19fucking58
Sweden eats shit.
Not surprising though, as the Swedish soccer team is composed of a bunch of fucking meatballs.
Actual Swedish team photo.
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Have a nice day.
Actual Swedish team photo.
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Nice!! At this rate I’ll get to 300 posts in no time at all.
Actual Swedish team photo.
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Actual Swedish team photo.
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Fuck. I might make it to 400 posts.
Actual Swedish team photo.
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“ …you might want to run like hell when Brasil loses.” —— El Coyote
WTF?? Are you a BRITISH beaner now? It’s BRAZIL, with a “z”, dammit.
But, you are absolutely correct about running like hell. I would NOT want to be a German fan after they beat down Brazil like a rented mule. German fans should wear “Fuck Germany” shirts, just to tip the odds of escaping with their lives intact. I fully expect riots and other acts of violence.
When a person’s ENTIRE IDENTITY is tied into a fucking soccer game, all hell will break loose when that identity is damaged. I have nothing against Brazilian people … but they have their priorities fucked up beyond belief. Living for a soccer victory is an empty putrid life.
I will be gone all day tomorrow, so I will present my brilliant analysis today.
WHO IS THE TOURNAMENT’S BEST GOALIE?
There have been some truly outstanding performances by the men with gloves.
Mexico’s goalie, Guillermo Ochoa, turned in a brilliant performance in the 0-0 draw against Brazil in the group stages. He made several close-range saves against Neymar and gave Mexico the point they needed to secure second spot in Group A. He negated the powerful Netherlands and left them scratching their heads until the 88th minute.
Nigeria’s Vincent Enyeama was similarly impressive, particularly against Bosnia-Herzegovina, before keeping his side in the tight encounter against France for longer than expected with fine saves.
Costa Rica’s Keylor Navas conceded just two goals in five games (and one of those was a penalty kick) – and frustrated the hell out of the Netherlands for 120 minutes. Costa Rica would never have gotten out of Group Stage without Navas.
USA’s Tim Howard was simply astonishing in setting a new World Cup record with 16 saves in one match … some were easy saves … some were simply spectacular.
BUT, all of those goalies will be watching the rest of the World Cup on teevee.
Germany’s Manuel Neuer …. the strapping German from European powerhouse Bayern Munich …. has been so dominant that he has come close to redefining the goalkeeper’s role itself …. such as when he virtually doubled as sweeper against Algeria in Germany’s second-round game. His coming out of the box and executing a brilliantly-timed sliding tackle in the first half is something no other goalie would even dream of trying. Why is this important? Because it has clearly influenced the German coach’s tactical decisions, allowing the coach to push his central defenders high up the field and help out in midfield. Neuer may be the most valuable player on the German team, and he is the best goalie still in the competition.
I WANT TO TALK ABOUT NEYMAR’S INJURY
First of all, I believe it was intentional. To clarify, I do NOT believe the Colombian player (Zuniga) intended to break Neymar’s back. I certainly DO believe he wanted to “get even” with Brazil’s best player. Look at the pic below. It pretty much looks intentional.
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So, why did Zuniga want to “get even”? Because Brazil mugged Colombia’s superstar (Rodriguez) for 90 fucking minutes!! Just as in baseball, if a pitcher hits a batter you pretty much can be assured the opposing pitcher will knock down their batter the next inning. It’s payback. Tough shit. Deal with it. And Brazil mugged the fuck out of Rodriguez. Brazil got what they doled out …. good on Colombia for not taking that shit forever. If anything, they should have retaliated much earlier in the game.
Brazilians are soccer THUGS. They committed 31 fouls in the Colombia game alone …. And over 90 fouls total …. and 10 yellow cards …. The MOST of any team. And they call their style of play “beautiful”?? And people say they play “exciting” soccer? BULL. FUCKING. SHIT.
From a British player ———– “”They don’t let anybody start passing the ball. They just stop the game when they think there is going to be a problem and they will go and obstruct the opposition. They should have even more yellow cards, but they get off very lightly. Yes, Thiago Silva’s booking means he is banned from the semi-final, but rightly so. Brazil foul all the time and they get away with murder.”
I’m guessing they will commit even more than 31 fouls against Germany. The refs will once again let them “get away with murder.” It’s their ONLY chance of winning …. and in Brazilian soccer, winning is everything, regardless of what it takes …. even cheating, if necessary.
CAN BRAZIL BEAT GERMANY?
Theoretically, Outer Mongolia could beat Germany on any given day. It’s the nature of sports. But to hell with “theory” …. let’s talk Realism. So, in one word —– “Nein!!”
A BBC sports announcer made this comment after the Colombia game ——– “THIS BRAZIL TEAM DO NOT BEAT YOU ON FLOW; THEY BEAT YOU ON MOMENTS. They had their two moments from set-pieces to score both their goals against Colombia, and they had no flow at all in the second half but worked like mad to stop Colombia having any either. There were constant interruptions to what was a scrappy game. Many of their millions of admirers are going to be a little bit disappointed with what they are seeing at this World Cup.”
Who are involved in most of these Brazilian “moments”? Neymar and Silva. And BOTH are out! Without them, Brazil is a very average team. Without them, I’d go as far as saying Brazil probably wouldn’t have even made it out of Group Play.
Everyone thinks the Big Loss is Neymar. Why not? The pretty boy (who gets knocked over by butterflies) is just 22 years old …… his 54 caps and 35 goals ALREADY ranks 6th in Brazilian WC history. It is a virtual unanimous consensus amongst soccer pundits that Brazil is an ordinary team without him. Regarding Neymar’s importance to his team (he carries them on his frail back), well, this graph says it all.
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How does Brazil’s coach (Scolari) replace THAT??? He can’t!! Scolari has thus far been starting with a three-man attack consisting of Fred (Flinstone?), Neymar and Hulk (stupid arrogant name). There’s an article describing Fred as the worst Brazilian striker ever to take part in a World Cup. Hulk has looked like more of a threat …. but he has yet to score. Another supposed scorer is Oscar (where’s Felix?) but has all but disappeared since a good game against Croatia.
The likely substitute for Neymar will be Willian … a talented winger …. but he hasn’t done jack-shit during his playing time in this World Cup. On the bench are Jo and Bernard. Jo was a TOTAL flop at Manchester City. Bernard plays for some team named La Selecao …. and in 13 appearances has just the 1 goal. Brazil Offense = Disarray.
THE LOSS OF SILVA MAY BE EVEN WORSE.
That’s not my opinion. It’s the opinion of several soccer pundits. If Neymar is the Orchestra, then Silva is the Conductor. Michael Jordan got all the praise and glory …. while all the beautiful assists from Scottie Pippen (and others) often went unnoticed. That what Silva does …. he makes shit happen. Silva and David Luiz have been the best central-defensive duo in the World Cup, defensively and offensively. The loss of Silva —- due to his total fucking dumbass thuggish act of bumping the Colombian goalie —- is a HUGE loss. There is no one that can replace his value to the team.
GERMANY IN A BLOWOUT
Germany is not infallible. Every team has weaknesses that can be exploited by an opponent. I define a “blowout” as a 2+ goal win. I don’t believe Brazil will even score one goal against Germany. (Unless of course the refs award some bullshit foul in the penalty area … a very real possibility ….. or take away a German goal, another real possibility.) Brazil’s best chance is to foul the fuck out of Germany, hope for some referee “help”, and maybe get that slant-eye half-blind cheating Jap bastard ref from the first game. All that aside, I wouldn’t be surprised with a 3-0 German victory.
Amazingly, these two teams have met only ONCE in World Cup play. That was the 2002 final game, which Brazil won 2-0. Hey, Brazil …….. IT’S PAYBACK TIME, BITCHEZZ!!!!
I am now fairly confident this thread will get to 300 posts. Hip! Hip! Hooooray!!!
BTW … do NOT feel sorry for Neymar. While his teammates are sweating their balls off on the field (in vain), he’s getting his balls licked by his hot girlfriend.
22 years old …. a multimillionaire ….. worshiped as a God …. and mighty fine Poontang at his disposal! Asshole!
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Watch this two or three year old crying that Neymar is out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKvh-BBDEu8&feature=player_detailpage
Brazilian society is SICK IN THE HEAD.
I don’t want to hear about “passionate fans”. I am a die-hard Indiana Hoosier basketball fan. Took my kids to Assembly Hall. They’ve watched me jumping up and down and scream and carry on when they won the National Championship in the final seconds against Syracuse. They’ve watched me scream and throw my shoe at the TV when they lost the first game against Cleveland Fuckin State. But they KNOW this is a temporary emotional outburst …. good for about half an hour.
They are IU fanatics today. But, never in a fucking million years have they acted as if the goddamn stupid game was anything other than a basically goddamn stupid game. That’s because I knew better, and I taught them well.
But, these Brazilian parents … and millions like them … yeah, they are really fucked in the head.
More crying toddlers here —- http://www.irishmirror.ie/news/weird-news/gutted-neymars-out-world-cup-3819847
ON THE OTHER HAND ………..
………. not all Brazilians are enamored by the World Cup. And you think OUR copfuks are assholes???
“The Other Side of Brazil’s World Cup” ——— (36 minutes, and very informative and well done)
Brazilian World Cup CLUSTERFUK ….. and I’m not talking about them failing to win it all.
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Brazil’s 2014 World Cup – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
As we get to the final stretch of Brazil’s 2014 World Cup Soccer Tournament the euphoria and adrenalin that the sport commands is all consuming and complete. For soccer (football) fans the world over the end-stage of the tournament is like being on steroids. It’s that exciting an engaging.
But I would like to inject a note of sobriety in this entire fixation with the game and the peripheral issues that are just as germane and salient to it. Especially, the fact that its being played in a country riddled with mass protests, demonstrations, construction site fatalities, low wages for work and late completion of playing facilities and hotels.
Did Brazil bite off more than it could chew?
Perhaps, Brazil was set up to fail judging from the negative tabloid reporting and biased press coverage in rich, Western nations. It is as if they were applauding every failure, every setback and all of the pre-tournament snafus and blunders that the Brazilian government committed.
I don’t know.
Perhaps the underlying issue is the perception by rich, European nations that soccer is “their thing” and that countries like South Africa and Brazil, emerging economies, are not equipped or suited to hold these billion dollar sporting showcase events.
If that’s the case, there is some merit here. For one thing the cost to host a tournament like the World Cup Football Tournament is prohibitive and as in the case of Brazil come at the expense of putting money in healthcare, education and job creation. So host nations must spend enormous sums of money to build new stadiums, upgrade old ones and bring hotel, airports and transportation services I line with FIFA’s demands.
So today in Brazil millions of poor and working class cannot afford the cost of a ticket to see their national team play. Brazil’s police and security units have ruthlessly cracked down on protesters and engaged in a sustained pogrom in the slum areas of Rio called Favelas.
The protesters are angry and frustrated with their national government for spending an estimated $14 billion in public funs to host the World Cup. By contrast the cost of the games is equivalent to 61% of funding for education and 30% of the cost of healthcare.
Private companies, including those in the services and construction industries, will be the main beneficiaries of this public money. Adding to this cost is the forced evictions of the poor living in the favelas (slums) and the dispossession of indigenous people from their lands to build stadiums and parking lots.
To justify this violent response, the federal government has pushed to pass legislation that would criminalize all anti”‘FIFA protests as “terrorism”, with 12 to 30 year prison sentences for those convicted.
The state has deployed more than 200,000 troops, armed with such weapons as Israeli drones, German anti”‘aircraft tanks, and rooftop missile defense systems, to protect the World Cup from protestors.
Add to this the fact that the often promised legacy of visitors, foreign investment, economic growth, modern infrastructure and the like, is not only not guaranteed but it also has been proven to be illusive and nonexistent at best. Only large multinational corporate sponsors benefit. The host country is often left holding the proverbial bag.
Look at South Africa for example. That country spent nearly $20 billion on the FIFA world cup but only recouped a measly $323 million. Of the projected 450,000 visitors that FIFA and its PR entourage said would flood to South Africa only 309,000 materialized. Economically, for South Africa the 2010 FIFA World Cup was a resounding flop.
But not only that. Many of the stadiums are now expensive white elephants — a testimony to Neroian money splurging on grandiloquent structures that are useless after one or two events. I predict that the same will happen in Brazil. President Dilma Rousseff will be left holding an empty bag with tremendous social problems.
Remember that the Sochi Winter Olympics held in Russia at a staggering cost of $51 billion, even though today 18 million Russians live in poverty and migrant workers were paid less than $2/hour to build the necessary infrastructure.
In 2022 Qatar will host the next FIFA World Cup. From published reports hundreds of migrant workers have already died working on the World Cup infrastructure. For example, over 400 Nepalese and 700 Indian workers are already among the casualties.
The conditions migrant workers are forced to work in have been compared to slavery. Robert Booth for the Guardian explains: “Workers described forced labor in 50C (122F) heat, employers who retain salaries for several months and passports making it impossible for them to leave and being denied free drinking water.
The investigation found sickness is endemic among workers living in overcrowded and insanitary conditions and hunger has been reported. Thirty Nepalese construction workers took refuge in the their country’s embassy and subsequently left the country, after they claimed they received no pay.”
The International Trade Union Confederation estimates that 12 workers will die each week and around 4,000 will have died before the 2022 FIFA World Cup starts.
Latin American journalist Eduardo Galeano put FIFA in perspective writing, “There are visible and invisible dictators. The power structure of world football is monarchical. It’s the most secret kingdom in the world. Protestors aim to drag FIFA from the shadows and into the light. If they are successful, it will leave a legacy that will last longer than the spectacle itself”.
Ah, good ole protest and agitation. But the million dollars question of if to apply to host a FIFA World Cup if you are the government of a so-called “emerging nation” is a major one. It has to do with population density and volume as well as infrastructure. FIFA needs numbers to generate big money. So no Caribbean country need apply — they simply have not reached critical mass not have the infrastructure to pull that off. Not because Kenya has great distance runners and Africa is producing some of the finest football talent on the planet makes them eligible or able to host a World Cup.
Finally, a major crime ring with possible insider information was busted. It was a $94 million crime that further tarnishes FIFA’s image and the organization as scandal prone. And on the field of play poor refereeing continues. Brazil’s superstar striker Neymar, was kneed in the back in the game against Columbia and is now out of the tournament.
In this instance, the referee failed to control the game as it got progressively rough and physical. Neymar was brought down a few times before the vicious knee kick that fractured one of his vertebrae. Had the referee taken control of the game and issued one or two yellow cards and cautioned players about too dangerous talking and the like, this might not have happened at all.
And yes, tickets to the games as cheap as $400 is way out of the reach of millions of ordinary, working class Brazilians.
http://www.opednews.com/articles/Brazil-s-2014-World-Cup–by-Michael-Roberts-Blunders_Control_Football_Games-140706-369.html
Stucky, Would it be safe to assume that you don’t like anything about Brazil? The team, the country and the people? Oh yes, the poontang is mighty fine but you are an asshole if you fuck it.
Because I am an annoying little prick and want you to think I am a big fucking prick I will stick with Brazil as my choice because now they are the underdogs.
Hosting the WC is a losing proposition and so is the Olympics. Should all governments in the world say we can’t afford it and we won’t have them anymore?
“The protesters are angry and frustrated with their national government for spending an estimated $14 billion in public funds to host the World Cup. By contrast the cost of the games is equivalent to 61% of funding for education and 30% of the cost of healthcare.” — from the article above
Are the protesters suggesting that the money is better spent on education and welfare? We know how well that works in America, don’t we?
So close, I know Stuck will get 300. Let it be a nice pic.Time for some subliminal suggestion: Tits, Stuck, big as soccer balls.
OK.
Well, I entered the search term “huge soccer tits” and the very first hit was —-“Talented brunette soccer mom with really huge tits sucks off her college student fat cock and gets penetrated rough doggy style …” Really.
Can’t use THAT one.
BUT THIS WILL DO!
#300 !!
#300 !!
#300 !!
GO GERMANY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Leobeer
First and foremost, I DESPISE Brazilian soccer. My entire life I’ve heard about how Brazilians play “beautiful soccer”. In fact, it was Pele, I believe, who first coined the phrase about soccer being a “beautiful game”. Well …. it ain’t!! They are THUGS, as I chronicled above.
I have nothing against Brazilian people ….. save for the fact that their TOTAL OBSESSION over a goddamned game is truly a SICKNESS. Again, as I wrote above.
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“Hosting the WC is a losing proposition and so is the Olympics. Should all governments in the world say we can’t afford it and we won’t have them anymore?” ——— Leobeer
I would have ZERO problems with GOVERNMENTS cancelling BOTH the Olympics and World Cup soccer. I wish they would. Now, if some PRIVATE enterprise decided to run things AND IT COST THE PEOPLE OF THE HOST COUNTRY ZERO MONIES (except for the tickets, and PERHAPS security) …. then I’m A-OK with that.
But, the way it’s set up now is that the rich and the corporations profit ….. on the backs of the very people who can’t even afford a ticket. This is bullshit. And, I believe you know that.
No — simply throwing money at every social ill doesn’t solve the problem. I also do not know if Brazilian money-for-the-poor is as wasteful and ill-used as in America, better, or worse.
But, I do suppose these Brazilian children don’t give a shit about the distinction. Their country can spend billions on white-elephant stadiums, but they won’t spend a few bucks to feed them. This, too, is bullshit. But, hey, shit from the dump is probably healthier than shit from McDonalds. Go Brazil!!
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Stucky,
Congrats on making it to 300. I think this is my 43rd comment. It’s been a pleasure to help.
No shit, many players are thugs, not just the Brazilians. Luis Suarez is a prime example.
“I have nothing against Brazilian people ….. save for the fact that their TOTAL OBSESSION over a goddamned game is truly a SICKNESS.” –Stucky
I have seen a lot of Americans get totally wrapped up in the Super Bowl. It isn’t unique to any country. Some people take sports too seriously. It’s an addiction and as with many addictions it helps them get through their pathetic lives.
Have you ever been to a situation like that last picture. The one with the kids living in poverty. Believe it or not this is the only life these kids know. They have learned to deal with it. I know someone very well whose parents harvested poppies in the Golden Triangle until the US govt forced Thailand to destroy the fields and forced the poor farmers to find something else to do. He lived the first 10 years of his life without electricity. I have never met a kinder, more polite person, ever. We look at pictures like this and feel sorry for them because we have had it so good. We couldn’t imagine living their lives for even one minute. Most of us wish we had more, most of them wish they had more. Almost all of us adapt to what we have and learn to accept it.
“Congrats on making it to 300. I think this is my 43rd comment. It’s been a pleasure to help.” —-Leo
It’s been a pleasure butting heads with you. You and El Coyote have hung in there and kept this conversation going. harry p hung in there for a while but the last post he made was that he was looking forward to me licking Klinsmann’s balls. really.
NO ONE but you two are reading this post. NO ONE. I know this because of the 98% naked German beauty posted above …. there’s even an outline of her pubes on the left side and all it got was one lousy vote …. probably yours. I could post a FULL SPREAD OPEN VAGINA picture, and no one would know, or care.
Do I sound angry? Bitter? Disillusioned? Lonely? Well, I’m not. It was fun, it really was. And we still have FOUR games to go. Shooting for 350!!!
Speaking of 4 games ………. isn’t the THIRD PLACE GAME (on Saturday) a total fucking waste of time??? Who the fuck cares? Well, maybe a team like Costa Rica, if they made it that far …. but certainly NONE of the Big Dogs take pride in finishing third. I imagine it must be a real grind for the players.
Although this year could be quite the exception. If Brazil loses today (they will), and Argentina loses tomorrow (they might), then they would play for 3rd place. Brazil would DEFINITELY want to win that game ….. BECAUSE it’s Argentina. Only recently have I read the extent these two teams hate each other. Goddamn …. if Brazil loses, their politicians might declare war on Argentina.
OK, gotta go look for a good soccer vagina pic to post.
“Have you ever been to a situation like that last picture. The one with the kids living in poverty. Believe it or not this is the only life these kids know. They have learned to deal with it.: —— Leo
I believe that was the last thing Marie Antoinette said before she lost her head. I do not believe people ever get totally acclimated to being dirt poor. Eventually the poor rise up and overthrow their masters …. for new masters.
I’ve not seem poverty to that extent. But, I was stationed in Greece from 1973 – 1974. The first day there was Orientation Day, where they told us about do’s and don’ts regarding Greek culture. I don’t recall exactly, but I believe they told us the average Greek made under $200 a month. I just remember that it was ridiculously low. Athens seemed to be relatively well off …. although every time I would take the bus to downtown Athens there was ALWAYS a beggar, or several, in tattered clothes begging us GI’s for a Drachma (about 3 cents at the time) or two. Begging for 3 cents …. wow, that was pretty eye-opening for a 19 year old kid (me). Not sure how one adapts to that. Drive 20 miles out and it was a totally different story. I still have several pictures of one-room stone huts — often just carved into the side of a hill — that littered the countryside. It was sad, really.