The Boy Who Came Back From Heaven

Number 1 Best Seller!! Da Boy who done met Jeebus! Ohhh. Ahhh. Praise de Lawd, Halleluiah!!

516 5-star reviews on Amazon!

“As I read this book very critically, I sobbed. Reading the words that Alex says gave me chills. I would recommend this book to anyone that wants to see a minuscule glimpse of heaven through the eyes of a 6 year old boy.” ——- says Denise

“Such a great book that makes you a true believer in Heaven.” —- says Lynn K Fisher
“God’s power and love for Alex and his family and anyone who chooses to have faith is truly amazing!” —— says Firsttimer
 
Why such outstanding ratings? DETAILS, baby!! I mean, what does the Bible REALLY tell us about Satan? Nuthin! What kind of clothes does he wear?  Is he buff … does he work out? What about his dental plan?  Bupkus! Who needs the Bible when the kid actually done saw de debil for himself? Here, listen up, you ignoramuses;
.
“The devil’s mouth is funny looking, with only a few moldy teeth. And I’ve never noticed any ears. His body has a human form, with two bony arms and two bony legs. He has no flesh on his body, only some moldy stuff. His robes are torn and dirty. I don’t know about the color of the skin or robes—it’s all just too scary to concentrate on these things!”
.
That’s pure Gold, baby!!
.
TWENTY THREE MILLION VIEWS!!!  Now you too can see it! Here!! Let the tears flow freely. Bask in God’s awesome love. Allow yourselves to be blessed, you heathen somsabitchezz!!

Sniffle, sniffle, whiffle, piffle. Not a dry eye in da House.

Unfortunately, it was all a big pile of bovine excrement.  He recanted his story on  a website “Pulpit and Pen” here — http://pulpitandpen.org/2015/01/13/the-boy-who-came-back-from-heaven-recants-story-rebukes-christian-retailers/

The recantation:

=============================================

An Open Letter to Lifeway and Other Sellers, Buyers, and Marketers of Heaven Tourism, by the Boy Who Did Not Come Back From Heaven.”

Please forgive the brevity, but because of my limitations I have to keep this short.

I did not die. I did not go to Heaven.

I said I went to heaven because I thought it would get me attention. When I made the claims that I did, I had never read the Bible. People have profited from lies, and continue to. They should read the Bible, which is enough. The Bible is the only source of truth. Anything written by man cannot be infallible.

It is only through repentance of your sins and a belief in Jesus as the Son of God, who died for your sins (even though he committed none of his own) so that you can be forgiven may you learn of Heaven outside of what is written in the Bible…not by reading a work of man. I want the whole world to know that the Bible is sufficient. Those who market these materials must be called to repent and hold the Bible as enough.

In Christ,

Alex Malarkey.

=============================================

Wow.  The little cocksucker has some big ballz.  He is calling on the BOOKSELLERS to repent???  I wonder if he and his blessed family will return the MILLIONS of dollars they scammed from their adoring suckers, errr, believers.  Somehow, I doubt it.

This post isn’t a slam on Christianity, per-SE. Truth or scam, the book itself proves nothing.

It is an indictment on the extreme gullibility of most Christians. They’ll believe almost anything that “glorifies” God … even if the source is extra-biblical (outside the Bible) … like this miraculous book.

Oh Lawdy, do they love their “miracles”.  “Yea, oh yea! Da Lawd saved me from this plane crash. It’s a miracle!!”, said the lone survivor of a plane crash … not in the least bit flummoxed that he is surrounded by  384 dead bodies whom God apparently couldn’t save.

One last thing; — did you notice the kid’s name? Alex Malarkey.  Malarkey!! From the ancient Greek text which means “one who is totally full of shit” … and which even survives to this day in it’s original form.  Malarkey!!  It’s almost as if Da Lawd hisself was trying to send his peeps a message. 

But, the sheep would not listen. And that sad fact really is a bunch of malarkey.

 

Author: Stucky

I'm right, you're wrong. Deal with it.

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26 Comments
bluestem
bluestem
January 17, 2015 10:39 am

Stucky, when I saw this article on another news site yesterday, I thought, ” Man, is Stucky gonna have fun with this.” To say the least I am not disappointed. John

Chicago999444
Chicago999444
January 17, 2015 11:05 am

This story sort of went under my radar, as I never have paid much attention to stories about “out of body” experiences or sightings of “heaven” in people who have been near death. I have always thought these experiences were hallucinations produced by the stresses of severe injury and illness, caused by the endorphins that flood the brain at such moments and ease the pain and terror of dying. These hallucinations are so similar from one person to the next that we can figure that they are the brain’s natural response to extreme physical distress.

Shame on the parents who exploited their kid’s natural imagination for personal gain, corrupting his morals. The kid has just learned an important lesson,but it’s not the one we want to give our kids, which is how there’s a sucker born every minute, that, in an Idiocracy like the one we now dwell in, it’s easier to make a fortune by dishonesty and exploiting stupidity and superstition, than it is through honest, productive work.

bb
bb
January 17, 2015 11:40 am

He is right about the need for repentance. No matter what some (stucky)say Christianity has been thegreatest blessing the world has ever known.For most of my life I was worse then (stucky)when it came to religion. About 5 years ago something happened. I was never the same.

Cricket
Cricket
January 17, 2015 11:44 am

The author’s last name is Malarkey…perhaps that was the first clue the story was not true?

Iska Waran
Iska Waran
January 17, 2015 11:45 am

My mom gave me a book called The Shack once that apparently was real moving to a lot of people. I couldn’t make it past the few first pages, on account of the pedestrian writing. Plus, I only read about one book per year, so I’d rather read Confederacy of Dunces again. Ignatius was a theist and I’ll listen to anyone who sells footlong hotdogs on the street from a cart he’d named “12 Inches of Paradise”.

bb
bb
January 17, 2015 11:57 am

Some Christians are gullible but just as many people have been deceived by various ideologies (Nazism , Marxism , Socialism in all its forms , naturalism , materialism , secularism in all its forms. Evolution in all its forms , the new age paganism in all it forms )just to name a few of the ideologies .They all are atheistic therefore satanic. People who say Sin is not real but you can see the results of Sin 24/7 just by watching TV .TV being the biggest deception medium in the world. It is also the biggest propaganda medium on the planet.Everyone is deceived to some degree..This includes you Stucky. You are deceived about being deceived.
Don’t worry I won’t give up on you.

Gayle
Gayle
January 17, 2015 12:55 pm

Stucky

The video you posted is not related to the book in the story. The video is about the book ” Heaven is for Real” by a different author, a book far more popular than “The Boy Who Came Back from Heaven.” I haven’t read the book you discuss, but I think some clarification is in order.

Gayle
Gayle
January 17, 2015 2:00 pm

Stucky
No it doesn’t make a real difference. If you have faith, you have it. A book about heaven is not going to make anybody a Believer.

When I was a child back in the Pleistocene era, a good friend of mine (and her family of mine) was very ill at about age 4 or 5. At the height of her illness she told her parents she could see Jesus in heaven. I don’t pretend to know what was going on, but is it possible that small children -in Whitman’s words “trailing clouds of glory” – retain the capacity to tap into the great unknown that is no longer available to us adults?

El Coyote's vision of hell
El Coyote's vision of hell
January 17, 2015 2:51 pm

Job 7:9-16 As the cloud is consumed and vanished away; so he that goes down to the grave shall come up no more. He shall return no more to his house; neither shall his place know him anymore. …Then thou scare me with dreams, and terrify me through visions: So that my soul chooses strangling, and death rather than my life. I loath it; I would not live always: let me alone; for my days are vanity.

Newspapers announce death in the headlines:
The devil knows you’re dead

It is April, and yet the season is not spring
Trees display yellow leaves.
Winter is in the air.

The sky above is like a carapace, a covering as that of a cavern
The walls are rough and jagged rock
Across from the wide river is that land of shadows

Everyone descends in darkness
Bodies drag themselves on the ground
Some are blind, others see only dimly.

The stairs are crowded with people
They have signed a compact – a treaty of lust.
Desire for glory and money
In exchange they received this life in shadows

Although they cannot see beyond the shadows.
They continue on down the steps, one runs away.
They are in constant fear and loathing.

At the bottom of the stairs a woman checks her list.
The woman is very attractive and yet repulsive,
her being is loathsome in spite of the attractiveness of her beauty.
She is evil and the fear men feel makes her laugh.

raptorman
raptorman
January 17, 2015 4:15 pm

Much like the jewish oil lamps that burned for 12 days when they had oil for but one, I recently got 30 days brushing my teeth from a tube of toothpaste that appeared completely empty. Miracles, indeed.

Llpoh
Llpoh
January 17, 2015 6:13 pm

There is a sucker born every minute.

In the US, there were tens if not hundreds of millions of them born.

Caveat emptor.

bb
bb
January 17, 2015 6:47 pm

Lloph , what do you think will happen to your soul when you DIE ?This is not a trick question.

b
b
January 17, 2015 7:40 pm

I call B.S. on the letter of apology. It is extremely unlikely that 6 yr. old could have written that apology.

El Coyote
El Coyote
January 18, 2015 1:05 am

To die, to sleep—
No more—and by a sleep to say we end
The heartache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to—’tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished! To die, to sleep.
To sleep, perchance to dream—ay, there’s the rub,
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause. There’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long life.

AWD once commented: they will not live as long as they think; I suspect he knew the truth of his own mortality. I consider the fact that I wake up every morning is indeed a miracle. No one has a lease on life, not Billy, not Stucky. As far as I know they have no pact with the prince of darkness.

I must say, my own vision of hell was the worst of the nightmares I had after I quit drinking, the scenes may have been inspired by a few horror movies but I’m sure the description of the devil woman is close, although others have reported seeing a horrible looking creature while under the influence of drugs.

ssgconway
ssgconway
January 19, 2015 2:31 pm

Lots of people are gullible, as we see every election cycle. Many follow charlatans of various stripes. ‘Respectable’ people may be unknowing slaves to the teachings of some defunct economist or they may be business people or ‘educators’ who follow the latest management/educational fad. This is simply human nature at work. Most people will fall for a fraud they are predisposed to believe, whether is is the reality of Heaven or the coming environmental demise of the world. I prefer to think in Biblical terms: We have the Law and the Prophets. Read them. There are those, like the rich man’s brothers, who would not believe even if Lazarus left Abraham’s bosom to come back from the dead to tell them. For those of us who are Christians, as others have said, the Bible is sufficient, and anyone trying to add to what it says is just selling something.

Spinolator
Spinolator
January 19, 2015 4:03 pm

In my opinion, there is certainly lots we can ask about reality and that which our senses can and cannot perceive. So, I haven’t been able to bring my self to be convinced that nothing came out of nothing bc that makes as much sense as believing some of the stuff from the other side. But yes there are some very gullible beings out there. I guess we all seek comfort one way or another, and if it helps you and hurts no one, why not?

flash
flash
January 19, 2015 4:42 pm

Without reading any comments, so my apologies for any unintentional redundancy , I have to say admitting this lie of biblical proportions took a lot of chutzpah on the kid’s part. The was no reason other his unbearable guilt and a personal goal of setting this dishonesty right God to be accomplished by admitting the lie.He could have kept quiet and continued to prosper in this falsehood.IMHO . It take some very large cojones to out oneself. Kudos to the kid.He’ll grow up to be one fine young man.
A working conscience is a good thing a Sociopath will never possess.