PORTLAND, OR—Local socialist millennial man Matthew Hatter lamented Monday that there are no concrete examples of socialism he can point to in order to have some kind of idea how it would turn out.
“If only there were other countries that have tried socialism before,” Hatter said to a friend at an ethical coffee shop, Commiebrews, Monday afternoon, after he finished his paper route. “Then, we could see if there are any pitfalls.”
Hatter said it’d be nice if there were books that covered things like world history and economics that we could read. If that were the case, Hatter said, we could abandon socialism if it looked dangerous or proceed with socialism if every country that implemented it were incredibly successful.
“Like, say some countries in South America tried socialism before and everybody starved to death,” he said. “Or if there were major superpowers who implemented socialism and then, like, 100 million people died—that would be really bad. We could look to these ‘books of history’ and decide that wouldn’t be the route for us.”
“Alas, sadly, this isn’t the case, so the country will just have to be pioneers and try socialism to see what it’s like.”
Hatter said he’s just glad that if socialism turns out to be terrible, no other country would be dumb enough to follow in our footsteps.
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I’d bet there are Liberal Arts majors right now saying this to their friends. Probably History majors too.
“Millennial Wishes There Were Some Historical Examples Of Socialism We Could Study To Have Some Idea How It Might Turn Out”
Proof positive the kiddies can sense which way the wind is blowing.
They can figure it out in a matter of minutes with YOUR HELP.
The commies are running scared.
Hence the drama.
Testing. Mark cannot post. Hmm
So all the European countries don’t work? Holland as an example. I admit to not liking open immigration as I experienced there. People didn’t go broke paying medical bills. Typical people in Holland lived like poor people do here. No car but they have a TV and a stereo. Better freebies with resulting higher taxes. The U.S. is just about there. Funny one thing that stood out about holland, people dressed better. I didn’t see people dressed like slobs as I do here. it has been a few years since I lived there. Don’t get me wrong I want as little Gov. as possible in my life.
No they don’t work. Open your fookin’ eyes.
you obviously spent a lot of time in the hash bars there.
I see stupid people…
Looking at that guy’s picture I was reminded how burned out I am on soft men, hard women and yutes. Man, I need a fucking vacation. These mutants are sapping my soul.
History and reading and stuff are so 20th century.
I know this is parody, and it IS funny, but the left has an answer for that, too. You see, none of those places that had a government murdering massive swaths of their populations, abject poverty for everyone but the politicians and politically connected, and mass starvation were practicing “real socialism”. That was an authoritarian government, and will be nothing like what real socialism will look like in the glorious future. Its mainly arrogance, mixed with a generous helping of ‘American exceptionalism’. Once these people are in charge, they will get everything right. The American exceptionalism is essentially a strain of the same mental disorder that makes so many people think America (with them in control, of course) has some divine mandate to go around reordering the world in a manner they see fit. Its the same blind arrogance that fools people into thinking that the America empire won’t suffer the same fate as every other empire in human history. The mindset is the same – American socialism, like the American empire, will succeed where all others have failed.
I had hoped that he was intelligent and was being sarcastic.
Unfortunately “socialism” is an overloaded term. What most people mean when they say it is actually communism.
A Danish man had a dream to escape socialism in the 1960’s and he built a Gourmet Cheese factory in Michigan in the 1970’s.
His son became the manager, we met on the soccer field 15 years ago and we’ve been friends ever since.
He told me the best and the brightest, like his father, left Denmark and socialism long ago, because they wanted to keep the fruits of their labor, not have it redistributed to those who wanted to sit on their ass and beg like dogs.
Ten years ago my soccer friend told me his father had been seeing the same sickness invading America for quite a while, five years ago they simply sold the factory, actually factories, they built three and employed 250.
And so it goes……
In Pinconning by any chance?