Kamala Harris Forced To Rely On Prison Labor For Struggling Campaign

Via The Babylon Bee

U.S.—Kamala Harris, California’s most famous cop, is reportedly watching her campaign completely unravel; she is plunging in the polls, and her aides are resigning. Unable to find anyone to work for her (and anyone she can afford), Harris has turned to something she has always relied on in the past: prison labor.

“Using prison labor just shows how resourceful I am,” Harris said as she monitored a man in an orange jumpsuit and shackles stuffing envelopes. “Prison labor is great. It’s like slave labor in that they have no choice, but legal!”

Many of those working for Harris despise her — which makes it similar to her previous situation — but now they are unable to resign. “If you didn’t want to work on my campaign,” Harris said in a pep talk, “you shouldn’t have smoked marijuana.”

Harris has received criticism from other Democrats for her new campaign structure, especially Joe Biden when he recognized Harris’s new chief strategist. “Corn Pop! Is that you?” Biden exclaimed.

“Oh yeah, Corn Pop has been great,” Harris told the press. “Unfortunately he’s up for parole soon.” She then lowered her voice and smiled. “I’ll have to make sure that doesn’t happen.”

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8 Comments
AC
AC
December 3, 2019 1:38 pm

I guess they’ll be going back to prison, now.

She is apparently out of the race.
https://medium.com/@KamalaHarris/i-am-suspending-my-campaign-today-6dca8cefb252

Donkey
Donkey
  AC
December 3, 2019 2:11 pm

Sounds like a loser announcement.

Donkey
Donkey
  AC
December 3, 2019 3:35 pm

The self importance is stultifying.

Trapped in Portlandia
Trapped in Portlandia
December 3, 2019 4:01 pm

We can thank Tulsi Gabbard for shinning the light on this cockroach in the first debate, resulting in an early death for Kamala’s campaign.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Trapped in Portlandia
December 5, 2019 2:56 am

She IS a Lousy F’n Cockroach!!!!

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
December 3, 2019 5:39 pm

Hey, what was she to do….Willie Brown’s dick wasn’t going to suck itself.

overthecliff
overthecliff
December 3, 2019 6:33 pm

She could sell “favors”. She’s done it before.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  overthecliff
December 5, 2019 2:57 am

That two-bit gutter tramp’s become so haggard that nobody even wants that Nasty Bitch!!!