ATLANTA, GA—According to a report, as part of the settlement with Nick Sandmann, CNN hosts will be required to wear MAGA hats throughout every broadcast.
“Let the punishment fit the crime,” counsel for Sandmann said as Don Lemon, Chris Cuomo, Anderson Cooper, and Wolf Blitzer all solemnly donned Make America Great Again caps.
Hosts were seen with downcast expressions as they commented on the day’s events, MAGA hats in place.
Sandmann says the hosts will be forced to wear the hats until they’ve learned their lesson, which could take a while. “Just be careful you don’t make an expression some could construe as ‘smug.’ Wouldn’t want you to get punched or your lives to get ruined, or anything like that.”
CNN hosts must also finish every broadcast by saying, “Good night, and I am a big, fat dummy, while Trump is the best president we’ve ever had.”
Brian Stelter requested an exemption and was allowed to wear a clown nose instead, as usual.
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I will comment on this, even though I am afraid it may be “fake news”.
OH, but if could only be true. I would tape and save the entire next 24 hour news cycle. For those time when I am feel a little down, I could bring it out for some very good laughs.
Babylon Bee is a parody site….just like The Onion.
Amazing, how often a platform regular has to point that out.
Satire.
Geez, some liberal putz on Clinton News Network did a write up bemoaning the Baby Bee satire piece on the Dems calling for flags at half mast to honor Sulaimeni getting his ticket punched for access to multiple virgins as a martyr.
Some Mick named Donie, a mangeled moniker tag in deference to Orange man.
Can’t remember his familial name, and I won’t insult the good Irish, by guessing one of the more common last names.
One of his beefs was the Baby Bee article had more views / hits that his CNN article tweet and another media whore’s article combined.
Besides calling the Babs article right wing, and spreading lies and hate.
To top it all off, his mug shot on Twitter reveals a millennial soy boy journo-wannabe. A revolting one at that.
These people (Resistors) really are stupid.
The “problem” with BOTH the Bee and the Onion, is that there stories are often more right on the money than the supposed “real” news. I think that is what upsets the fake news folks the most.
While the settlement (of an unknown amount that is likely protected by a “non-disclosure” agreement), is a great thing, it will not stop these pieces of shit from piling on at every turn if THEIR narrative promotes “the agenda.” As the story of Richard Jewell shows (a great movie by the way), NOTHING has changed in 30 years of mainstream media coverage of events. Here is a link to a story about some revelations in the Treyvon Martin case that will hopefully be another swift kick in the balls to the mainstream media and the fake hate crime perpetrators:
Heh… It would be a step down (for them) from pussy hats.
More appropriate hat:
Does it come in camo?
I might just be a random target. But this could be an attempt to Qanon me. – Krugman
I didn’t know Qanon framed people
Trust the plan. It sometime requires revision.
Wouldn’t that be great? Can you imagine the looks on their faces as they sat there with MAGA hats? Although seriously it would be a massive improvement over the asshats they usually wear…..