With Fireworks Canceled, Americans Celebrate By Firing Their Many, Many Guns In The Air

Via The Babylon Bee

U.S.—With fireworks displays around the country canceled due to COVID, millions of Americans have resorted to celebrating American independence by firing their obscene numbers of firearms into the sky in defiance of tyranny.

While all the whiny liberals stayed inside and cried liberal tears, true patriots took to the streets in a show of force and fired approximately 328 billion rounds of ammunition into the clouds to stand up for real American values.

“Yeehaw!” Americans shouted. “Guns and America! Boy, howdy!”

Reports indicate the thunderous noise lasted over 3 hours, being heard all around the globe. Tyrants and dictators around the world cowered in their bedrooms at the sound of freedom ringing out across the land.

During the raucous party, Americans drank all the beer and ate all the burgers. They then all went to the store to stock up on more ammo.

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10 Comments
MrLiberty
MrLiberty
July 4, 2020 7:50 pm

Only point and fire at what you plan to kill (or a target if practicing).

Anonymous
Anonymous
  MrLiberty
July 5, 2020 2:05 pm

123gr 6.5×39 Grendel is too expensive to waste. It’s best used on hawgs.
Nothing better than pork ribs.

Anonymous
Anonymous
July 4, 2020 8:02 pm

And when they got to the store, they found the ammunitions shelves wanting. Keep that powder dry and close.

Neuday
Neuday
July 4, 2020 8:36 pm

Save such ammo wasting celebrations for the victory celebration.

Thunderbird
Thunderbird
July 4, 2020 11:08 pm

And think about where all those bullets are going to land; like thru buildings, cars, or whatever.

If your state does not allow one to purchase fireworks then maybe it is time to move to another state more friendly to allowing people to do their thing. Or get rid of the people suppressing you.

AlwaysTrumperTampa
AlwaysTrumperTampa
  Thunderbird
July 4, 2020 11:50 pm

tbird,
correct about the bullets,wrong about the fireworks–
your freedom ends when it intrudes upon mine–

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Thunderbird
July 5, 2020 2:30 am

Wyoming has a bang up tourist business in fireworks sales; year round, too.

old white guy
old white guy
July 5, 2020 9:00 am

When I was a kid we used to fire our guns on the 4th. My Grandfather, not one to waste ammo, would load shotgun shells for me with paper wads. The big bang plus some fire coming out of the barrel. Loved it.

Panzerlied
Panzerlied
July 5, 2020 12:52 pm

And when it comes to confronting the enemy, not a shot, only crickets. America has lost its taste for freedom and the ardent desire and duty to defend it at all costs. Had this generation lived in the 18th century, Lexington and Concord would only exist as a footnote in the British history books, as we came, we saw, we conquered, and not a shot was fired by those chickenshit “rebels” who pissed themselves and ran away when we arrived.
Stone mountain will fall and everyone will turn the other cheek……………again. Hah, guns and ammo, a lot of good that did, we might as well have been disarmed years ago, at least that would have made for a valid excuse for not fighting back.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Panzerlied
July 5, 2020 2:07 pm

Nice rant …. but not yet.