Guest Post by Kurt Schlichter
Leaving California for Texas is such a conformist thing to do these days, but I did for a short vacation to America. In Houston, I went into an H.E.B. and was talking about California to someone who was giving away free samples of beef – having conversations with random people is a huge difference from LA – and I had to reassure the guy I was going home. He seemed relieved. I’ve been coming to Texas intermittently for about 30 years, and it’s never seemed more crowded. The place is packed – the roads, the stores, the airport. Back home in LA, it’s empty and depressing as the pols elected by the brigades of frigid Santa Monica wine moms who seem to run everything panic ever-harder over a disease that appears to be less virulent than the regular flu.
Here in Texas, people are happy, chipper, and armed.
Let’s explore the migration from the Golden State to the Lone Star State by comparing and contrasting Texas vs. California.
Politically, I live in a congressional district where my congressman is Ted Lieu. Ted Lieu is really dumb. Here, the congressman is Dan Crenshaw. Look, Crenshaw’s softer than I’d prefer – everyone is softer than I prefer – but this exchange is like a chick dating Brad Pitt after breaking up with Brian Stelter, who is a potato. Bumper sticker-wise, in California you get a lot of people demanding that you COEXIST, or else, presumably. There are also a fair number of people with Biden stickers still on their Priuses. I’m pretty sure it’s not done ironically. In Texas, there are not so many political bumper stickers, but lots of people with flags and Jesus-related stickers. In the end, Texas voted for Trump; California is full of liberal idiots who turned a beautiful state into an open hobo sewer.
Advantage: Texas.
Maxine Waters, Gavin Newsom and Nancy Pelosi come from California. But the Bushes came from Texas.
Advantage: A pox on both your houses.
In terms of gun freedom, you can pack in Texas without a permit. This is the land of no sudden moves. Maybe this contributes to the general vibe of politeness. And you do not see hordes of criminals rushing into stores to loot. But in California, a guy who commanded over 1000 troops with real assault rifles on the streets of Southern California – while carrying his own – still has to ask permission from some bureaucrat to do it legally. And you do see hordes of criminals rushing into stores to loot. Hopefully, the Supreme Court will soon sort this anti-gun tyranny nonsense out. In the meantime, the winner is clear.
Advantage: Texas.
People are nice in Texas. They will strike up a conversation with you and chat away for a while. In California, they won’t. Californians do not talk to you and prefer you not talk to them. It’s not that Californians are nasty. They just don’t pretend to care.
Advantage: I often find other people annoying, so this one is a wash.
The traffic is terrible in Houston. This is partly because the freeways are laid out randomly and the signage is a jumble of confusing misinformation. Also, they have access roads that run alongside freeways for some reason. LA’s freeways layout is straightforward and simple. Also, the traffic is better in LA party because Cali is less crowed – everything is always packed in Houston – but because Californians know how to drive in traffic. They are fantastic drivers. Texans are terrible drivers. Maybe they are nice in person because they can let their ids run free behind the wheel. They tailgate, cut you off, and take it personally if you want to slide into their lane. Californians are chill. Unless it rains. Then they forget how to drive.
Advantage: California.
In Texas, you can get a palace for $800,000. In California, you can get a shack for $800,000. If you can find one for sale. And it would be in Bakersfield.
Advantage: Texas.
In California you have to wear masks in most places and, in some, show your vaxx papers. In Texas, no. They have no truck with that fascist nonsense. Maybe 20% of people mask up in regular stores, though it’s 50% in Whole Foods. Stereotypes are true!
Advantage: Texas.
Beers. Texas has Shiner Bock. California has undrinkable bespoke IPAs brewed by hipster doofuses who no one will ever love.
Advantage: Texas.
The burger question is perhaps the most fraught question of them all. In Texas, they have Whataburger, which I naturally visited. A nice man with an elf hat sold me my cheeseburger. It is a straight-forward burger, with a bit of mustard for spice. It’s also bigger than other burgers, as would be expected from Texas. In California, we have In-N-Out. The cheeseburger is smaller, and it should be customized animal style. These are both sound burger options. To pick between them is like forcing Joe Biden to choose between a rerun of Murder, She Wrote or Matlock. But a choice must be made.
Advantage: California.
There you have it. Since I am a blue state lawyer and California is run for my benefit, I’ll hang there for a while. But everyone else ought to flee.
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I read something about Texas gun laws changing from county to county. I bet it’s not as free and unlimited as the author thinks. I always liked how there are Whataburger and dairy queens everywhere in TX. One thing Ca. has over Tx. is a lot less heat and humidity. Tx has tornados and Ca. has earthquakes and fires. I thought people in both states drive way too fast and squirrely.
No sorry, the gun laws do not differ from county to county. BUT businesses may prohibit firearms provided that the establishment prominently display the appropriate signage.
Austn, Houston , San Antonio, Dallas/Ft Worth, are all large metro areas with the same problems as any large city run by clueless libtards and populated by diversity.
Like a lot of other states, the further away from the cities, the more self-sufficient, and Republican, people tend to be.
Yep. We are normal out here in the country. If it weren’t for the money I make there, I would never go to DFW again.
Texas is awful, there’s nothing good about Texas. The place is uninhabitable without air conditioning except when the occasional ice storm turns the place into a frigid wasteland of frozen pipes and cooking by candle. The place is awash in illegals and if you don’t speak spanish you are screwed. There are subdivisions far as the eye can see, hideous traffic and fools by the ton. Stay in California….they need your tax dollars.
I see what you did there… 😉 Still, coming originally from New England, I adore Texas and have never felt more at home. May we always hold the line, I don’t want to leave. 78 in late December and the ice cream is selling!
I’ve met some folks I’d choose to avoid but the majority I speak with are here for the right reasons.
Oh yeah… Whataburger all the way!
Yeah, I’m fine with MG downplaying TX (if that’s what she’s doing), but coming from a liberal area with lots of problems, it’s been a relief for sure. Not as pretty as other states, but I’m here for the people.
Mrs. Adams, you speak treason! (unless you’re talking about Midland-Odessa or maybe Austin)
There are no mountains…just hills. But that’s ok.
Been to Big Bend?
No, I haven’t, GCP. It’s on my list of things to do before I die. Just waiting for a good time when it’s not so HOT! When will that be??
60 here in the snowbelt today. Plenty warm for this old toad.
I see what you did there.
Y’all move to Texas because whatever the problems are in Texas, they are worse in Florida and at a tipping point. So many Carpet Baggers have moved here since 2008 that the Black Queer druggie ex-Mayor of Tallahassee Andrew Gillum was damned nearly elected Governor in 2020 (instead of the Great Conservative Honorable Ron DeSantes) and at the rate of 1,000 more Yankee Blue Bellies moving here daily, some faggot communist might get elected in 2024. No problem of that happening in 2024 in Texas (I hope).
Yeah, well, I heard the fishing is great in Texas.
But TX has In-N-Out too? There’s one about 40 minutes from me…and I’m rural. Of course, I’d pass about 30 Whataburgers first before getting there.
I’d never live in Houston, or Austin, or Dallas. However, I’ve never been accosted in these cities for being a normal, healthy, white female either. Everybody seems to mind their own business. I think it’s because no one knows if you’re armed or not. Guns really do help keep the peace.
As the author, Robert Heinlein, is alleged to have said (in one of his books?), ‘An armed society is a polite society.’
My guess is that any 3-year old could figure that out …
“My guess is that any 3-year old could figure that out …”
I’m a slow learner. But, better late than never.
He didn’t compare the % of illegals. I assume Texas has a shit ton of them.
Mygirl says they’re killing and eating her cows right where they find them in her pastures.
Well … thank God that CA hasn’t got wetbacks and countless other illegals … except, for, about every other person in the State … and the crime and grime that goes with it.
AA Having been out in the “country” in Mexico years ago I know whereof you speak.
Hispanic Texans along the border voted for Trump in record numbers. Like > 50% in some areas. They don’t like illegal immigration.
What-a-burger hands down
Correct, sir! There’s no contest.
i love me a double whataburger with cheese but there is no comparison to an in-n-out double/double animal style burger.
sadly i don’t live anywhere near either one of them…im in mcdonalds/sonic territory…30 miles to a Wendy’s.
As a Texan let me congratulate you on your ability to persevere in California. I will remember you in my prayers. I would also disagree with your choice of burger restaurant and unequivocally endorse Whataburger – just ask Mel Tillis. We are freer here in the Lone Star State, and happier, too. Texas is as close to Heaven as you’re going to get, and while it gets HOT for awhile, there’s a thing called an inner tube, a case of Lone Star Beer, and the Frio River…(advantage Texas). I should also point out that no Texan has EVER paid 5.00 bucks a gallon for gas (advantage Texas). I could go on, but let me finish with this thought – NO ONE is more proud of their home than a Texan (it’s one of the ways we can spot new arrivals), and you will find us to be intensely nationalistic on that point.
GOD BLESS TEXAS (advantage Texas)
As a canukistan we seriously looked at buying some property in Texas. In the last ten years we nearly took the plunge three times but elderly family issues kinda pulled the plug on that.
We’re, me mostly, am still waiting for the moment we can uproot and move. Rural Texas is where I’m aiming for… somewhere it nice’n warm… easier on the broken body…
Unless you like desert, rural Texas is now unaffordable. Too many yankees and other interlopers have driven the cost way out of sight. West Texas has affordable land. This is west Texas. ….
I live in a desert, northern part of the Senora desert, South Okanagan here in British Communista. This last summer was pretty warm, 50C/122F as was on the thermo on the shady side of the garage. Nice thing about the desert… there are fewer wandering around and its outta the rain… 🙂
On my horse with no name…
I see about six green thingies. A veritable oasis!
It doesn’t look like that where I am in rural TX. And, it was much, much cheaper than what I had in CO. I got more property for my money here in TX.
Mygirl, don’t people in West Texas have to put up with Oil Rig Fracking Industry???
The wastelands are calling me.
Any decommissioned missile silos for sale out there?
Replace “land” with “dirt”.
No you twit. Texas SUCKS, IT SUCKS BIG TIME. STAY AWAY. The rivers are so full of pissing assholes that you can walk from bank to bank and not get your feet wet. Whataburger is now owned by a yankee company so forget the ‘texas’ in whataburger. Lone Star is horse piss, canned and the Californians who are moving here in droves are turning the state leftist. Viva La Raza has so many illegals here that the Californians are getting a run for their money when it comes to trashing the place and…
I didn’t say MY cows were being butchered in the pasture, I take better care of them than that, but cows in pastures nearby are indeed being slaughtered or stolen. Ditto for horses.
This is serious for you people who know cattle. Just before covid, my wife and I took a trip to Texas. We drove from Houston to Austin, San Antonio, and Corpus Christy. We are on a country road driving 65 or so. My wife goes, there’s a cow laying down, legs straight up. I say no, two cows were right next to the fence, four legs sticking up, no blood. Looked dead as can be. I thought about this. Is this bizarre or what? I thought one dead cow with four legs up is strange. Two is like the twilght zone. Is this common? The only thing I could think of is electrocution. But I doubt electrical fences are powerful enough to kill a cow. Have others seen this and what could it be?
A quick picture search shows cows with “four legs up” is not all that unusual.
disclaimer: I’m a city boy and know neither Jack or Shit about cows.
But I doubt electrical fences are powerful enough to kill a cow. Have others seen this and what could it be?
Lightning.
The lightning hits the ground and electrocutes the cattle. I knew a woman in East Texas who ran a wildlife preserve, mostly large feline predators with a few wolves and bears in the mix. One day there was a trailer filled to the brim with dead cattle. I said, ‘damn, where did you get all those cows?’ and she replied that a rancher had had many head killed by lightning and he’d donated the carcasses to her sanctuary.
Thanks. Very possible.
Jonestown Texas
“I should also point out that no Texan has EVER paid 5.00 bucks a gallon for gas (advantage Texas).”
Yet. Just wait another year or so under the O’Biden regime.
#Texit Support the http://www.danielomiller.com
campaign for Lt. Gov.
I have to agree as a Brit who visited Texas in 1997. I stayed in Bandera and was overwhelmed by the hospitality, the openness, the whole life style – I loved the place and the people – I would move there if I had the means. And, WOW it’s so big – for a Brit it’s MegaBig! And yes, gun ownership brings peace and respect. I have wonderful memories of amazing times.
As it is, my escape from UK has to be my next favourite place, Cape Town. I lived there for 10 years, the life-style is perfect, the climate amazing and the Afrikaners are a bit like the Texans – tough, honest, open and welcoming (and quietly – armed). I guess it is because they both have a common pioneering history breeding tough people who respect each other unlike the Libtards. Definitely, advantage Texas.
Can’t wait to get back to CT. Working on a plan at present.
AP…this is a sign that is posted at most of the businesses around me. When I go out, I hear no fewer than 50 times (at least), “Have a blessed day.” People are smiling. People hug you…just because. It’s really a different vibe from where I used to live. It took some time getting used to the lack of chaos.
This is an example of a sign in the school district near me. (I’m not near the school in the sign)
And, just for fun…an example picture of my horse! 😊 (not my actual horse, but he looks very similar). His name is Caesar…great name, huh?
Shoulda named him Willie.
Ok, now. Lol.
Geldings masturbate by smacking their willies against their bellies. They also need their sheaths cleaned and the clots that are removed are called smegma or ‘beans.’
Just a little factoid that you probably never really wanted to know. You can thank me later.
Yes, MG. He had not been ‘maintained’ properly when I got him, so he needed a lot of TLC in that area. I was scared he was going to kick me when cleaning it, so had the vet come over to do it. Turns out he stayed pretty calm during the process…guess he liked it??
He has an amazing temperament… calm, sweet, and gentle. I did break my wrist riding him though because he spooked over some low-flying planes. Other than that, he’s been great.
Wonderful pics AA thanks – I have sent them to my Brit friends wishing for a Fighting New Year!
Lot of hamburger talk here reminds me of a trip to D-FW area 30+years ago.Wife and I are Mexican/Tex-Mex food fans. Arriving at our hotel and being hungry we spotted a mom and pop taco place. Being from the Northern states we thought we had hit the jackpot being this close to Mexico. Absolute worst Mexican food we ever had! High hopes dashed on the rocks of reality. We arrived at the airport and picked up a rental car and headed out in a THUNDERSTORM. We pulled out on to the LBJ Freeway and everyone was driving 75 mph and you really couldn’t see the hood ornament for the rainfall. Every pickup that flew by us had a well supplied gunrack. Crazy! After getting settled in and the torrents ending we had a really great time a a major church conference. Great vacation overall.
Beaches. Advantage: California. Barbecue. Advantage: Texas.
Sorry J, Texas has AWEFULL Bar-Be-Que. For the best Bar-Be-Que in the Nation go to Kansas City.
The good things in California were put there by God. The bad things were done by Californians.
CA beaches….
60F water.
75F here.
I’ll vouch for that–SoCal ocean water is ‘a bit brisk’. Good fishing though.
Surfed Rincon to San Clemente for 35 years before I moved to Or.
So Cal beaches are fine if you like raw sewage, diapers and empty bags of Doritos….and that’s before you get a good rain.
I’ll take a shoulder high NW winter swell At indicator any time though.
20 years ago, Houston drivers were crazy and fast, but the traffic moved along at a nice pace. Bumper to bumper @ 75mph and the guy in the next lane put on his signal, you had better make room for him because he was coming into your lane. It was a warning, not a request. I suspect the influx of foreigners from other states & illegals hasve affected the driving habits significantly.
Same experience 35 years ago in Houston…..last time ther in 2017 I got raped by the “pay to drive on our highway crowd”. Guess I shloulda taken the “hint” from teh rental car company to get the ezypass……
Privately owned roads are not always the best idea, but they do get built faster than state funded roads.
Would have been nice to label them as such, most of the time I had no idea they were tollways, only time I paid more was a visit or two to Ontario, at least the Kanucks advertised the route as a pay as you go, LOL
Yep. I found myself on one of the tollways in Dallas without ever knowing I had entered it. Luckily, I was transporting a new truck with a drive out tag and I doubted they could trace it back to me.
Don’t blame me – When they had us vote in Houston 30+ years ago on the Beltway 8 loop, I voted no. Even though they promised that when it was paid for, they’d lower the toll to a maintenance fee or eliminate it altogether…. Time has proven me correct. They lied. Oddly, some in public positions pushing that toll road and those also pushing the new one (99) seem to own land along the routes. What are the odds of that??!
Any chance I get to vote against using my tax dollars I always say no. However, I rarely am on the winning side of the vote since everyone else wants to spend my money for me.
In the 50’s, Oklahoma passed the Turnpike bill to build the Turner Turnpike between OKC and Tulsa. Same promise was made to the people. 70 years later and the tolls are still being collected and that road has been paid for 20 times over.
Low tax Texas lol. My property tax bill due Jan 31st 2022 is roughly $17,000. Texas has the 5th highest property tax rate in the country. The “Low Tax Texas” is pure propaganda bullshit and applies to companies, not individuals.
Then add $12 a day for road tolls but gasoline is cheaper. Private medical insurance premiums are among the highest in the country because everyone is so fat and unhealthy – a gold premium policy runs me about $36,000 a year, silver about $28,000 for a family of five. There are only 2 companies in east Texas that offer private medical insurance policies that aren’t part of Medicaid so people looking to relocate their small business to Texas be advised. Fresh fruit and produce is limited to the bare essentials and of mixed quality and everything is fried or poor quality TexMex / fast food rubbish. Plus the energy business is running at about 60% employment levels from pre-2014 crash and good luck finding a job of you’re over 45 or in manufacturing / construction and don’t speak Spanish.
It’s OK here and I wouldn’t get too caught up in how great one place is compared to another as everywhere seems to have been ruined over the last 25 years. Hell, I used to live in that “paradise” Australia and look where that place has gone. It’s a global disease that affects everywhere.
I live in the Midwest and had to go to DFW for personal business. Was not impressed. When I got there, I had to drive and drive before I could get to my Motel. And yes, the Texans who live there are horrible drivers. They speed, tailgate you and the Interstate was crowded in the middle of the freakin’ day!!! My Motel room door had a gap in it that allowed a lot of noise and cold air in. Not very pleasant. While there, I tried 4 Bar-Be-Que Restaurants. All were not worth the gunpowder it would take to blow them up. Was glad to leave there. I have spent some time in the Texas Panhandle. It was much better than DFW Area.
Texans have been conditioned to bad food with limited selection so even mediocre food (usually fried) is raved about as “Best in the World”. People here also judge food by the portion size for some reason and I’ve seen this in other parts of USA too.
They like hyperbole here because not many have been anywhere else for a comparison.
LBJ, John Connelly, Ted Cruz, George W. Bush, Rick Perry….lots of issues.
California just passed a statewide composting requirement. https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2021-12-26/organic-waste-composting-law-2022-recycling
I get that a lot of people like to compost. Great. Apparently kitchen waste in a landfill gives off methane, and we can’t have that since we’re trying to change the weather. So folks are supposed to save their broccoli cuttings and chicken bones in a pail in their apartment kitchen for a week – to give off the methane there instead. Or just grind it up in the disposal – which is what they’re really going to do. Of course, the new law will help employ garbage inspectors and people to hand out the $500 fines.
Pretty soon California will ban meat, since cows fart, and if cows fart we can’t change the weather. People need to stop eating meat and start eating more beans. Then the people can fart and stop us from changing the weather.
People shouldn’t pay any attention to Tony Fauci’s Climate Policy Directives either…
fruit flies, try to get rid of those! And ACV don’t work!
Whataburger is far better than the cardboard tasting in-n-out. However, I love and respect the resistance it has put up to the jab mandate.
For the best fast-food burgers in Texas, try Mighty Fine and P. Terry’s!
Hey Kurt!
In-n-Out sucks.
Whataburger(Or better yet, Braums-real greasy) is a great burger for a great price.
You are correct about the drivers, tho.
When it gets too hot in Texas, they all migrate west to the Sacramento Mtns, lemmings rushing west to higher elevations carrying huge wads of oil money which they spend at the local casinos, ski slope and race track. Love them Texans.
Robert (QSLV)
We have In and Out Burger here in Texas too! In and Out AND Whataburger bitches!