Auto Cop

Guest Post by Eric Peters

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An interesting unasked question has been raised by Ford’s announcement that it is developing a cop-less cop car. That is, an automated and AI cop car that would sneak itself behind the bushes and use license plate scanners, facial recognition and other such revenue-raising technologies to automatically issue paying’ paper.

All the time. Everywhere.

For everything.

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No more need to pay cops to do it some of the time.

In other words, no more part-time, scattershot enforcement of traffic laws. It would become much harder to flout – or evade – any traffic law. Everything from “speeding” to driving around without all your papers in order. Auto Cop would know – immediately.

And there’s no bargaining with him.

But why should anyone object to (as Ford itself puts it) more “efficient” enforcement of the law? This assumes, of course, that the laws being enforced are reasonable, defensible, etc.

They’re not, of course. And everyone knows it.

Which is precisely why they aren’t enforced “efficiently.” It would trigger an uprising.

The whole point of the current system is the selective enforcement of idiotic laws. In order to maintain idiotic laws.

Consider speed limits as an example. Unlike reasonable laws – those regarding theft and murder, for instance – speed limits are flouted by almost everyone who drives, almost every time they drive. Whether by a lot or a little is irrelevant. The point  – and living/breathing cops (and judges, even) admit it – is that most speed limits are ignored and aren’t rigidly enforced because everyone agrees they are ridiculous.

If they were rigidly enforced, it would become apparent very quickly just how ridiculous they are. How unsustainable they are. It would be necessary to raise them almost across the board so that most drivers weren’t constantly being sent tickets for “speeding” by Auto Cop.

The only only reason the idiotic 55 MPH National Maximum Speed Limit lasted for 20 long years was due to the fact that it was possible to drive faster than that, most of the time . .   and get away with it. It was like a lottery – or a bison hunt.

Most of the herd escaped unscathed most of the time.

Occasionally, there were enforcement campaigns but these were greeted with outrage and derision and quickly abandoned, even though the law remained on the books. Idiotic laws can only survive when they are not efficiently and effectively enforced.

The same is true of other idiotic traffic  laws, such as those forbidding window tint and requiring everyone to buckle-up all the time. It is still very possible to evade most of these idiotic laws, most of the time.

This acts as a very important safety valve.

Outrage would erupt if the slew of idiotic traffic laws currently on the books were impossible to evade and enforced without exception – and without mitigation.

Rolling stops, for instance. There are times when it’s unsafe to come to a complete stop – irrespective of “the law” requiring a full stop before proceeding. As when it’s snowing and trying to maintain momentum on a slick hill and a full stop would leave you stuck. Or – worse – sliding backward down the hill. And red lights that remain red. Do you just sit there forever? Back up?

Isn’t that illegal, too?

Such things can be understood by – and explained to – a human cop and there is a decent chance he will cut some slack. The same goes for “speeding” and all the rest of it. All of us have been cut slack at one time or another. We count on this. It makes these idiotic laws sufferable when they would otherwise be insufferable.

We count on a human cop not being around to hassle (and mulct) us for scoffing such laws – and on the cop’s discretion if he is around. On being able to appeal to his sense or his humanity and hope he will ignore the law we both know is idiotic, even if that can’t be openly said or admitted to.

Auto Cop isn’t programmed to cut slack. He – it – simply records the “violation” and issues the citation.

Every single time.

Every transgression and infraction would be enforced without exception. No explanation would cut any mustard.

Just pay up.

This is good news, actually – and not just for the armed government workers who in addition to fearing for their safety must now fear for their well-paying, well-pensioned jobs.

“Efficient” enforcement of idiotic laws is the godsend unspoken reason why Auto Cop will likely never be deployed. It would ruffle too many feathers. Plucking one goose every now and then is one thing. If the entire flock is subjected to plucking – and at the same time – well, even geese have their limits.

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20 Comments
Wip
Wip
March 2, 2018 2:22 pm

Auto cop can/could be programmed to ignore a certain % of infractions. Also, from what I understand, any signals can be intercepted.

Dutchman
Dutchman
March 2, 2018 3:21 pm

We need to drive wearing gorilla masks.

Anonymous
Anonymous
  Dutchman
March 2, 2018 4:00 pm

Or Hijabs.

Hollywood Rob
Hollywood Rob
March 2, 2018 4:52 pm

The auto-cop red light camera didn’t work too well and has been removed in most states. But as time marches on technology does nothing if not improve and eventually you are bound to see auto-cop in your neighborhood.

I am sure glad that I am old.

Bob
Bob
March 2, 2018 5:04 pm

Unless the auto-car bristled with defensive measures, these things would likely get shot up, disabled, have their memories erased, set on fire, etc., etc., etc.

Coalclinker
Coalclinker
  Bob
March 2, 2018 10:58 pm

Automated police cars will encourage someone to experiment with combining big capacitors with really strong electromagnets. Both would be wired in parallel with a potent DC power supply. I believe that when the capacitor has “dielectric breakdown”, it will simultaneously spark and short circuit the magnet, shutting it down which collapses the field. A Tesla coil could be used in lieu of the capacitor. At that point really nasty and interesting things can happen. Like all machines using any solid state electronics would suddenly have them all fried beyond repair. I would say that if you were driving around in a your car toting one of these already illegal devices you better have a car that uses a carburetor fuel system and a point and condenser distributor, or you’ll be broke down right next to the ruined police car! Any pre-1973 car would work as the ” death ray” delivery device.

Rdawg the fascist
Rdawg the fascist
  Coalclinker
March 2, 2018 11:26 pm

Sounds complicated.

A few pounds of Tannerite would do it.

Mad as hell
Mad as hell
  Rdawg the fascist
March 3, 2018 11:05 am

I remember a few years back, there was a story in Arizona, of a guy with a shotgun going around and literally blowing away some of the red light cameras in Phoenix. Secretly, most people were cheering on this guy, and it took a while for him to get caught, as noone “saw” anything. As I recall he got a fine for damaging public property, and illegal use of a firearm but no jail time. Apparently, even the judge saw the logic here.
I suspect that EP is correct. If Robocop AKA Autocop is rolled out, I think we will see some very creative ways of anonymously destroying public property. I know if I was a witness, and someone asked me who did it, my amnesia would kick in, and I would become a dint see nothin…..
“The only only reason the idiotic 55 MPH National Maximum Speed Limit lasted for 20 long years was due to the fact that it was possible to drive faster than that, most of the time . . and get away with it. It was like a lottery – or a bison hunt.” – The only reason the 55 mile an hour speed limit has existed as long as it has is federal highway funds being conditioned upon it. Basically, follow the money.

i forget
i forget
March 2, 2018 5:15 pm

Random reward schedules hook, make compulsive-mad. Random punishment schedules chum the water, make compulsive-mad, then toss hooks to make quotas. Forward, & reverse, psychology. It’s an emotions thing.

Penforce
Penforce
  i forget
March 2, 2018 6:55 pm

Skinner. Sinner. Winner? Chicken dinner.

i forget
i forget
  Penforce
March 3, 2018 1:28 pm

Skin. Skinner. Skint. No more melanoma. But oh, the melodrama.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
March 2, 2018 5:25 pm

There are always solutions to every problem:

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true car faqs
true car faqs
March 2, 2018 6:14 pm

the original 1987 robocop movie starred a 1986 ford taurus lx.

Chuck
Chuck
March 2, 2018 7:31 pm

I want to see the AI car roll itself into the courtroom when I insist on a trial for my ticket.

MrLiberty
MrLiberty
  Chuck
March 2, 2018 9:25 pm

They don’t honor that with red-light cameras (no opportunity to face your accuser) why would they give a damn about this? By the time government places these everywhere, their pathetic attempts at pretending to give a shit about the taxpayers they are supposed to be working for, and whose freedoms and liberties they are supposed to be protecting, will be long gone.

Uriel
Uriel
March 2, 2018 7:53 pm

One thing’s for certain, the auto-cops will soon be here.

…..

And I, for one, would like welcome our new robot overlords.

I’d like to remind them that, as a 20-something millennial living in my parents’ basement, I can be useful in alerting them to online dissenters who oppose their dominion.

Oilman2
Oilman2
March 2, 2018 10:17 pm

This will result in:
1) slower traffic flow UNIVERSALLY
2) more accidents (as the old rules will not apply)
3) MANY more tickets
4) people using their phones to tattle the robocop location
5) if people contest the big increase in tickets in court, one will quickly see that the government relies on their drawn out process to herd people into paying instead of spending 2 days in court – let even 20% of those ticketed elect to fight it and the courts will be inundated
6) a certain percentage of people have no compunctions about shooting property, witholding their shots from cops that can fire back and chase them
7) more people running from the scene, as the robocop cannot break driving laws – so no chases by the robocop
8) fake license plates or copied license plates all over the map – it’s easy to make one that will trick a robocop

I want to be there when the robocop tickets the self-driving car – how exactly does that play out?

nope – this will not work, no matter how much the techies try to shove it up our asses

james the deplorable wanderer
james the deplorable wanderer
March 3, 2018 12:44 am

Someone has to service and maintain those robocars. I can’t imagine anyone who could be bribed to sabotage them – but then, they will have gas tanks, and sugar is cheap …..

Hollywood Rob
Hollywood Rob
March 3, 2018 11:23 am

Hey folks, you all seem to be under the impression that robocar will actually be a car. It will not be a car. It will be a pole stuck in the cement with a camera on it and they will be everywhere. They are already at the entrance to the tunnels into NYC. The only need for a car is to chase you down. They won’t be chasing you down. You will just get the bill in the mail. If you don’t pay the bill, then the car will show up at your house at 2 am with four really big government employees to help you find your shoes and coat. Don’t bother with the belt though. Those aren’t allowed in the place that they will be taking you.

I actually like the burka idea best of all. They can’t prove that you are not muslim.

Brad
Brad
March 4, 2018 4:21 pm

Not a good idea!