December 20th is a night that will live in infamy. At least until the next infamous family experience, that is. Last night I came within a hairs breath of losing my 18 year old daughter in a traffic accident.
My daughter calls my wife explaining how she got a flat tire on the beltway. For anyone familiar with the Northern Virginia area, that’s 495 I’m talking about. I get on the phone with her and find out that she is on the side of the road with a cop that is on the scene. Her and the cop are waiting for the state police. I tell her I’m glad she is safe and we’ll see her when she gets home. At this point, what do I have to worry about? She is with a cop and more cops are on the way. 5 minutes later my daughter calls again screaming and crying. Someone hit her car and it sounds damn bad.
Well, this is when the fun begins. I’ve been spending the last 3 hours imbibing with my wife and the mother in-law (It is the holiday season, ya know). My wife and her mother are the 2 worst people to be with in any kind of emergency. Ho Lee Fuk (ode to Stucky), who is gonna drive? The mother in-law says she is gonna drive (she says she had only 1 glass of wine and “No-one is going to keep me from getting my granddaughter” Yes, she only had 1 glass).
Hysteria all the way to the crash site. Mother in-law is the worst driver in the f’n world. If she isn’t bitching about the car riding her ass or the cars speeding by or the people who are cutting her off she’s yelling back and forth with my wife who is on the phone with my daughter. I cannot make heads or tails about any information being thrown around.
Any time I start talking, the both of them simply keep yelling. If they act like this at the crash site around the cops, I’m afraid one of them will simply decide to shoot all of us. You do not want to be in a foxhole with either of them much less both of them. They would immediately surrender under marshmallow volleys or the enemy would be able to pinpoint our position by their non-stop hysterics.
Here’s what happened…4 cars (including the cop who was with her to begin with) hit something on the beltway that caused all of them to receive a flat tire. 3 of the cars were able to pull over to the shoulder. My daughter did not. She got out of the car to look at the tire. This was chance #1 where I could have easily lost my daughter. The cop who was already standing outside of her car yelled for her to put her hazards on and run across 2 lanes of traffic to get out of the road. This, of course is chance #2 where I could have easily lost my daughter.
As they were waiting for more police to arrive, a man in a Honda slammed into the back of my daughter’s car ($#%%^&*, I could scream. I found her that cherry ass car. 2002 Camry with 30K miles on it. Bought it for $2,400. It was going to be her 10 year car.). I’m counting this as chance #3 and #4 because 1) if the cop wasn’t there, I believe she might have decided to stay in the car. and 2) because she said the car was hit so hard that it missed hitting her by 10 feet. Yes, I know. GET THE CAR OUT OF THE F’N ROAD TO BEGIN WITH. 495 is pretty damn crazy. EVERYONE (except my mother in-law) drives 70+.
She received a ticket (I have to check this since I haven’t looked at the ticket yet) for failure to turn on her hazards. This is what my daughter told me. Yes, I have to check by looking at the ticket. But since I am writing this at 3 am (I had a nightmare and woke up in a cold sweat), it will have to wait until tomorrow. The cop who advised her to run across 3 lanes of 495 traffic said in her statement my daughter DID turn her hazards on. I don’t KNOW the law concerning this but she is required to show up for the court date. The fine is between $30-$100. Again, I have to look at the ticket.
I could have lost my daughter 4 different times in The Blink of an Eye.
A car died on me in the early A.M., on a snow covered road (I95) in the middle of a bridge over the Thames River in CT. I got out, went to the side and walked down to the beginning of the bridge. A cop was there; he was pissed at me for leaving the car; I explained that I didn’t want to get rear-ended by a trailer truck (and die); we got in his policemobile with lights flashing, drove up to my car, I went to my car and it started; I then drove off to work.
Hey Wip, glad your daughter is OK.
I’ve mentioned to you that I grew up in Northern VA–before I-495 was built! Once a quiet 4-lane, 66-mile “beltway” around D.C., it’s now usually a congested nightmare. Luckily, I don’t get on it too often, as my work commute is via the FF County Parkway and opposite rush-hour traffic.
Last month a cop stopped in Maryland to assist a disabled car and driver on the side of the road (270?), who turned out to be an FBI agent. A car ran into both of them and they died.
Scary to think about…BTW, my son has a 2000 Camry and I worry about the same thing with him should something similar happen. You just gotta hope they can get the car (and themselves) to the side of the road, but even there, you should get your person well off the shoulder so a car doesn’t do what happens so often to those two men in Maryland recently.
Very happy she is safe! The rest will work itself out.
You know, I was going to write that by offering a few more rounds to the ladies, you pain would have been lessened, as they may have drifted off to sleep during the commute to the accident. Then I realized that my remark was rude, insensitive and sexist, so I quickly deleted it.
But then I realized that by offering my heartfelt apologies after making such a terrible comment, that maybe I could be forgiven such a rude outburst. So here it is; I’m sorry!
No worries, but thank you.
Wow… your daughter was lucky several times over as you wrote. NOVA is a scary place to drive. It’s dangerous at 2 AM. The people drive like certifiable assholes.
Merry Christmas. You received your present early and in spades.
Years ago ( I was driving my NEW Ford Pinto) a rare cloud burst rained out the Oakland A’s World Series game. It was rush hour and all the people at the Coliseum were trying to get on the Nimitz Freeway. Traffic came to a stop abruptly and as I peered through the driving rain I saw a propane tanker truck fishtailing and then tip over on its side just ahead of me. I slammed on my brakes and made for the left hand lane guard rail but the car behind me didn’t get the message and slammed into me. I didn’t know Pinto’s were supposed blow up when rear ended and fortunately mine didn’t but I was pinned in my car with my legs hanging out the door which was pressed up against the guard rail. Cars were slamming into each other all over the highway and I was screaming for help to free my legs before another car hit me and chopped them off.
The guys that hit me got out of their car and managed to push the side of my car just enough for me to free my legs. My ceramic coffee cup I had tossed in the back seat that morning had flown forward and shattered against my head so I was bleeding pretty badly but, otherwise, was mostly just bruised and shaken up. We were still standing in the rain on Highway 17 by a rear ended Pinto next to an overturned propane truck so the situation was not good!
Ambulances and Highway Patrol began to arrive and because my head was dripping blood the cops decided I needed to go to the hospital. Unfortunately, before I could get into the ambulance, a highway patrol officer setting up flares was hit by a motorist and they loaded him into my ambulance as he had broken legs.
These kind of things are going to happen to you eventually. If you are lucky you just have a good story to tell. If not you can be on the news in a bad way.
Whipper, there’s another cherry Camry out there somewhere, or some similar wheels. Just like paying for the ticket, it’s a shot to the wallet, but not insurmountable. You still have your girl. You can enjoy this Christmas with her and the rest of the family, and maybe have a good long chat after the anger and frustration pass. Perhaps a lesson or two can be gleaned from the experience, which she’ll take into adulthood. Yours was a good post. It’s good to reflect back on close calls, and be able to appreciate Lady Luck when she shows up during scary events. Be careful out there. Especially during holiday travels.
Yes, I guess this will be a great Xmas indeed.
Daughter is alive and safe. Can always get another car. Perhaps a Sherman Tank. Or a 1968 Chrysler Imperial. Congratulations on the greatest Christmas present possible. You and your family have a blessed holiday.
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Robert (QSLV)
That is a real car built for real Americans who did not need or want government officials to tell them what they must drive!
This one is better. 1971 Pontiac Catalina Brougham. Worked great as a first car for me, anyway!
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Ha, that is my first car, but I had the wagon= even better & bigger!
Ahhh, THIS is the kind of beast to have on wintery roads where SJW’s in there chintzy lil’ eco-cars routinely cut people off, ‘cuz they’re in a hurry. Ditto for the Yahoos in their huge pickem-up trucks with their 4WD’s, driving like maniacs….those can pull a Mad Max through deep snow, but 3 tons of steel spinning out of control on ICY roads are dangerous as hell, and 4WD’s aren’t immune to that sinking feeling.
It’s good to have a sturdy, strong cage around you, if a wreck is coming, and if there isn’t a damn thing you can do, but brace for impact and pray.
Of course, if it’s a classic in nice condition, like what Robert & Tom posted, then keep her in the gee-rahj until you can cruise around in the Summer, and avoid wrecks altogether. But man, that’s some old PA steel used in the assembly plant up in Deeetroit, and they don’t make ’em like they used to anymore. Mileage sucked, but they were land yachts that were almost indestructible. Nice chariots.
Add some pontoons and you have a boat!
And a tiller instead of a steering wheel- you don’t drive it as much as navigate it.
When I was growing up everyone had a big car. Some people around here drove VWs and you always heard stories about someone getting killed in one. There were a few Toyotas and they rusted out by the time they were 3 years old- lemon sized rust holes after one winter.
I remember that back around 1974 my grandfather was driving down Route 60 out in Boyd County, Kentucky in a big car when he hit a deer. The deer’s hindquarters flew up and landed on the hood and he pissed all over the hood and windshield, then jumped off of it and kept right on running! The car was a 1958 Cadillac 4 door hardtop. You know what it did to that car? Nothing! Try driving one of today’s “oh, they’re so much better than the old cars” and hit a deer. You’ll be looking at 7 to 8 thousand dollars of repair work.
That Cadillac looked alot like this one:
After living in both LA and NOVA it is a fact that the drivers in NOVA are the worst. In LA if you don’t drive with a modicum of brains they hose your car down with their favorite cap pistol…….
Wait, so she got a flat and just parked the car in one of the travel lanes on the beltway instead of pulling off the road like the other 3 cars? That is scary and no wonder the car was plowed into by another vehicle. Glad she was not in or next to the car at that time!
You are correct that there were multiple points in that whole episode where she was at risk, so it is a good day to be thankful and reflect on the important things in life. Then once that is done, teach her to get off the road when her car has a flat.
I can sympathize with putting up with people who are not at their best when emergencies happen, so your description of the ride to the scene made me chuckle. I’ve been there too.
Picture this…this part of the beltway has 6 lanes. The 2 left hand lanes are EZPass lanes separated from the other 4 lanes by tall, thin weeble-wobble type pylons. She was in the fast lane when she got the flat tire. I’m sure it was quite confusing to her but…DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO GET OFF THE F’N ROAD!!!
I’m praying for the guy who hit her car. He left the scene in an ambulance.
She was in the fast lane on the Beltway at night in the winter, and she stopped in the fast lane, and got out of the car to look at her tire????????? A DAY IN OBAMA’S AMERICA – The Burning Platform
I got a flat tire on my pickup heading north on I 84. I was in the slow lane and pulled over onto the grass. Convoys of semis were rolling past at 70 mph within 6 feet of me and my truck. Rather than even think of changing the tire I drove ahead on the gravel and grass to the next exit, about a mile away in Winchester, VA. Fortunately, though the tire was shredded the rim was undamaged. Even better, there was a tire dealer within sight of the exit. I gave thanks and had 4 new ones installed.
Yes, given the idiotic behavior of all concerned, the Force (or maybe an angel) was with you on this one….Merry Christmas, you have many blessings to count….
Happy to hear that your daughter is safe. Sorry about the car, but as my then 4 year old daughter once said, “they’re still making them”.
That same daughter starts driver’s education class tomorrow morning, so the story really hits home with me! I hope and pray that, should such a situation arise, she will be as fortunate as your daughter was.
Yikes. I’ve read Tom Clancy novels less intense. I’m glad she’s okay, Wip. It’s scary how fast things can go south. My condolences on the Camry; but, unlike daughters, used cars are replaceable. You have much to be grateful for this Christmas.
I have come to hate the 600 mile drive north to visit my family in CT. The trip starts off nicely on I 64, which has light traffic and beautiful scenery, up and over the mountains to Lexington, VA. From there on it is white knuckle driving all the way. The Interstates in the East are overloaded and it is rare to avoid backups, wrecks and the crazy moves of some idiot who tries to gain a few yards. Whenever possible, if time allows, I try to get off onto state highways. There are four lanes in the south with little traffic and most two lanes are more interesting and far less stressful than the Interstates. Having a GPS is very helpful on long trips. You can find alternate routes when the big roads get plugged up. Most truckers are good drivers, but there is often someone who pulls into the passing lane and starts a turtle race with another semi on a long grade. Cars back up behind the truck and then some dude in a rice rocket flies up on the right and cuts into the line. Heavy traffic and frustration lead to road rage. It is all too easy to get into a competitive mindset on the highway. Far better to stay cool and arrive late rather than not at all.
You really have to pay attention behind the wheel. Always. One of the dumbest things I have seen is someone backing up on I 495 to the exit they just missed.
There are angels with us. Glad she had hers on board.
I was driving to a gig in Tyson’s Corner back in the early 90’s, coming down the Beltway just south of Bethesda when a tractor trailer heading northbound lost a wheel- not a blow out, a whole wheel. I saw it bounce a couple of times and it must have caught the curved part of the concrete divider because it launched up in the air- still doing about 70mph- and crossed the median. I saw it coming but there was not a thing I could have done at that instant to change the outcome. It passed over my windshield and roof so close I could see the treads on it. If I had been one second slower, later, whatever it would have come right through the windshield and killed me. I remember looking in the rear view and seeing cars twisting left and right- caused a pretty bad multiple car crash that made the news. I just kept driving.
I don’t think we really understand just how many bullets we dodge in life. We are a lucky species.
Blessed.
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Robert (QSLV)
Ain’t that the truth! Forty years ago, I was headed south on 5 in Seattle, had just passed the Boeing plant, when a multiple car accident started to happen right in front of me. Then time froze. I was able to drive around the developing accident because the cars were not moving, and time started again….Talk about fate…
Pyrrhus,
I had a close call when a low IQ dozer operator started pulling down a two story masonry building before I could get my restored 1950 Chevy Suburban out of the way. I had parked below to help a friend get some stuff out of the building. Debris was starting to fall when I got in and started to move away. Time slowed to a near standstill as I coaxed the cold and sensitive V-8 to life and moved the vehicle back eight feet before a huge chunk of the second story crushed the front of my truck. I watched the front of the cab collapse in slow motion as I put my head against the door post next to the driver’s seat. What happened in a few seconds felt like I had all the time in the world to react. I often think of how quickly the human mind can respond to danger, when we are paying attention.
HF,
You are so right about dodging bullets, but sometimes we don’t get lucky. A few years ago a young woman driving on the Interstate near Charleston, WV lost her life when a truck wheel came through her windshield. Sometimes we are the windshield, sometimes we are the bug and sometimes the windshield ain’t enough.
Yikes! Errr, I mean … Ho Lee Fuk!
December 20th, the day Wip rediscovers to value each day as if it is your last …. because it COULD be, for him or a loved one. Our lives are like grass in the fields, today it prospers, tomorrow it dies. Speaking of which ….
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I was at B&N yesterday. Started reading a new release, winner of several “best book of the year” awards — When Breath Becomes Air. Quick synopsis;
“At the age of thirty-six, on the verge of completing a decade’s worth of training as a neurosurgeon, Paul Kalanithi was diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer. One day he was a doctor treating the dying, and the next he was a patient struggling to live. And just like that, the future he and his wife had imagined evaporated.
What makes life worth living in the face of death? What do you do when the future, no longer a ladder toward your goals in life, flattens out into a perpetual present? What does it mean to have a child, to nurture a new life as another fades away?”
Paul Kalanithi died in March 2015, while working on this book. It’s not a long book … I read over half of it in the store. But, it’s a deep and profound book. Would make a nice Christmas present for anybody.
I hate to be the “downer” on this and I’m VERY happy she is OK. But if she stopped in the roadway with a flat and couldn’t/didn’t understand the repercussions of not moving off the roadway, I’d be very worried about another similar boneheaded move in the future that could again put her life in jeopardy. She needs a long talk with Dad about using common sense in situations that befall us all on a daily basis. It is a jungle out there and lone fawns don’t do well. I have 3 daughters (21-27 years old) and know the emotion WIP went through. Again, very happy it all worked out-this time!
Yes, truer words were never spoken.
Picture this…this part of the beltway has 6 lanes. The 2 left hand lanes are EZPass lanes separated from the other 4 lanes by tall, thin weeble-wobble type pylons. She was in the fast lane when she got the flat tire. I’m sure it was quite confusing to her but…DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO GET OFF THE F’N ROAD!!!
I’m praying for the guy who hit her car. He left the scene in an ambulance.
“Mother in-law ….. If she isn’t bitching about the car riding her ass or the cars speeding by …”
I love your mother-in-law. Did she learn to drive in NJ?
Regarding replacing the car. Ms Freud is also a terrible driver. So, when I chose the current car (Sonata) I had one, and only one, criteria; the safest car on the road in terms of surviving a car crash.
You might come up with a different vehicle. Fine, I’m not selling Sonatas. Lol I’m just saying if I had to buy a car for my daughter, that would pretty much be my only consideration. Too many fucked in the head drivers out there to be concerned about anything else, IMHO.
Yes, Stuck, she IS from NJ. Too funny.
Yes, I know several guys who bought SUVs for their daughters on the basis of survivability….
why not a suburban Stucky? I thought you were smart?
Ms Freud can’t see over the steering wheel.
I think this would result in accidents.
All over the world, people will be planning funerals for a loved one instead of celebrating Christmas. You will not be one of those people. Your daughter has 9 lives, she used up 4 of them last night:)
Can’t even imagine what that car ride to the site of the wreck was like..kinda sounds like what my mother in law is like.
I’m one of those people who is calm during a storm, then after it all passes, I fall apart, start shaking, can’t sleep or even rest until the adrenaline is out of my system.
Have a Merry Christmas!
You just described how I have been handling it to a tee.
Notably, in Melbourne Australia, where a “non-terrorist” with “mental problems” from Afghanistan mowed down a number of people, including children.
Sorry for your trouble, but the real tragedy would have been you getting killed riding in a car with two hysterical women, both who had been drinking, to get someplace where none of you could do anything to change the situation and the danger had already passed. When your daughter called, she was on the side of the road with a cop. She was safer then you were.
Yes, that’s about right.
Yep, irrational behavior every which way but loose….
I think, ultimately, my daughter will be found to be at fault. Her ticket was not for failure to put her hazards on. The ticket is for failure to remove vehicle from the highway.
Do we need a lawyer? She followed the police officer’s instructions.
I wouldn’t get a lawyer. I wouldn’t help her at all. You are blessed. She lived. Hopefully so did everyone else. I would be thrilled about that. But she’s got some learning to do, because she might not live next time. Let her go through the grinder of the court system. Show no sympathy. She needs the tough love. Do it for her sake. She’s a young woman, she’s going to have decisions to make that can become life and death very quickly, especially when she has small children. It would be in her interest to know better than how she handled a simple flat tire this time. So many ways this could have been the worst Christmas ever for you. Even though she’s 18, you got some more parenting to do here. Her situational awareness is zero. If she doesn’t see nighttime highway traffic as a threat to her life, she could get herself into a lot of bad situations. Talk to her, work on her, she needs it
I wouldn’t get an attorney. There is a good chance the cop won’t even show up, in which case it will be dismissed. If it goes forward, the question will be why she couldn’t have just gotten over to the side of the road like the other cars. If something was preventing her, she may have a defense. If not, she probably will be found guilty, particularly because there is a direct connection because her failure to act and the crash, which is the very thing the law is meant to prevent. Often when a person shows up without an attorney, a judge will put them on the stand and ask the questions, which puts them more at ease. In any case, it will be a good experience for her, and hopefully she will learn from it.
Her and I are definitely going to seek legal advice. If for no other reason than to see if my wife and I are in any danger of being financially ruined.
I’m going to help her navigate this as best I can with the intention of reinforcing her responsibility for her decisions.
I am a bit torn though. She said she followed the cops instructions. I also believe the ability for her to pull over was hindered by the pylons separating her from the shoulder of the road to her left.
This isn’t a scenario where a person gets a flat tire and simply pulls off to the side of a 1 lane road.
DO NOT GET ME WRONG…A PERSON HAS AS MUCH RESPONSIBILITY TO OTHER DRIVERS AS THEY DO TO THEMSELVES. It really was split second decision making turning into a series of unfortunate events. I believe.
Wip, if the road was as busy as it seems, it may not have been possible for her to pull over to the right and get the car out of the road. Those cars are flying on the highway, which is probably why the cop told her to put on her emergency lights.
That’s why I use secondary roads as much as possible rather than the highways. Your daughter may want to consider that for a while.
I really am glad everything turn out OK for you guys. She was very lucky. She may have to go through the court experience (and I do recommend you seek counsel), but this Christmas will be a special Christmas for your family, intact.
Thank you Vixen. I was against her using the beltway all along. I can’t be with her every moment?
I’d say yes. The officer didn’t tell her to abandon her car in a traffic lane.
The cop told her to put her hazards on and run over to where she was. That’s the information as I was told.
Wip ,you and your daughter are blessed.A couple years ago a young girl ran out of gas on the I 85 .She stayed in her car while calling for help.A truck come up and apparently didn’t see her and hit her.She died there on the highway.You only have a few moments to get out of your car or off the road in situations like this.
“I wouldn’t get a lawyer.” —— starfcker
Strongly disagree. Only fools represent themselves in court.
The entire court system is stacked AGAINST the defendant! Why enter into that pit of vipers unarmed? You NEED your own viper … loathsome as that may be, it is how to play the game.
Surely, money is not the issue, I pray. Penny wise, pound foolish. If everything goes right and the gods smile upon you, a competent lawyer (don’t go cheap) can work wonders, perhaps even getting a dismissal (which happened for Ms Freud a few years ago).
Get a lawyer, or you’ll regret it.
Thanks StuckInNJ. No, money is not the issue.
Just thinking out loud here, but I think a lawyer might be a good idea. If the driver that hit her car was taken away in an ambulance, could he sue if he was hurt?
I’ve already contacted my lawyer. I can call him my lawyer since I’ve used him for 2 other family matters.
That’s exactly the right move, Wip. Listen to your lawyer and do nothing on your own.
BRAVO!!!!!
The fact of the matter is this; the OTHER PARTY will have a lawyer on their side … who will try to extract a pound of flesh from you.
To go into court lawyer-less would be Just Plain Fucken. Nuts.
You miss my point, Stuckey. I wouldn’t want that to be dismissed. I would want as many people as possible getting on her case, letting her know what a bad decision that was, so she didn’t just have to hear from WIP. She’s almost at the age where she will become a young mother. She’s going to have to become a lot more aware, and quickly. Can’t be a responsible adult and put herself and others in those kind of situations. In almost all other situations you would be right. I don’t think so in this one. Let them hammer her. She hurt somebody badly. She could have died herself super easily. And all of this could have been avoided with a little bit of, call it clearer thinking. Because it could be so much worse next time. WIP, don’t think for a second and I’m not thankful your daughter is alive. Best case scenario for sure. But that’s a horrifying decision. One that’s pretty much guaranteed to end badly. I would have drug tested her myself. You spent 18 years raising her up, she could have been gone in the blink of an eye
Perhaps the State should fine her $10,000. Maybe suspend her license one year. Maybe a few months jail. When will you be satisfied that she learned her lesson?
Here’s what we know
— her car is totaled
— she got a ticket, will have to go to court and face who-knows-what penalties
— she’s probably devastated that she caused her family pain and panic
— she knows the other driver left the scene in an ambulance, and if she’s actually responsible for the accident (I don’t know) then that is weighing heavily on her soul
— she knows she could be dead today
I think she learned her lessons without needing the fucken State heaping their own bullshit upon her.
You’re not considering the situation that she couldn’t get the car to the side of the road because of traffic. The cop told her to put her emergency lights on, not to pull the car over to the side of the road. The cop also told her to come over to the side of the road next to the cop. There could be extenuating circumstances.
Oh, and not to mention the action that caused the problem, something in the road caused four cars to have flat tires. That is not her fault. But again, what are the extenuating circumstances regarding getting the car out of the road?
She will maybe get off with a fine, unless the Judge goes goo goo and lets her off, but I would definitely hire a traffic lawyer. Plus, having an attorney usually moves your case to the top of the call, saving you a lot of time. I have represented a few people in traffic court.
“I wouldn’t help her at all.”
Strongly disagree.
What you don’t want to do as a parent is to remove the consequences resulting from your child’s actions. In that case, no good lesson is learned.
Wip’s daughter will have consequences to face. Hopefully, they won’t be severe.
But, helping your child, especially after a traumatic (and nearly tragic) event well, that’s what good parents do.
To not help is akin to saying “fuck off, kid” in my humble opinion. What parent can do that?
I am not saying Wip should do everything for his daughter … as if she’s an 8th grader. She should do as much as she can on her own. But, when help is asked for, give it!
Perhaps I don’t understand what starfcker means. But, “not at all” seems incredibly severe.
I would take her car away for at least 6 months…I have seen fathers tolerate such awful driving before, and the girl goes right out and gets in another accident…
You too? Wow, this is a tough crowd.
Lemme respectfully ask you; I’m sure you’ve had accidents, right? Did you remove yourself from driving for 6 months?
I think taking the car away for six months is harsh as well. I think a good talking to on road safety is called for, describing what to do in different scenarios, such as fishtailing, the car stalling in the middle of the road, flat tires, etc. Maybe taking another driver’s ed course.
But she may be shaken up and not want to drive for a while. Some get like that after an accident with injuries. But that’s not a good idea. I’ve found friends that did this have a very hard time getting back on the road, including my own mother, after an accident. Have your daughter drive on secondary roads only, is my advice. Don’t let her get back on a freeway for a while so she builds up her confidence again and when she feels she’s ready.
“Perhaps I don’t understand what starfcker means. But, “not at all” seems incredibly severe.” No, you understand me perfectly. I’m suggesting WIP make sure this is as incredibly severe as possible. WIP ain’t kidding. He could have very easily lost his daughter. She could have very easily killed a bunch of people. What if she had small children in the car? She majorly screwed up. Was she drinking? Does she do drugs? I’d want to know, were I WIP. Not from anger, from love. Everybody makes mistakes. If you are lucky enough to survive those mistakes, not repeating them is critical. She doesn’t need compassion right now, or helicopter parenting. She needs to feel the disapproval that comes from making a preventable mistake of that magnitude. Phrrhus gets it.
Somebody needs to take a chill pill. Seriously, dude, you admonish the Wipper for the helicopter parenting you imagine and all the while you sound like a mother hen. Sheesh.
EC
Don’t put words in my mouth. WIP did everything right
Look, dude, you want her punished to the full extent of the law, we get it. However, the poor guy who left the scene on a gurney will sue and wipper will need a lawyer to defend any charges of negligence. The insurance company will do its part to try to get him to settle for the insurance available but if you were able to look at the other side, and your famous for that, you would see that he will sue everybody involved.
Indeed, everybody makes MISTAKES.
I think you compound an already bad situation by calling forth punishments. Punishment should be reserved to doing wrong willfully on purpose.
Unjust punishment only builds resentment.
And from knowing Wip from his writings here, I most highly doubt his daughter was drinking or taking drugs. IF that were the case, then I agree with your points about harsh punishment.
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Of course, naturally, this is Wip’s call.
Wip, when this is over …. or, even as it is on going … I hope you give us updates.
I will update. NO, she does NOT do drugs or drink.
I think she would have been charged if the cops suspected she was under the influence. Testing would have been done right on the spot if the cops saw cause.
Stuck – mistakes are one thing, stupidly endangering life another. There must be consequences for that shit. Shrugging it off as just a mistake is absurd. She assumed the responsibility for driving. She screwed the pooch by stopping in the road, and there should be a substantial penalty for such gross stupidity and irresponsibility. Probably won’t be, given todays’s lack of responsibility society, though.
WIP
I’m really glad your daughter is safe and alive. With three sons, a call in the middle of the night is terrifying. My middle son was rear ended on the Schuylkill Expressway last year, but escaped uninjured and relatively minor damage to the car. He called my cell phone while I was at work, but I was in meetings and didn’t get the call. My wife had to handle it.
We all do things in the heat of the moment that in retrospect we shouldn’t have done. We can’t change it, but we can be thankful everyone is OK.
Jim,
I thank you for taking the time to comment. I remember your son’s accident story. Yes, children are beyond important. I cannot imagine my life without my girls.
Everyone is not ok. The guy taken away by ambulance for instance.,
We have received word the other driver did not sustain life threatening injuries.
LLPOH,
I do understand your point. I was so angry last night about the way my mother in-law was trying to absolve my daughter from any responsibility I started yelling at her. She threatened to leave and I said, who cares. My wife is barely talking to me. I believe there are extenuating circumstances though.
Yes, she is a legal adult who took on the responsibility of navigating an instrument of death (is that dramatic enough?). But she also deserves her day in court and we will help her.
The two biggest things that upset me about this whole thing is 1) my mother in-law and wife instantaineously telling her she did the right thing and 2) lack of concern for the driver who went to the hospital. I am VERY upset about those 2 things. I’m not saying they don’t care about the other driver it’s just that it isn’t mentioned in this whole thing.
Wip, my friend …
Do not allow this incident to spill over into Christmas Eve and Christmas!
That may mean that YOU might have to humble yourself and “bite the bullet” … perhaps by not needing to win the argument …. or, by doing whatever necessary to return peace and harmony to the Wip household. Be a Peacemaker.
Christmas should never ever be a season of strife … and I speak from great experience in that area!
Honestly, just a few moments ago I heard of a multiple car pileup with injuries and death on Route 440 in nearby Edison, NJ. My seester lives in Edison. I’m not very concerned … although I will call her shortly … because she doesn’t travel that road, and she goes to work early. Christmas will be tragic memory from now on for some of those folks.
What I’m saying is, is that you are extremely blessed to have your family intact this Christmas Season, and that includes your mother-in-law. Give her a hug … she, too, is traumatized, and needs it.
Thanks for your support.
Stuck & Star,
I think you both are bringing very good insight into this. Believe me,I appreciate it. This is exactly one of the reasons I decided to share my story. My daughter will definitely be experiencing repercussion over this. She will be, of course, paying for a replacement car, paying for a lawyer herself, getting a strongly worded lecture from me and my father in-law, from the court system etc.
Both my daughters were not allowed to drive until they could change their own tire and display the ability to jump-start their cars. But…what can I say, they were definitely brought up in a high emotion household do to my wife’s emotion first handling of EVERY damn situation. I had a loooong talk with my other daughter already about how huge of a responsibility it is to be driving on the road.
I actually told her many times I did not want her driving on the beltway even. No-one listens to fathers it seems.
WIP. She’s alive and well. You live to fight another day as a parent. You are blessed. Merry Christmas.
695 around Baltimore is very similar.
Road debris is a major issue. Nothing like having the pleasantries of meeting a wheel barrow in the middle lane at 60 mph o’dark thirty morning rush hour.
Update:
One of the officers emailed my daughter to inform her that the driver did not incur life threatening injuries. My daughter’s safety and the safety of the other driver has been #1a and #1b in my mind. I can breathe a little better today.
wipper, one off topic concern, now that we know everybody is going to be alright. Cops are universally barnyard Romeos. Best to advise daughter of romantic encounters of the cop kind.
EC
Interesting. She does seem to take to the authoritative type.
I’m becoming worried about whether or not my wife and I will get sued. We put the car in our daughter’s name (transferred title) just this past Saturday. This past Tuesday we filed with our insurance company to get the car put on her own insurance policy. However, the insurer (State Farm) said it would take a week to do that.
Let’s not get too over-worried. Part of the service you pay the insurance company is for them to protect you from further claims after they pay out the amount your covered for. State Farm is definitely a good company.
This is the first thing they do, they get a signature on their settlement sheet. You hear stuff about folks who sue for $millions but lots of folks sign on the dotted line when it is presented to them. Even if he gets one, the lawyer will encourage him to settle if he figures that’s an easy payday. The way you tell it, and it’s a good thing you recorded in almost real-time, the lawyer would have a hard time proving negligence since she was following the cop’s orders.
Take it easy on the girls, they just experienced a valuable life’s lesson and don’t need you pouring salt on the emotional wounds. You want to reassure them that they called Dad and not the evil Starfucker.
EC
I’m in protection mode and teaching mode at the same time. I’ll settle down in a few days. Believe it or not, we’ve had more severe family issues before and survived. I do look forward to talking to a lawyer, getting the police report and getting a subpoena for the off duty cop who gave her the instructions to put her hazards on and run over to the shoulder to where she was.
I used to work for an attorney that handled accident claims, among other things. The attorney I worked for would go for the highest amount available through the insurance policy, and settle after that. In my experience, few fight for more.
I guess I missed where the cop told her to stop in the middle of the road. That was the error of consequence.
Deference to the authority of a costume, rather than the authority of the situation – reality – was the error of consequence.
18’s not an error.
And especially not 18 that’s been trained to follow orders. But training kids to follow orders is an error.
The copfuk-otherfuks spectrum is wide. Sea to shining sea wide. But perhaps 18 is still young enough to back out of that box canyon training.
The reason a race track is safer, besides the cushion of participant experience, is that everyone is going the same way. *Moving* in the same direction. Nobody with a mechanical error\malfunction *stops* in the middle of a track. At the least they coast off track. If they can power off, they do: incoming from your six. And if a flag goes up, it’s behind the accident, not right on top of it (a la copfuk).
I learned a lot on tracks. Have said that nobody ought to be on the road that doesn’t have racing experience. But they are – & my racing experience has kept me out of a lot of nonsense accidents.
There are racing schools. There are tracks to practice on after graduation. There is a way to develop mindset, technique, reflexes, muscle memory.
steve says:
December 21, 2017 at 10:19 am
___________
The above is the best comment of all. I think young woman is going to be sued at the least.
sorry if this shows up 2 …or 3 times…
About a month ago, we had some hurricane winds and rain early in the morning… power was out all over the place… I was on my way to work, and all of a sudden I saw a spruce tree lying across the road. I couldn’t stop in time and veered towards the small end. It whipped over the hood and smashed the windshield, took off my mirror, left side light, couple other minor things. I don’t carry collision insurance, just liability and comprehensive. The insurance company said comprehensive wouldn’t cover it. They considered it a collision. So, in short, if there’s something in the f’ing road and you don’t see it and hit it, it’s your own fault for driving too fast in conditions that don’t allow you to brake in time to avoid hitting it.
At this point what difference does it make. She is alive and well and we are happy for you.
Apple does not fall far from the tree. Glad she survived.
WTF does that mean?
LLPOH is a day late and a dollar short. He waits for everyone else’s comments and then swoops in with his Master Blaster commenting style.
LLPOH, I am sure about 3 things.
1) you are insured to the hilt.
2) if this was your daughter you would get the best lawyer you could.
3) if a person was killed in the job you would throw a lawyer and your insurance policy at whoever you were battling and not lose a minutes sleep. Even if it was company negligence.
Tell me different and you will most assuredly out yourself as a liar.
WIP – guess you missed the part where I said you need to take care of her. That is your job. Society’s job is to punish her for her gross stupidity.
Re your points, 1) if you are not well insured you are an idiot. 2) Would I take care of my own? Absolutely. Same as I said you should do.
Re your third point, you are sadly mistaken. I would lose a lot of sleep over it. Your implication there is despicable.
But I have not failed to notice that you are already trying to spin it so that anyone but your daughter is to blame. You losing any sleep over the guy she almost killed? Seems mostly you are worried about your own ass. Have you called the hospital? Sent flowers? Called the family?
Yup, you are a real stand up guy to be lecturing me.
I was on your side. Just not the moron kid you raised.
BTW – what it means is that generally you, WIP, often do not even have the brains God gave an ant. Parking in the middle of an expressway was an apple falling close to the tree.
But what the hell, the other driver lived. Everything is cool.
You are a moron. Go back and read all of my comments and then come back here and kiss my fucking ass. How many people do you know that would write an article like this? How many fathers/mothers do you think would come on here and make the comments I have made concerning this situation?
I know you wouldn’t cause you’re to busy going around telling everyone how smart you are and how dumb everyone else is. Sounds like a narcissist.
My daughter is going to find out exactly who was responsible for that guy by the OPINION/LAWS OF THE COURT SYSTEM.
Would you kill yourself or send yourself to prison if your company was negligent?
Sometimes you are dumber than fuck.
WIP, read the article I linked above. I wrote it two and a half years ago, when I was the other guy. In broad daylight. And still nearly got killed. I have not disparaged your daughter one time in this thread. But this is not a trivial mistake. And she’s extremely lucky nobody got killed, especially her. Don’t listen to the bleeding hearts. Lloph it’s probably more right than I am. It is your duty to protect her with all your might. But I hope the courts hammer her good, and she learns a big lesson out of this. Cuz she may not survive next time. Or she might kill some other innocent people. Hopefully within the next couple of years she’ll have some little WIP grandkids. Where would they have been in a situation like this? Tough love. There’s reasons for it
Don’t go the way of LLPOH. You and he are putting words in my mouth.
GO BACK AND REREAD MY COMMENTS. I have in no way trivialized this event. I am very glad you survived. I am very glad my daughter survived and the crash victim survived. My main complaint is in the way it is currently being told to my daughter by my mother in-law and my wife. Although, I believe my wife is coming around. I do believe there are extenuating circumstances.
BUT…I believe/hope/demand that my daughter’s eyes will be open when the lawyer has a go at her. I have used him before and I will ask him ahead of time to scare the living shit out of her during the consultation.
I will update this post because I believe it is very important. My daughter is going to be paying for everything including and not limited to, the lawyer, the fines, the old car, her new/used car etc. I will NOT be bailing her out of this.
Please reread the article if need be and all of the comments I have made.
“Don’t listen to the bleeding hearts. ”
I think you should just shut the fuck up at this point. You made your point that Wip should be a dick of a father enough times already.
At least the other car wasn’t a Tesla. Your dick would have exploded.
WIP, if it makes you feel any better, I’ll pay to have extenuating circumstances carved into her headstone. Stucky.”Punishment should be reserved to doing wrong willfully on purpose.” Like a five-year-old running out into the street without looking, where he might get smooshed by a car. Or an 18 year old putting the car in park, and getting out in the middle of the night on the beltway. “Here lies Little Miss WIP, She and all of her little kids died of extenuating circumstances”
Your comment below.
My punishment comment was in reference to the CURRENT issue at hand.
For example, if she was under the influence. Or, texting while driving.
Making her pay for the car, lawyer, etc. is not a punishment. It’s being responsible.
You’re twisting things around and putting words in people’s mouths. Not sure what you hope to accomplish.
“Just not the moron kid you raised.”
HOLY FUCK!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!
is that really necessary?? Over a Christmas weekend?? Calling someone’s kid a moron?? And, by implication, the father as well? Because you simply disagree with HIS choice of parenting? On a Christmas weekend??? Moron?
HOLY FUCK!!!!!!!!!
What a low blow,man.
SMH. SMH. SMH.
I’m outta this thread. This bullshit is getting ugly for no Fucken good reason.
Stuck – yup, maybe a bit over the top. But…
– he directly said that I would not lose sleep over the death of an employee,
– that if I denied it I would be a liar
Thems fighting words. Further,
– he posted this, not me. And if parking in the middle of a fucking expressway is not moronic, then I do not know what is.
You losing any sleep over the guy she almost killed?
Yes
Seems mostly you are worried about your own ass.
No, not mostly. But show me anyone on earth that isn’t worried about their own ass.
Have you called the hospital? Sent flowers? Called the family?
These are very good questions. I will ask my lawyer what he recommends.
While a lovely gesture, my GUESS is that it’s not a good idea to contact the guy.
The guys lawyer: “Look, judge, he sent my client flowers. That proves he felt responsible!!”
Far-fetched? Only if you trust lawyers. Remember Miranda about shit being held against you.
I posted a response to this WIP comment, Stuck replied, I replied. Those are now gone. But WIP’s original saying I would not lose sleep over the death of an employee remains. Interesting.
Try “refresh”.
Do you see my comment…
You are a moron. Go back and read all of my comments and then come back here and kiss my fucking ass. How many people do you know that would write an article like this? How many fathers/mothers do you think would come on here and make the comments I have made concerning this situation?
I know you wouldn’t cause you’re to busy going around telling everyone how smart you are and how dumb everyone else is. Sounds like a narcissist.
My daughter is going to find out exactly who was responsible for that guy by the OPINION/LAWS OF THE COURT SYSTEM.
Would you kill yourself or send yourself to prison if your company was negligent?
Sometimes you are dumber than fuck.
Wip – you dish shit out, but truth be told you and your kin seem dumber than a sack of rocks. I suspect it is the gene pool. You Appalachian?
When you said I would not lose sleep over the death of an employee, you get what you get.
And by the sound of it, given your experience with lawyers and all, this is not your first rodeo wth piles of shit.
In my whole life I never needed a lawyer for piles of shit. Never been sued. Never sued. Never defended. But you? Boy howdy.
Trouble follows idiots.
You aren’t helping your case.
1) WIP needs to help his daughter
2) the public has every right to want his daughter to serve time for the gross stupidity that resulted in severe injuries to another, that could easily have been fatal. These acts of stupidity should not be tolerated by society. Severe financial consequences, jail time, and permanent loss of license seems totally reasonable given the issues she caused. She could have easily killed that other person.
I hope you’re kidding,
Not even a little bit. She could have killed that other driver out of her gross stupidity and negligence. Why should thee not be extreme penalty for that? Personal responsibility for one’s actions needs to be the norm.
If one of my kids were injured by her gross stupidity I would have wanted her incarcerated. If one were killed, I would have been less than forgiving.
Vic, read my link above. This was hardly a trivial mistake. The alternative to letting the courts hammer into her head how serious is was, is to minimize it, and then let Darwin work his magic on her sometime in the near future
You equate not throwing the book at her with minimizing?
That is a false conclusion. Her facing no consequences would be minimizing. I already stated — and we all know — that consequences are coming.
Darwin would be appalled.
You guys are heartless! Yes, I’m a female, but I have common sense, so don’t think I’m just soft. Shit happens beyond your control. Was she even able to take the car out of the road.? The cop sure didn’t think so. Otherwise, she would have instructed her to do so. But, no, she told her to turn on her emergency lights and run to the side of the road next to the cop. What does that suggest? Give the girl her day in court and then we’ll see.
By the way, aren’t you the two that decided the police officer who murdered the guy in the hallway who was begging for his life were just doing their duty ? You guys have a warped sense of justice.
Really Vic? You don’t think she can control getting her car off the highway. A car with a flat tire doesn’t stop running. You just drive with a flat the same as you would drive with four good tires, until you get the car out of the road and yourself to safety and not present a hazard to anyone else. Sounds to me like the cop was just trying to get her out of the middle of the f****** highway. A pedestrian on Interstate at night is dead meat. The cop had to tell her to turn on her flashers? Parks her car in the middle of a f****** super highway in the middle of the night, gets out, and doesn’t even turn her flashers on? In Virginia everyone has road flares in their car. Did she light a flare? Everyone congratulating WIP for having his daughter home safe for the holidays. What about the guy she injured? Doesn’t he deserve the same thing? You say you have common sense? Hardly. Dumb as a rock
I’ve had to drive a car with a flat tire and it’s much harder. The car is much slower and not easy to handle, especially for a female who has less upper-body strength.
I’m not going to continue arguing the point because you guys are apparently experts on justice, and nothing I say is going to change your mind, so why bother.
Vic – for fuck sake, her car had power steering. Now you are just being stupid. She could easily have gotten that car off the road.
I can’t reply to your post because there’s no “reply” button, so I have to answer on my post.
My car had power steering as well. But when you get a flat tire, the car pulls to the side of the flat. A flat tire is hard to steer because “it’s flat.” Flat things don’t roll well. I know because I had to cross a long bridge over a river with a flat tire. I was already on the bridge before I realized the tire was going flat. Halfway across, it was entirely flat. It was no picnic.
I have to work now, so I can’t come back on the site until later tonight.
By the way, my flat tire was on the front of the car, which is why steering was hard to do. Never had a flat on a back tire so don’t know what that’s like. Don’t know which tire (s) was flattened on Wip’s daughter’s car.
Wow. Why not add the death penalty? THAT WILL TEACH THAT GROSSLY STUPID AND NEGLIGENT YOUNG WOMAN!!
If “acts of stupidity” were not tolerated by society, then I would be typing this from prison. And so would you … for you have shared here that you’ve done stupid shit.
You are a most severe taskmaster. That’s not a criticism, it’s just your choice, while others are more lenient. To each his own. But, I’m glad you’re not my dad! ?
Stuck – I have done stupid stuff. None of it got anyone severely injured. It is the consequence that matters. People must be held accountable for the consequences of their actions. She injured someone. There needs to be a severe penalty for that.
Oh, and my kids love me! And they are excelling. And hope to inherit (ha! Like that will happen.)
Stucky, she almost arranged the death penalty for herself, and possibly others. That’s why we’re being so harsh. This isn’t something you want to see repeated
It seems to me that there is something wrong with llpoh. As a culture we seem to have forgotten that we live in a world where “shit happens”. As much as we want to, there are a lot of things we can’t control. Being a father of 6 children, I have been amazed at the incredibly stupid things they can do. They aren’t bad, they are human. WIP can be thankful that this time his family didn’t suffer horrible consequences. He can be humbled as so many do suffer horrible consequences for their mistakes or the mistakes of others. This was a great season for WIP and his family.
There is absolutely nothing “wrong” with Llpoh.
Middle-aged cunt – what about the family of the other driver that suffered severe/horrible consequences because of the gross stupidity of WIP’s kid? Guess that does not matter to you, so long as your/WIP’s kid is ok.
Fuck that shit. WIP needs to do all he can to help his daughter. Soceity needs to do all it can to make people responsible for their actions. His kid needs to be punished severely. She almost killed another human due to her gross negligence.
100 !!!!!!
She could have been stopped in the road for any amount of reasons.. traffic could have been backed up… or large debris in the road. If someone rear-ends you because you’re stopped in the road, it’s their freakin’ fault for not paying attention. Don’t waste money on a lawyer until you know you actually need one. Let the insurance companies work it out first.
Lot of folks shootin’ from the hip here. Disabled police car on the scene immediately… would have had all its lights flashing. Three other disabled vehicles, including Wip’s daughter in a passing lane, presumably with the flashers on as ordered by police officer on the scene. Bit of chaos, eh guys? I would hold off any judgement until the facts are on the table.
Gryffyn, thank you for that common-sense response.
Youknowwhoiam, I agree with your comment except for the attorney part. I had to serve on a jury for an accident case. The plaintiff wouldn’t settle and took the driver to court. The defendants represented themselves and the plaintiff had an attorney. Guess who won? There was no contest.
It’s definitely better to have legal advice at the beginning so no wrong moves are made. Just as someone asked Wip if he sent the hospitalized man flowers. Not unless your attorney says it’s OK. Things like that can be used against you. Attorneys can twist things so the jury thinks you’re guilty..
15 years ago. 695 Balt beltway. N bound driving a 10 ton flatbed with a 3 axle trailer. Ford van strapped to trailer. 3 cars ahead, heavy traffic, driving rain, old dindu comes to a complete stop, missed his exit. No chance to stop. Went 3 wide to the right, hit grass on a triangle of land bounded by an entry ramp and the beltway. Pumping brakes, praying, tight hard right turn, did a 360 with the trailer doing a crack the whip.Plowed up a lot of grass and dirt. Miracle. Got stopped. No hurt. No damage. Did’nt even pop a tire or 6. Praise God to this day.