Tag: Carly Fiorina
Trump Engineers a Linguistic Kill Shot for Fiorina
Guest Post by Scott Adams
Disclaimer: For new readers, this is part of my series on Trump’s skills as a persuader. I am analyzing events through the filter of my Master Wizard Hypothesis. The Master Wizard Hypothesis says that Trump is playing three-dimensional chess with a two-dimensional world and he will win the presidency in a landslide. (The alternative hypothesis is that he is nothing but the loudest “outsider” and will flame-out soon.)
I don’t know which candidate would do the best job as president. I am not that smart. But I am impressed with Trump’s game. I write about it for entertainment. Don’t take cartoonists too seriously.
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The Fiorina Linguistic Kill Shot: “Look at that face!”
This morning I see that the press is playing rusty trombone on Rolling Stone’s article about Trump and his unkind comments about Carly Fiorina’s appearance. The press is furiously trying to manufacture news out of the quote and doing a good job of it so far.
You won’t appreciate the beauty of Trump’s game until you read the entire article, and that takes too long. But if you do, look for a Master Wizard making a Rolling Stones writer fall in love with him while setting up the writer to transmit the Fiorina kill shot embedded in a sexist-sounding comment.
And the Outragists danced and shouted. As planned.
See the search results on Trump’s linquistic kill shot this morning, below the post here.
Continue reading “Trump Engineers a Linguistic Kill Shot for Fiorina”
Fiorina Has High Name Recognition Among Thousands She Fired
Guest Post by Andy Borowitz
Credit PHOTOGRAPH BY SCOTT OLSON/GETTY
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—One day after the former Hewlett-Packard C.E.O. Carly Fiorina announced her candidacy for the 2016 Republican Presidential nomination, a new poll shows that she enjoys extremely high name recognition among the tens of thousands of former H.P. employees she fired.
According to the poll, conducted by the University of Minnesota’s Opinion Research Institute, Fiorina’s name recognition stands at a hundred per cent among the legions of employees she terminated, with many of them calling the former C.E.O. “unforgettable.”
Additionally, a broad majority of the laid-off workers described their feelings about Fiorina as “intense,” and noted that very few days go by when they do not invoke her name in a vehement manner.
Davis Logsdon, who supervised the survey for the University of Minnesota, said that Fiorina’s entry into the Republican race had “energized” many former H.P. employees.
“Most of them were apathetic about the race before, but now they are very excited to see how it plays out for Carly Fiorina,” he said.
Impressively, Fiorina’s hundred-per-cent name recognition among fired H.P. employees ranks her ahead of other names mentioned in the survey, such as Darth Vader (ninety-nine per cent) and Satan (ninety-seven per cent).