Here is why I don’t go out shopping on Black Friday. If it comes down to it and I have to go up against someone like this for what I want, I’m gonna lose 10 out of 10 times. I’ll pay the extra $20 for my Keurig machine and not have to shit my own pants, thank you.
Well now. I see the buns are all warm and ready for Thanksgiving….don’t mind if I do.
Because “Home Wrecking Whore” isn’t very kid friendly.
Listen officer, I couldn’t pick her up if I tried. Hahahaha *officer puts on cuffs*
See, I can understand someone’s deep dark fear of clowns if they attended the Love Circus.
Girl you got one of dem asses people just want to follow around!!!….Oh, no I didn’t mean that in a good way. No, not at all. I meant they follow you around to take pictures to send in to us.
I’ve got nothing against people that need scooters, especially the elderly….What I do have a thing for however, is irony. Someone running into a glasses stand tickles me deep down inside and I enjoy it.
Whether it’s heritage or hate, you still look like a jackass parading around the deli section with your Confederate flag.
If every person you know doesn’t call you mustache face then they have failed us all.
– Bad news: Whatever you did with that Jimmy Cap in a Walmart bathroom is absolutely disgusting and you nasty.
– Good news: The type of person that would use a condom in a Walmart bathroom isn’t procreating.
Buddy, super hot girls barely get away with wearing cutoff jorts and a belly shirt. What makes you think you can rock it out? Seriously, what makes you think that? I need to know so we can somehow correct that part of your thought process.
I’m not quite sure what type of animal she is trying to be but I can tell you it certainly is a promiscuous one.
When you gots to have it, you gots to have it.
Woman Arrested For Masturbating With Jimmy Dean Sausage In Walmart Bathroom.
The male security guard says he knocked on the bathroom door several times but the woman did not respond. He then announced he was entering. What he found behind the door of the unlocked stall is something he said will “haunt his dreams forever.” The security guard reports when he entered the stall, Johnson was inappropriately pleasing herself with a Jimmy Dean package of sausage. He said that when he entered “She didn’t even stop. She just stared at me and kept going.”
Shocked, and also frightened for his safety due to the fact that Johnson is a “big girl,” the 140 pound security guard said he ran out until police arrived. When they did, female officers entered the restroom with Johnson still “putting in work with the sausage.”
She is probably pulling those shorts out for that sweet release. Those things are so tight I don’t think even a fart could escape.
I don’t think that’s what they mean when people say they can feel Jesus inside them.
Has anyone in the history of the world gotten laid from a number found in a bathroom stall? I honestly couldn’t even imagine the amount of penicillin it would take for me to even want to have sex with someone that has their number up in a public dumper!
How are pants with booty writing still a thing? This is probably the first time in my life I wish I was illiterate.
Who would have thought we would be able to see boobies and pussy just by looking at your back. Almost seems like you’re an answer to a riddle.
Here we go again. The dying legacy media will continue to support the status quo, who provide their dwindling advertising revenue, by papering over the truth with platitudes, lies, and misinformation. I have been detailing the long slow death of retail in America for the last few years. The data and facts are unequivocal. Therefore, the establishment and their media mouthpieces need to suppress the truth.
They spin every terrible report in the most positive way possible. They blame lousy retail results on the weather. They blame them on calendar effects. They blame them on gasoline sales plunging. That one is funny, because we heard for months that retail spending would surge because people had more money in their pockets from the huge decline in gasoline prices.
September retail sales were grudgingly reported by the Census Bureau this morning and they were absolutely dreadful. This followed an atrocious August report. The MSM couldn’t blame it on snow, cold, flooding, drought, or even swarms of locusts. So they just buried the story in their small print headlines. The propaganda media machine had nothing. They continue to spew the drivel about a 5.1% unemployment rate as a reflection of a booming jobs market. If we really have a booming jobs market, we would have a booming retail sector. The stagnant retail market reveals the jobs data to be fraudulent. The 94 million people supposedly not in the job market can’t buy shit with their good looks.
You see a Walmart Halloween prank. I see an accurate depiction of every Walmart cashier I’ve ever dealt with.
Halloween on a budget makes me smile more than it should. Sick Leeloo costume bro.
Not quite the cottonmouth your buddies probably had in mind, but you do you buddy.